Saturday, May 9, 2020

i can smell & taste.

i'm not, otherwise, sore.

no gastric issues.

really, i'm just dehydrated....
https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/windsor/record-low-temperatures-windsor-1.5563289
we're used to swings in temperature at this time of the year in this part of the world, but this is a little much, even for here:


the dashes are average highs and lows.

that might be a record low for that date on the 11th if it happens.

but, let's hope that's the end of not just this season but the ass end of this cycle.
i just slept some more....

do i think i finally picked this thing up?

well, i get tired when i have migraines, so it's not clear which is the culprit. some other signs...

- i don't have a thermometer i can use for a fever, but i am feeling a little warm. i've checked the thermometer i bought last year, though, and guess what? it's actually unusually warm in here.
- i started coughing last night and it's lingering, but i was reacting to second hand smoke (since passed, apparently) and it feels like a smokers' cough.
- the headache is getting better, but it is also triggered by dry air and smoke.

there's a very weird cold snap going through here right now that should lift in a day or two.

in the meantime, i didn't get that shower yet and am looking forward to it.

i dunno. i know i feel dehydrated...
another way to look at montreal is like this: staying closed may not save many or even any lives, but, at this point, you almost want to question whether it is better to stay closed to respect the dead.

if they're going to peak in a week or two, is it worth reopening now?

there's maybe a place for business owners to make that choice. it's not so clear from a distance.
i stopped to eat some fruit, and i had to pause halfway through the broader meal, but i'm feeling a lot better.

the air has cleared out in here, thankfully.

so, i'm going to get some spaghetti in me, take a shower and hopefully get back to it before sunset...
there is of course a caveat to apocalyptic scenarios in any city - eventually, you run out of vulnerable people to kill.

these were my projections at the beginning of april, and these numbers are simply based on protective immunity:

what are my number of projected deaths in....

1) new york city: (5799, 17398, 28997)  [projection: low end]
2) gta:  (4133, 12399, 20665)   [projection: low end]
3) montreal: (2800, 8399, 13999) [projection: low end]
4) detroit (metro area): (2866, 8599, 14332) [projection: expect something more like the middle number, due to higher comorbidity]

new york city and the detroit metro area have both passed the lower numbers, but neither have hit the middle numbers. i think i may have underestimated the effects of diabetes in new york city.

montreal is at about half the lower number and starting to ramp up. and, this hasn't even started in the gta, yet.

the point i'm making is that there are upper bounds, here, and while they may look gruesome, you have to continually remember that this is really very much an old person and already-very-sick person thing - which isn't to trivialize it, so much as to reinforce the point that the vulnerable need to stay inside.

we've all known old people. they don't fucking listen. and, at some point, we just have to accept the reality - it doesn't matter what rules we pass, and it doesn't matter how much we all "sacrifice", if they're just going to waltz around like it's their day of reckoning, anyways.

it doesn't matter what else we do if they don't stay inside - and if they do stay inside, it doesn't matter what else we do, either. we're focusing on the wrong concern....
if montreal peaks mid-may, that means toronto is a little further behind than we thought, too - it might not peak until early june or even a little later.
so, this is my advice to montreal - reopen or don't reopen, it doesn't really matter.

what's more important is that the vulnerable remain isolated.
i would take this with a grain of salt, and the reason is that there really isn't any convincing evidence that the reproduction number is decreasing or is likely to decrease any time soon.

the argument is essentially "if you loosen restrictions, the reproduction number will go back over 1".

but, it seems to me that it's already over 1, that it's been over 1 for a long time and that it doesn't seem likely that much of anything besides literal martial law is going to take it under it. they're going to have to let it run it's course.

my position has been consistent from the start: if i thought these hare-brained schemes were likely to work, i'd be likely to support them. like everybody else, i want to minimize unnecessary death. but, i don't think they're going to work, so what's the point?

it's probably too late to even have this discussion, in montreal. you should be having this discussion in toronto, where you might still be able to salvage it if you overreact in the most extreme way imaginable.

i think this took longer than anybody expected, but montreal needs to brace for impact.

and, it's not the last city in line, either.

https://montreal.ctvnews.ca/loosening-restrictions-could-mean-huge-increase-in-montreal-covid-19-deaths-report-1.4932199
i have never been diagnosed with clinical depression, and i've never claimed i suffer from it, ever.
i do not self-medicate.

i'm not even depressed.

i'm just frustrated that i can't focus.
i don't write folk music or hip-hop or techno. i make very technical, complicated progressive rock.

that means that i need to be able to think clearly - to work out time signatures, to do math on the fly.

being stoned just doesn't work for me.

i'm sorry - i'm not that person, i never was and i never will be. i don't want to be.
i do not smoke drugs or drink alcohol when i'm creative. ever.

it makes me stupid and unproductive.
what i want right now, and will want for the near future, is total sobriety so i can work on my art.

i can't work when i'm stoned.

ok?
the legal pot in this province is terrible. it's not worth buying.

i have no intention on being inebriated for months, and i'm going to get fucking livid if i'm forced to get stoned against my will.
it's absolutely revolting and disgusting in every conceivable way.

i should not be forced to deal with this.
why do i have to say this every fucking time?

why don't you just get this worthless, piece of shit out of here?
again -

can you get this disgusting pig upstairs out of here, please? there's a respiratory virus going around, i don't want to be breathing in second-hand smoke.

it tends to be ok in here until i go for groceries, at which point the fucking idiots seem to think that observing me bum a cigarette at the grocery store means i must not care if they smoke in the house, which is wrong in every way.

as has been the case now for nearly five years, i do not smoke habitually. the fact that i might bum a smoke when i'm out does not mean it's ok to smoke in the house. and, while this is not hypocrisy, it wouldn't matter if it is - what matters is that i've signed a non-smoking lease, and i expect it to be upheld.

so, if you're going to put a fucking pig upstairs to do what, i don't know, can you get one that doesn't smoke, please?

thank you.
they should have sent the military into the geriatric facilities immediately, and let everybody else carry on.
and, don't blame it on science, either - the science never supported any of this.

blame it on twitter, and blame it on politicians that valued twitter over science.
"so, why did we do this, then? was it for nothing?"

yes. we were stupid...

we did something that didn't work, and we need to come to terms with it and cut our losses and move on.
yeah, here comes the migraine....

i'm going to have to go in the other room and sit over the sink and let the humidity come back up.
the feds may be frustrated, but they need to look in the mirror - it's their own policy that failed.
has montreal peaked? it's closer than everywhere else, but not yet, i don't think.

did closing businesses stop the spread of the virus? clearly not.

is the virus going to burn out? obviously not.

so, that means they will get to protective immunity first, and will consequently be able to reopen first, while everybody else is waiting for immunity to build.
the cop should be banned from the force and charged with assault, and the worker should receive a hefty payout from the city.

https://nationalpost.com/news/outside-police-agency-to-review-how-officers-handled-run-in-with-costumed-worker
Does someone, somewhere (in the federal government) understand why Quebec, that has more than half of the COVID-19 deaths in the country, is the first to reopen? 

you would in fact expect the hardest hit areas to be the first to reopen, yes. that's how this will work, generally.
well, the shut down didn't work in slowing the spread, so why would you hold to a failed policy, expecting it to magically start working, all of a sudden?

https://nationalpost.com/news/politics/why-would-he-pick-a-fight-with-us-covid-19-raises-tensions-between-trudeau-government-and-quebec
if people want to gamble, they will gamble.

that is all.
"15% unemployment?. meh. pass the caviar."
so, they released the worst jobs report in decades and the stock market rallied. record unemployment? pop the champagne...

it's a casino.
i may have avoided the migraine by sleeping it off.

it doesn't usually work like that, though.

so, i feel like i'm on borrowed time this morning. but, let's try this anyways...
it's the dry air and the smoke....and, here it comes again....
ugh.

the pollution in here is triggering another migraine.

fuck.

Friday, May 8, 2020

why do i have to do this every time i leave the house?

dear pig upstairs,

yes, i am a non-smoker, still.

please stop smoking near the house. it's making me sick.

thanks,
jessica
no...

there is no convincing evidence that he is, in truth, the lesser creep at all, is there?
.....at least we think he's the lesser creep?
so, i don't want to hear people defend joe biden on a sexual assault accusation. you can't; he's indefensible.

i want to hear people be honest and work their way through it rationally.

yes - he's a creep.

but, he's the lesser creep.
but, it's just one instantiation of a general farcical reality.

you couldn't vote for him if you were a pacifist, either. or an environmentalist. or even much of a garden variety liberal.
i'd suspect that biden assaults some kind of mammal at least once on your average day before he gets his morning coffee.
listen - it's not a question of believing tara reade, it's a question of realizing that the accused is joe biden.

even if he didn't do it, he'd might as well have.

but, what are you going to do? vote for trump?
well, we seem to have jumped about ten years, now, from the flq crisis to 13% unemployment - and passed over joe clark, altogether. i guess progress in this century is living up to it's hype, as being exponential.

i'm going to kill myself if we end up with another fucking mulroney after this.
where was i?

i got a brutal migraine early on monday morning, right as i was finishing the master document, and had to put aside grocery shopping until tuesday. it took me until wednesday morning before i was finally in for good, showered and ready to....sleep. a lot...

yesterday never really got started, and i ended up crashing before the sun came down, for a good 12 hours or so. i've just been exhausted - both mentally and physically.

it's now friday afternoon, and i've decided that i'm going to get started on the rebuild, with the intent of finishing it up over the weekend, before moving on. a number of other things have popped up, but i want to get this done first before i pivot.

so, let's hope the weekend is productive.

Thursday, May 7, 2020

the news reports are suggesting this is going to kill 200,000 africans.

i'd suggest more like 5 million.
i've been totally scatter-brained today....

let me do the things i was doing, first, before i start looking at launching another court case.

i don't have a choice. i'm not going to waste my time fucking around with a judge that won't look at evidence, so he's tied my hands. i have no choice but to aggressively try to get him fired.

he should have looked at the evidence...
so, to summarize.

1) the federal court has given itself jurisdiction to hear reviews of cjc rulings.
2) this has been upheld by the federal court of appeal.
3) the supreme court has refused to interfere.

there has since been a supreme court ruling that i think has been widely misunderstood, in the sense that it doesn't give councils greater deference but rather subsumes the concept of correctness into the concept of reasonableness - a step backwards in my view, to be sure, but not one that is likely to make a substantive difference, in context.

i should be able to file this, but i can't access the site...
"you think you're god because you have a robe and you can put people up the god damn river for 20 years? well you're not."

let's take this fucker down a notch.

that's right, "justice" corbett - you're getting dragged to federal court by a self-represented litigant that you decided you didn't want to take seriously.

i'll see you there.

good.

oversight is the right approach; at the end of the day, the cjc is just another tribunal, and shouldn't have super powers.

https://www.ctvnews.ca/canada/supreme-court-won-t-hear-dispute-over-discipline-of-federally-appointed-judges-1.4727121
actually, the federal court seems to have an efiling system, meaning i might not have to wait.

let me do some reading tonight.
it seems like i'll need to file it in federal court, rather than divisional court.
i don't like being talked down to, and am not going to tolerate it.
more:
https://cjc-ccm.ca/sites/default/files/documents/2019/2018-08-29%20Girouard%20Order%20and%20Reasons.pdf
so, i'm going to have to appeal the judicial council's ruling on the judge's conduct, which is...

a jury of your peers, right? it's a farce - this jury is full of judges. but, i'm trying to make a point, here, about fair judicial conduct for self-represented litigants, and i'm going to have to follow through with it.

so, how do i file a judicial review against the judicial council? by filing with the court that i made the complaint in!

it's going to be a while, one way or another. but, let's put this aside for later....

https://www.thelawyersdaily.ca/articles/7270
close your windows - there's some bad air moving in.

it's thought that the plague went air-borne a few times, and there's been this persistent fear about ebola getting into the wind, which would be a bloodbath. thankfully, the corona virus itself is relatively weak - or at least is for now. but, this is about the worst transmission vector you could imagine.

in the middle ages, you were dealing with soot from burning wood at relatively low concentrations. nowadays, air pollution is everywhere.

maybe i really did catch this thing last year...

so, i watched the planet of the humans this morning...

i didn't find this "documentary", if you want to even call it that, it was really more of a mash-up, to be particularly controversial, but i didn't find it very enlightening, either. it's really just the kind of empty trash you expect from the genre. while people like al gore and bill mckibben are really not defamable at this point, so this was relatively mild as far as these things go, i was also expecting it to focus more on a degrowth or depopulation agenda based on the reviews, and it really didn't; it made the classic discursive error of articulating a problem relatively well, without even really trying to present a solution. so, now what? and, if you just have crickets, then what was the point?

the film's thesis is something like this: the narrator was some kind of hippie from michigan that went up into the upper peninsula to live a thoreauvian existence, then, like thoreau, got jaded at the hypocrisy and ignorance underlying the movement defining what he did. so, now, he's lashing out at the ideology that led him astray, and the people he holds responsible for misleading him. also, we're all going to die if we don't smarten up. in the process, he ducks and weaves through all kinds of strawmen, some of which are more worthwhile to disassemble than others, without ever conceding the obvious point - sustainability implies moderation, by definition.

so, yes - if you had this idea that all we had to do was build millions of wind turbines and we'd be able to fly to the cottage on the weekends as offsets, then you weren't thinking clearly, but that has more to do with the underlying critique of capitalism than it does with anything about the environmental movement; he's certainly right to point out that there have been unrealistic expectations attached to green technology, but he's declining to point out that these critiques have been there all along, and that not many people bought into this as deeply as he seems to have.

i remember back in 2011, i met some kids at the occupy protest that wanted to go live in the woods, and were insistent on living "off the grid". they seemed to honestly think that burning wood was more sustainable, and wanted me to come with them. i couldn't believe what i was hearing; wood? no - that would be terrible. mass protest is about converting the grid, not avoiding it. but, all i got were blank stares, and i do believe they went out into the woods to live like nineteenth century colonists. let's hope they didn't shoot any indians.

as a lifelong environmentalist, myself, i've never had any desire to turn back the clocks, so i don't feel betrayed by the realization that it was a lie - i would have told you that in the first place. rather, we need to reduce energy by altering our lifestyle decisions, which means doing things like getting rid of family cars, and abolishing suburbs. i've never bought into the fantasy the narrator did; for as long as i can actually remember, i've been arguing that we need to change all of the things that the narrator thought we could keep. i'm consequently in broad agreement with the crux of the thing, even if it didn't provide me with any compelling insights.

the strawmans are consequently on both sides - he is presenting the environmental movement as promising things it has never promised, and he is presenting environmentalists as buying into promises that we've never really bought into. the critique may be valid if applied to himself, but that's just it - he should speak for himself, not pretend he's speaking for others. i know few activists that were as naive as he appears to have been.

so, yes - the future is going to need to be more efficient, but it's also going to need to utilize renewables as best as we can, and he shouldn't be suggesting otherwise. if all he really means to say is that solar panels are not a panacea and that wind turbines are not a magic bullet, then i'm hardly in disagreement with the basic point, even if i didn't feel it needed to be said. if all he meant to say was something like "there will be some place in the future for electric vehicles, but what we really need to do is get used to taking the subway" then that's a perfectly valid and reasonable position, even if he appears to be coming at it from a place of rather bizarre privilege that i'm having trouble relating to. but, we shouldn't move and shift in extremes - recognizing that solar panels are not a panacea does not rob them of all utility, and that's an error he seems to be leaning towards. he seems to want absolutes, extremes, certainties - and i guess maybe the section with the psychologist is him realizing that. he thinks like a fundamentalist; he's an extremist. we're not all like that, most of us can think dialectically, and will support moderate and pragmatic policy options.

the last thing i want to draw some attention to is degrowth, because we're kind of stuck in this; the film avoids the topic, but it leans there, so it's the inevitable next point, and i suspect there's been plenty of googling done...

if the argument is something like "we'd better drastically change our way of existing, or we're all going to die", where does degrowth leave us? these proposals would cut our population down to a few million. and, what happens to all these billons of people?

well, they die. which is what you were trying to prevent....? no?

i'm all for condoms and abortion on demand and all the other things we can do to try to reduce the growth rate, but be careful with these macabre degrowth types, who flirt with nazi implementation schemes that would wipe out 90% of us. you surely don't think you'd be chosen do you?

the reality is that growth rates in the advanced nations are slowing, or declining. the pen, here, is mightier than the sword; the best way to reduce the population is to eradicate poverty.

obviously, you should not drop your kids off with your parents right now.
so, he thinks you should drop your kids off with their grandparents.

can somebody fire this fucking idiot for me?

thanks.

https://montreal.ctvnews.ca/quebec-s-family-minister-says-parents-should-keep-children-at-home-if-possible-1.4927608
time is such a weird thing. you can really throw yourself off if you're not paying attention.

i got out of the shower this morning around 10:00ish and found myself asleep rather quickly. i only got a few hours last night, so that's not particularly odd. after a nap, i turned the chromebook on to check the time, thinking it was mid-afternoon.

"11:57. odd."

so, i diddled online a little, somewhat thrown off by how untired i was, given how little i had slept, and how much walking i did. i called a doctor and left a message (odd. why were they closed at 2:00?) and was back asleep around 2:30, thinking i need to catch-up before i moved into the next segment of consciousness.

i wake up next and it's already dark out. did i sleep all afternoon? so, i check the chromebook and it's after 10:00, meaning i did indeed get the sleep i wanted. but, now it's cold in here and i'm having trouble waking up....i'm exhausted....

i post to the blog and hit refresh. it's after 1:00 on may 7th.

i instantly realized that my chromebook had been set to pacific time since this morning. so, i had slept a good five hours this morning, and another eight this evening.

i need to drag myself into the kitchen to eat, but i should be back to work soon.
ugh.

pseudo-science about cbd aside, this is a respiratory disease. don't smoke drugs as a prophylactic - unless you've already smoked yourself retarded.

https://calgaryherald.com/cannabis/cannabis-shows-promise-blocking-coronavirus-infection-alberta-researcher/

Wednesday, May 6, 2020

wow.

https://globalnews.ca/news/6912844/shopify-rbc-canada-company-coronavirus/
has the governor been to a grocery store recently?

https://www.cnbc.com/2020/05/06/ny-gov-cuomo-says-its-shocking-most-new-coronavirus-hospitalizations-are-people-staying-home.html
this was obvious.

https://www.cnbc.com/2020/05/05/the-coronavirus-mutated-and-appears-to-be-more-contagious-now-new-study-finds.html
the next thing for the swedes (who never developed widespread diagnostic testing, and are consequently very dramatically undercounting the number of cases) to do is some random antibody testing.
ok. i wanted to check my usage stats for yesterday before i put everything back together and it seems to be perfectly in order. great.

i've done laundry and showered and should be in and productive for the next two-three weeks.
the swedes will need to make sure they're keeping an eye on local outbreaks and keeping to contact tracing, moving forwards.
the most frustrating thing is that sweden just handed us our asses, and we're too stupid to even understand it.
we're going to need to wait for the numbers to come in.

but don't be surprised if canada ends up with many, many times more deaths per capita, in the end. 5x. 10x.
our authoritarian response may actually be having the effect of converting a flu-like illness into a serious pandemic, by maximizing the amount of damage it can do, by slowing it down.

as a result, the death rate in sweden may end up .05% or lower - and up to ten times that in places where the government is pushing down social distancing, which is 5x worse than my conceptual model.
https://dsdfghghfsdflgkfgkja.blogspot.com/2020/03/this-i-would-propose-is-better-way-to.html
how do you understand this apparent contradiction, where social distancing increases the number of deaths?

i posted this picture back on pi day:


if sweden followed the red curve, it saw an immediate spike, but should now see almost no deaths, as the virus is no longer being carried. that means there's still a lot of vulnerable people out there, but the virus is no longer finding their way to them.

everybody else followed the blue curve, which saw smaller number of deaths to start but, ultimately, higher levels of spread, due to lower immunity. this means that more vulnerable people - twice as many, according to the (conceptual) calculation of the area under the curve - are likely to end up sick and die.

i know this is counter-intuitive, but don't listen to me, look at the data.
so, are they peaking in sweden, then?

it looks like it...

and, that's what? around 3000 deaths? plus or minus?

if it burns out to a trickle over the next few days, there's not going to be any choice but to conclude they've reached something approaching functional immunity, at least in the active population, which could have the effect of largely burning it out, even if they still have to deal with small scale outbreaks for the next forever, like everybody else.

but, what is the damage?

if we calculate 3299 deaths in total out of a population of 10,501,043, that's .031415926% - which proves that this was the optimal strategy, after all.

at a herd immunity of 66.6%, which we have no idea is true or not, 10501043*.666*x = 3299 <---> x = .047%. so, that is your true death rate, which is equivalent to the flu.

no, stop - this is empirical. this is the best data we have. but, it does seem a little low....

the other hypothesis is that maybe herd immunity doesn't require two thirds of the population, but something less than that, and maybe the antibody data coming out of new york and elsewhere is grounds for that, as well.

so, what if herd immunity is actually achieved by this disease at 50% exposure? then the death rate becomes .063% - not a big jump.

what if it's 33%? then you're still barely getting at the .1% that i've been lowballing at.

but, let's get the point - the experiment in sweden seems to be winding down, and while the swedes themselves might be disappointed that it got into the old folks' homes (a problem that exists everywhere.), the data we're getting out of it is lowballing the lowballs.

you'd have to struggle to pull a .1% death rate out of these numbers.
well, what else can a kid do besides get you a beer, at least until they're old enough to learn how to read?
example...

"hey kid, get me a beer."

(pause)

"thanks, kid."
i'd just call the kid 'kid' until it figures it out.
don't do this.

the kid will hate you for it and just change it as soon as they can. i've seen it happen...

i have no intention to procreate, but, if i ever did, and i had anything to do with it, i'd insist on something like _____ as the official name. a placeholder.

that's essentially all they're really doing, anyways.

https://globalnews.ca/news/6905662/elon-musk-grimes-baby-name/
i was waiting for an update on this.

so, if all goes according to plan, i should have enough electricity credits saved up to get back to work very soonish.

https://news.ontario.ca/opo/en/2020/05/ontario-extends-electricity-rate-relief-during-covid-19.html
this is so far beneath any concept of contempt as to be impossible to actually believe.

jason kenney, you must resign immediately.

your reaction should be a difference of scale beyond outrage. and, if there was ever any doubt in your mind, there should not be - this perverse catastrophe must be permanently and thoroughly shut down.

https://thenarwhal.ca/alberta-suspends-19-oilsands-environmental-monitoring-requirements-coronavirus-concerns/
i can't even donate sperm, because i haven't been able to produce any for years.

you can have a hair follicle and take it to the lab. i don't care, just get them out of me...
"why don't you just stop taking them, then?"

because the amount of intellectual freedom that i've gained from emancipating myself from my sex drive is immeasurable. i don't want to go back to having this urge to masturbate all of the time, i hated it. my mind is now free for everything else that the world has to offer....

if the system is going to force me to choose, i'd rather live a short life in emancipation of sex than a long life in enslavement to it.

it would take minutes. it's not a strain on the system. they're not over-capacity. they are merely refusing service due to ideological reasons, and at the expense of their hippocratic oath - they are terrible doctors, and should be publicly berated for it.

but, what do i do?

i can't do anything...
an orchiectomy is a minor procedure that can be done within a few minutes in the office of the specialist. it requires arranging a trip home as walking may be difficult, but it doesn't require invasive surgery or a trip to the er.

costs are a few thousand dollars, which i'd rather spend on something i'm not covered for, but i need to get on with this and get off these pills.
i guess that, if the issue with the disease goes on long enough, i might in the end have the cash, and that might be what i have to do.
if i had the cash, i'd go to the states instead...
it's a perfect example of a backwards society, it really is - you go to see a doctor, and they talk to you about religion.

how did we get to this backwards place?
it's not frivolous, either.

1) given that i haven't used them in years and years, and i never want to use them again, they're really just a cancer risk. if i end up getting a tumour in there, can i hold them liable for refusing to treat me? it's just an empty, unused lump of tissue - it's a cancer risk.

2) the drugs that i take to reduce my testosterone levels to a functional near zero (which is on purpose. because i fucking hate testosterone.) are relatively hard on my liver. i've been on them for ten years, now, which is longer than anybody is supposed to be on them for. if i could get the testicles out, i could get off these drugs that are hard on my liver.

but, all that these fucking morons want to talk about is god.

fuck your stupid, imaginary, bullshit god....

how did they even become doctors?
it's one thing to say "you are 100% covered for this procedure".

it's another altogether to point out that 98% of the qualified doctors in a 500 km radius won't do it, all of them apparently citing religion as the reason they won't do it.
i don't understand why people second guess others on this.

if i go into a doctor's office and tell you point blank that i want you to take my testicles away, that's something i've thought about. frankly, i don't care about your opinion, and think you're a narcissistic asshole for even presenting one - i'm here to have them out, so just shut the fuck up and get rid of them.

this should be no hassle, no questions asked and more or less on demand.

it's baffling to me that i have to win an argument, first, and that the people i'm tasked with arguing with are largely disinterested in it.

it's not the system, here - this is covered.

but, the doctors here are all religious, and it's kind of putting me in a culture shock.

who'd have thought that the most substantive interaction with religion that i will ever have in my life comes in trying to convince a doctor to snip my testicles out? why do i have to lower myself to such stupidity?
let me try to get up to eat.

but, the other thing was with the doctor, today....

i went in today to rebook an appointment, because the line just rings when i call. i was told they're not booking until after covid-19 and i should come back later, which struck me as being runaround. i was told i could book by phone, but i can't reach them by phone, and, besides - the appointment is for a physical, which cannot and should not be done over the phone. anybody billing ohip for a "virtual physical" should be charged with fraud.

i offered to just rebook next year, and that was not met well. they told me to come back in a few weeks...

what i was concerned with was ensuring that i didn't lose my status as a patient, but that concern didn't seem to register with staff in a way that really rubbed me the wrong way.

so, am i potentially dealing with transphobic staff at the windsor family health centre? i don't know.

what i know is this: i deal with transphobia by rubbing my tits in your face. so, if they want to be stupid about it, i'll be happy to make a scene about it.

right now, i've decided to play stupid for a little while. i am awaiting results from this doctor on reassignment concerns (i am trying to get my testicles removed, and nobody seems to want to do it...), and i want to consider changing my hormones to prometrium.

i'm going to send them a fax about the issue...
the fact is that montreal did everything right. it was maybe slower than it should have been to crack down on the religious minorities, but that's not something unique to it.

expect toronto to be next - i said mid-to-late-may, and it seems like it may be in the latter category.

https://montrealgazette.com/news/local-news/swamped-montreal-hospitals-told-to-send-covid-19-patients-to-off-island-centres/

Tuesday, May 5, 2020

if i could only find a way to exist as an honest statistician, right?

you know what they say...
this is better than the vox article, which says something about the vox article given the place that maclean's holds in canadian journalism, but even normalizing at 50 is pretty sketchy.

canada is the biggest country in the world. germany is roughly the size of one of the atlantic provinces. so, just in terms of the probability of getting from zero to fifty without it taking off, you could have all the way up to fifty different isolated deaths in canada before you get to an epidemic in germany.

i know you have to do the graph somehow, and this is purposefully extreme, but it gets the idea across.

to start with, if you're going to compare small countries to canada, you should begin by looking at provinces, or even regions, rather than the whole country - but that's just a start. while germany isn't much bigger than new brunswick, the population density is also astronomically higher - another incredibly important factor.

it's going to be hard to do this right until this is done, and until then the data is going to reflect the biases of the person that plotted it.

https://www.macleans.ca/society/health/coronavirus-deaths-these-charts-show-how-canada-compares-with-the-world/
so, i got the things i need done for the next roughly two weeks. i can now gorge myself and rest my weary body, after nine hours of walking and hauling around groceries.

i didn't go out on day one and buy out the store, but i've been slowly building up supplies of things over what is now two months of hermitting. yes, there's the four packages of toilet paper, but i actually would normally have two-three on hand anyways. i'm actually lower on pasta than usual; under normal circumstances, i like to have about 36 days worth in tupperware.

hey, i've been in the situation of it being the first of the month and trying to figure something out. it's easier if there's already food, so i don't fuck around when it comes to that - there's certain things i keep a surplus of, and some of it is dwindling more than i'd like. i should be ok for the rest of the month at least, before i crack and have to buy some of that cracked-out pasta, you know the kind with the weird swirls and shit, like it's trying to find an algebraic solution to your mother in law's nasty cooking, but is instead just spiraling out on means that it thought were golden, but are merely just pasty brown.

anyways.

i've now slowly squirreled away oddities such as four tubes of toothpaste, an entire fridge door worth of block cheese, three red hot sauces, three cans of coffee and who knows what else shuffled away on to the side. let us hope that this is the last nine hour day; let's hope i can just sneak out for some tomatoes, moving forward. my legs can only handle so much...

these days, though, are such total body exercises, they really are - you're walking, you're lifting, you're hauling for miles. you feel it in your calves, but this has to be hitting you everywhere. which is fine - i don't want to build muscle, but i'm happy to tone what i've got.

i need, however, to inform you that this whole "social distancing" thing is a charade. it is - it's absurd. whatever the merits of it's intentions were, what actually exists, what is really existing social distancing, is just nonsense, unfit to even display the label of whatever delusion, whatever pseudo-science, that may have birthed it.

you will begin this charade outside of the store, where people will smoke various things, while talking loudly to themselves, rarely more than a few inches from each other. if you have the audacity to inch ahead of them, they will take it as an invitation to move ahead in line, entirely oblivious as to why they're outside in the fucking first place. and, who are these people, exactly? my experience today was to be stuck in line between two absolutely hideously disgusting bearded men who were essentially transiting toilets on their faces not once but twice, none of whom seemed to understand basic personal space by somebody that was visibly disgusted by them, let alone what social distancing was or why they were outside. one of them repeatedly spat through his beard while standing in line.

under normal circumstances, i would not have gone within ten feet of these people, let alone six. but, because of the rules, i was forced against my will to stand in line with them for a period of time i would generally not have tolerated. i repeatedly felt more in danger of getting sick standing in line than i did once i was in the store, in addition to needing to suppress the need to vomit for being forced to tolerate them. yuck.

then, once you're in the store, nobody even cares anymore. people walk by each other, cough all over each other, make like bad zeppelin records and go down the wrong aisle, etc. you think you're in line for a real tight-ass establishment, but you get inside and it's like an insane class posse show.

they've got these plexi-glass windows installed to try to create a spit barrier, and it's maybe the most grounded idea i've seen yet, but it's like the cone of silence - the cashiers can't hear anything behind them, so they just poke their heads over to talk to you, as you're keying in your atm number on the device that thousands of people had already used just that day.

and, then, you're off to leave your cart with the attendant, who touches every single one of them when he sanitizes them entirely haphazardly, between smoke breaks.

a charade.

it's all it is.

get ready for this thing, canada. your puny social distancing does nothing.
don't be confused - this is what they want.

https://globalnews.ca/news/6905295/coronavirus-china-hostility-report/
you need to be looking at death rates, not case counts.

the case counts are completely worthless.
the reason that canada has fewer cases is that we're undertesting - particularly in ontario.
this is absolute nonsense.

we're about a month behind the united states in terms of the epidemic curve, and we have roughly 10% of the population. so, if we were exactly on par with the united states, we'd have something less than 7,000 deaths. there's currently around 4,000.

i would expect 20,000 deaths in canada minimum by the time this is done.

https://www.vox.com/2020/5/4/21242750/coronavirus-covid-19-united-states-canada-trump-trudeau
in the end, we might learn this is a counter-intuitive consequence of something called sudden stratospheric warming, which is at least consistent, even if the outcome is confusing.

that would be the case where it's essentially bad luck, and it may be good news in the long run.
it could be that what is happening with the polar vortex is some ramification of a changed climate interacting with an increased level of sunlight. it is possible that it's actually breaking up and we're essentially seeing chunks of it fall off.

or, this might be less unusual than we think it is.

what's clear is that it isn't entirely clear, and that there isn't any reason to think it's permanent.
so, why are we dealing with record-breaking cold in canada, when the rest of the world is dealing with extreme heat, and the hottest year on record?

it's not cold in sweden or russia. it's only cold here.

we were at the bottom of the solar cycle, which was skewing the weather. anthropogenic climate change doesn't change the solar cycle - that still happens, for better or worse. as we are getting out of that funk, we should expect these extremes to reverse and the warming to reassert itself, but this is the worst spring yet, and nobody saw that coming.

i kept saying that it looked good but it was too early and may have, in the end, jumped the gun a little.

still - why is it twenty-thirty degrees below normal here? is the pole wandering, or what?

when the solar cycle picks up, you should expect a more intense polar vortex; let's remember that the cause of the polar vortex expanding is an absence of sunlight, so it does follow that when you bring in more sunlight you should bottle it back up, which is what it looked like was happening for most of the winter. but, then, it just kind of imploded...

it's not expanding - it's even warm in nunavut. it's only cold right here.

so, did the culmination of factors kind of break it, then? like if you spin a top too fast and it runs off the axis?

if so, is that the end of our polar vortex? hmm. stay tuned...

note: it could just be bad luck.

this is weird, no doubt. everything right now is kind of weird. but, my analysis has not changed - you should continue to expect an acceleration of warming in this region as the sun comes back, even if it takes a while to kick in.
the aura has been threatening me this morning, but has not crashed my consciousness. let us hope i can exist free of it for the rest of the day.
i got the sleep i needed, and i was feeling better until a few seconds ago.

is the migraine coming back again? i dunno.

let me try to get some cleaning done in here and go from there.
actually, i'd say you're looking at at least 200,000 deaths in the united states as a best case scenario, with potentially as many as a million.

but, i don't think these hippie measures are grounded in science - that's just herd immunity.

i'm not arguing against the fascist lockdowns because i think the economy is more important than health, i'm pointing out that there's no reasonable expectation that they're going to work, and presenting you with a more realistic and, what i think is inevitable, number, instead.

we need to get away from this idea that we're in control; we're not, and, if there's anything positive that comes out of this, let us hope that it is a tendency to relinquish control more readily to science, to logic and to randomness.

maybe this will act as our collective exit from the era of classical science and into the era of modern science, where we no longer pretend we are at the top of some kind of hierarchy, or that we are here to protect the earth, as we have since the days of aristotle, but instead understand our need to see ourselves as equal with the other life forms on this planet, in a web rather than a chain, and in a relationship of mutual need rather than one of dominance or extraction. this is a myth that the science has let go of, but that the culture trails behind on, often reinforced by a religion that crowns us as special, as different.

we're not special. we're not different....

this shift in mindset away from anthropic dominance and towards a concept of ecological interdependence is necessary if we wish to survive the rest of the century. it will be resisted, but such resistance is futile; the other option is extinction.

there's a lot more people that are going to die from this, and there's nothing that can be done or could have been done or even should have been done about it.

it's too late to do the things we could have done that would have mattered.

Monday, May 4, 2020

see, this is what i was yelling for people to do.

a total society-wide lockdown is ridiculous, utopian, unworkable. but, a couple of dozen people in a home is feasible, and exactly the most vulnerable population.

if all of the care homes and facilities had taken this measure, we would have been able to avoid a broader social lockdown, which doesn't appear to have been successful, and actually succeeded at protecting the people that actually required it.

this facility should be studied as a model and our future health responses should be centered around the lessons learned.

but, i suspect that those lessons are not particularly complex.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/france-vilanova-nursing-home-1.5554296
there's never been a clear answer for high schools and universities, and it might not even be clear if they should open in the fall.

but, elementary schools should have never closed in the first place.
the issue with the school was always the older professors, not the kids. but, when people refuse to listen to the science, they refuse to listen to the science; when they give in to fear, it's hard to reason with them.
yeah, that's because he's an idiot.

https://globalnews.ca/news/6901114/trudeau-quebec-coronavirus-schools/
that migraine was really vicious....

i'm in for the day, and maybe a little longer.

i'm going to have to sleep this afternoon, whether i like it or not.
so, these are the newest antibody numbers from new york, on saturday:

Bronx: 27.6%
Brooklyn: 19.2%
Manhattan: 17.3%
Queens: 18.4%
Staten Island: 19.2%

still no error bars, but the sample sizes in specific boroughs are much lower, so you could potentially add an extra 10% to any of those numbers (or remove as much).

those numbers are still lower than i expected, but it's high.

and, the decrease in transmission is no doubt resulting from increased presence of antibodies, at least partially.

note now that it seems as though an american firm is pushing an antibody test, so expect the msm to turn on a dime with this. they're terrible. consistently. but, we'll see if the yankee tests are as good as the other ones, now. i would hardly expect substantively different results, but we'll see.

the caveat from the start was always mutations and different strains. if there are multiple viruses going around rather than just one, which appears to be the case, then you would expect the tests to miss the infections that they weren't created for. further, you would expect a possibility of catching the various different stains, because they are no longer the same virus.

the mutation rate of this thing appears to be continually being revised upwards, meaning that these numbers might only be a half or a third of the story.

how do we find that out?

the answer is that we do more antibody testing.
are they peaking in montreal?

i'd hold off on that...i suspect it will be sooner than toronto, but i'm not there, yet.
lol.

dumb hippies.

(this is quebec)

ok.

it looks like the detroit area, which was earlier than other places, has finally come close to peaking. the numbers in detroit are not as clean as new york, apparently because the reporting is not as centralized, as opposed to in ontario where they're just being flat out fucked with. but, it looks like it peaked a few days ago, meaning that the city is probably dealing with high levels of immunity at this point.

due to the fragmented data, it's hard to tell if it went up and down or flattened out, but the former looks more real.

that said, it looks like it's spreading into places like flint, lansing and ann arbor, now. the same thing happened in new york, with a delayed outbreak in buffalo.

here in windsor, the initial infections seem to have actually been a corollary of the detroit outbreak, rather than it's own. as we are much smaller, and relatively isolated, we should not expect a serious outbreak until the tail end of this, which probably won't be a "second wave" but just the result of the first one playing out. we're more like a city like thunder bay - we're likely to be last, not first.

and, let's hope it doesn't get too bad in toronto and los angeles this week, although it doesn't look like a peak in either city is likely for another two-three weeks.
i've got a nasty headache still, but i'm a lot better.

i don't want to sit in bed, i wanted to do things today....
let's hope our leaders never sink to such depravity as that.
that video that they posted is offensive and disgusting.
china is a known unknown.

you don't know; don't pretend you do.
and, just on the question of the "reintroduction" of the virus in china.

they claim it was gone for what? three days?

they're doing exactly the same thing we're doing, which is blame the problem on foreigners.

given that they are never transparent about anything, it's impossible to know whether the virus was eradicated and brought back or if there was community spread the whole time, but you'll note the extreme measures they took, and that they don't appear to have been effective, in the long run - as they would not have been expected to be.

the chinese response has been to go so far as to ridicule the concept of human rights, which is deeply disturbing. i've been calling them fascists; they're not helping themselves, and they don't seem to grasp it.

but, the proper lesson here is that the east asian model has, in fact, failed.

except in south korea. that's still weird...
https://deathtokoalas.blogspot.com/2013/11/this-is-horribly-morbid.html
the virus showed up in china and spread quickly to iran, before transiting to italy, where it seems to have mutated.

china. iran. right.

well....?

recognize that this isn't mutually exclusive, either. do the chinese even have the capability to bioengineer something like this? i'd doubt it, frankly. but, the strain that showed up in italy could very well have been retaliatory.

i don't know exactly how you'd prove a virus was or was not engineered in a lab without explicit evidence - scientists admitting it. if we start seeing very weird behaviour, it may tip something off, but it isn't proof.

stated in sciencey terms, the hypothesis isn't falsifiable. so, it's not actually science.

but, i'd be far more likely to blame it on the pentagon than the chinese....
so, a few weeks ago they were insisting they could prove it wasn't man-made, which i insisted was absurd. but, the only real evidence that i could find that it was man-made was the insistence that it wasn't.

now, the secretary of state is insisting it was made in a lab after all - and that the chinese did it.

again: these projections are very strongly suggestive of an american origin. we've seen this over and over again, most recently when the cia rigged the 2016 election and blamed it on the russians.

so, did the americans create this virus and accidentally set it loose? did it blow back spectacularly badly?

https://nationalpost.com/news/world/pompeo-says-significant-evidence-new-coronavirus-emerged-from-chinese-lab-2
this has been a recurrent problem for years now, and it's a normal side effect of the worst type of migraines. the technical term is called "migraine with aura", because you get tracers, like you're on psychedelics. but, i could even deal with that if it wasn't for the blurred vision and, worse, the aphasia. it's the aphasia that is frightening and frustrating...

i have very, very low cholesterol. and, while my migraines tend to be hemiplegic, i don't think i'm having a stroke. it's just what is perhaps the absolute worst type of migraine.

what was it like trying to type this morning? i could think relatively well, but i had a very hard time typing the actual words, and if you look at the writing you can see that the words are replaced with other words. compare the original version with the correct one to see some of the concepts that got distorted and how they got distorted.

i'm not going to pretend that i fully understand this, but it is absolutely bizarre, and it hits you like a vicious attack that you just have to shake off.

i was considering doing some things today, but i think i may have to recover, instead. this headache was not the worst i've had (i could at least talk. i've had some where i try to say specific words and say unrelated things. so, i'll try to say 'dog' and instead say 'hyena', or something - and i can't get the right idea out), but it was pretty vicious nonetheless and it might last two or three days.

i've talked to some doctors, and they tell me they're just really bad headaches. there's no answer...

https://migraine.com/blog/migraine-symptoms-transient-aphasia/
ok, can i think straight yet?

====

ok.

so, i ended up with a brutal headache in here a little before 3:00, and it could be a while before i'm finished with it. i may have a hard time shaking it off for a little while. it's the dry air in here, and if i'm stuck inside all summer, i could end up fighting with it for months.

the guy upstairs thinks he gets migraines because of the humidity, which is maybe the most scientifically illiterate thing i've ever heard. but, i've noticed this before - as soon as he gets in, he turns the dehumidifer on, which gives me a headache, too. so, we both end up with headaches because he won't turn the fucking dehumidifier off.

like, i can't even think. it's like i have a vice squeezing my brain; it's a tension headache, and just vicious. i can't see, i can barely talk, it's just brutal. what he should be doing is the opposite - he should be turning the dry air off, and turning on the humidifier instead. we need more humidity, not less! i can't stand the dry air, it gives me a headache and just makes me horribly sick.

ok.

i can't type....clearly.....

i'll be back in a bit.

the problem is the lack of humidity.

but, i'm done the master document.

===============

so, i cleaned that segment up, now, and i'm still hurting, but i seem to be much better.

i feel awful, but i'm not sick from the virus - it's the dry air. i haven't been outside at all since april 16th.

is it the vitamin d? no. it's the dry air...

my immediate concern is that i need to eat this morning.

but, i am done the master document. really. it's roughly 250 pages, and mostly music stuff....

just let me shake this off a bit more.
ok.

so, i ended up with a brutal headache end here a little before 3:00, and i could be a while before i finish with it. i may have a hard time shaking it off for a little while. up stairs the try air end here, and i if i end up here stuck in here all find, here it's care until an empty little winter.

the guy upstairs thinks he gets migraines because of the humidity, which is maybe the most scientifically illiterate thing i've heard. but, i've notice this before - as soon as he gets up, he turn the dehumidifer end, on which gives me a headache, too. so, we both end up with headaches because he wouldn't dd the fucking dehumidifier off.

like, i couldn't even think he's sorry here. what he should be doing is the opposite - he should be turning the dry air off, and doing on the humidifier instead. i can't stand the dry air, it gives me a headache and up makes up send.

ok.

i end can't type....clearly.....

i'll be back in a bit.

the probably is the humidity.

but, i'm done the master document.
i got distracted this morning by some censorship on facebook.

it was back in late february or early march that facebook decided to put a "cover" over this album art, which i found to be an unacceptable restriction of speech:


their argument was that they'd decided this had "graphic or violent content" and people should decide whether they wanted to look at it.

but, how can people make a choice to decide if they want to see something if they haven't seen it? it's incoherent, circular logic. you have to see something before you decide you don't like it. so, this decision is not being made by individual people, but rather by facebook.

the value of this picture, as art, is that it is disturbing.

what is it even of? this crocodillian ate some human, and is being cut open to identify the body. that's a fact of life, as human predation is a real concern in much of the world where humans co-exist with this species. facebook's decision to cover up the picture is equivalent to a denial of reality, which they're then using to censor the art - which is the feeling of discomfort that you get from looking at this, as a reminder that your humanity is rooted in the fact that you are an animal.

do i think you have the right to avoid that? no...

you might disagree with it, but you cannot be allowed to tell me to cover up.

so, i got into a posting war with facebook over it, and they seem to have conceded the point, but only on my main profile. as i went through the music profile, i realized i'd have to repost several posts that made use of the picture, which meant i'd have to scroll through hundreds of posts....

i then forced myself to sleep this afternoon, which took a few tries - which is a good sign. when i am healthy, i have difficulty sleeping. i thrive on insomnia; bring it on.

i need to finish up what i was doing this morning, before i put the completed master document aside to do dishes and get something to eat.
wake me up when capitalism is done and we've found a way to indefinitely prolong mortality via shifting hosts.

when this shell is no longer functional, just download me to disk, grow me a new one and upload me into it.

existence is futile, until then.

https://biotron.wisc.edu/2018/10/26/human-powers-of-hibernation-may-be-dormant-in-genetic-code/

Sunday, May 3, 2020

i'm not starving myself.

it's just conservation of energy - if i expend less energy, i'll need to consume less, too.

and, i'm healthy enough that my body can tell me that, and i can hear it, and i'm able to listen.
and, why don't i go out and do something?

i like concerts, but that's really the only thing that has ever succeeded in getting me out of the house.

even in the best of times, i've never been an outside person - i've always preferred staying inside with technology, enough that i should watch the vitamin d, myself.

will get some fresh air when i need to get groceries.

but, i'd rather sit in the dark and listen to gothic music than go outside and play in the sun - that's been true my whole life.
the sun is coming up, and i just finished consolidating everything for the master document from the laptop's drive.

there is one further step, and it requires making sure everything already posted to the internet is already in the document - facebook, partial rebuilds, etc.

i'm going to stop to eat, and i'm overdue. as i haven't been expending much energy, i haven't been eating much. so, i've gone from being a few days ahead of schedule last month to being three days behind schedule, this month.

that's ok; if i end up a week or more behind, i'll just scratch it off.

i mentioned once before that it is highly likely that i will eat a lot less than normal if i'm stuck inside for the next several months.
alright, so the html files are done.

next, i need to add facebook posts and whatnot.

this might be done by sunrise.

Saturday, May 2, 2020

again: stop protesting.

just go live.

do you need the government to tell you what you are and aren't allowed to do? really?

https://globalnews.ca/news/6897862/doug-ford-2nd-anti-shutdown-protest-toronto/
so, i slept on how to get these live links into the master document....

i only have 36 html files, all dated to the last days of the month. each file has a handful of links in it...

so, rather than throw everything back into flux by installing to the 90s laptop, it makes more sense to just edit the html files in notepad and then copy them over.

hopefully, these problems with my access terminal will be resolved within a few weeks. it really relies on being able to get a workable reimaging process in place.

once i get the links in these files hardcoded, and the files copied into the master document, i'll be done processing all of the files on my external drive for the month of 01/14. there will still be a few things left, but that will be the crux of it, and i can get to the rebuild.

i'm going to have to get some groceries, eventually.
so, snap out of it.

all you've ever gotten from doug ford is a constant stream of steady bullshit, it's all you're getting from him now and it's all you'll ever get from him in the future - because that's what he does, he bullshits.
you have to wonder.

if you could put him in some sort of squeeze device, and just compress his fat ass, would shit come out of his mouth?
if you can send me a link to a press conference where doug ford isn't talking out of his ass, a situation where he isn't blatantly bullshitting, i will buy you a beer when this is done.

i suspect it's never happened.

so, we need to consider the source when he speaks.

it's just bullshit after more bullshit after more bullshit....
he's head bullshitter.

we need to wise up, ontario.
every word out of doug ford's mouth is just a steady stream of complete bullshit - just like it has been for years and years.

he's only capable of doing one thing, and it's bullshitting people.

nothing's changed - it's bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.
we have no idea what's going on here at all.
i don't want hope and bullshit.

i want facts and data.
when your leaders lie to you, withhold the facts, and talk down to you like you're children, you do not live in a free society - you are cattle, you are enslaved.

everything that doug ford says is the opposite of reality, but that was true before this started, wasn't it?

we need to build immunity faster, or we're going to be enslaved forever. if you want this to end sooner, then get out there and spread this faster.

https://toronto.ctvnews.ca/ontario-premier-says-province-will-open-sooner-than-thought-if-physical-distancing-continues-1.4922022
let's get a nap in first.
fwiw, i sent something to my isp a few days ago regarding the listener, and the stats magically snapped back into place as a result of it.

what that tells me is that the isp is working with the cops.
saving it locally didn't work, and it shouldn't have.

i'm going to have to get 2003 up on the 90s laptop...this is so annoying...
so, now i'm running up against what i knew would end up being a major annoyance, and i don't know how i'm going to deal with.

i need to find a way to copy data from the internet into a word document that i can read via word 2003. and, yes - i need to be able to do it via word 2003, because every other version of word is absolutely horrible. but, more specifically, the xml formatting is unworkable. it will break the document - i need to find ways to get around it. i cannot upgrade. i cannot convert. i have to get the data into 2003.

i can't use google docs, and i can't use microsoft's cloud - they both insist on the xml architecture. i can't install word 2003 on this chromebook, either.

the major annoyance is this chrome os, which is useless for doing anything other than browsing the internet, or very lightweight cloud purposes. and, that's fine - it's all it was intended to do in the first place. i'm just in a limbo until i can fix my laptop properly by building a winlited image for it that i can reinstall on demand when the cops hack into it.

i could perhaps try to save things over html and copy them over with a usb key, but i don't actually think that's going to give me the formatting i want.

what i might have to do is install word on the 90s laptop (which is running xp) and then copy over the formatting into the doc file, and then move it back.

why don't any of the clouds offer 2003 support? i don't know. but, they don't...so i'm stuck....

yeah. these are really my only two options.

it has to do with the way i coded the website. if i launch the files locally, and copy them into the master document, the links will be local. if i want the links to actually go out to the appspot site, i need to copy them directly over from the live site.
i'm making some progress here on this master document finally.

i'm starting to come to terms with the reality that i'm going to spend this summer inside by myself, and i'm ok with it.

i'm behind on everything, and i'm not getting younger, so let's hope i get a lot of work done - let's hope that the beginning of this month is a major pivot into taking a good chunk out of finishing up period 3 (2003-2007).
so, no - i don't oppose a ban on guns.

but, it won't help...

what would help is banning religion, and you can't do that by force, you need a social revolution.
so, you keep blaming this on guns...

the actual problem is religion.

you can ban guns all you want, but so long as you still have religion, you're going to have patriarchy, and you're going to have dominance and control and violence.
we need to look at stuff like this, not bans on weapons:

https://www.government.se/49b730/contentassets/87a9c5e22af14395aff3411dbd197f58/patriarchal-violence---an-attack-on-human-security
and, i would reiterate the point i've been making for a long time now: if you want to get to the causes of gun violence, and actually put an end to it, you need to look at ways to abolish patriarchy and the institutions that uphold it, not ways to ban guns.
i don't really expect that banning guns is going to have much of an effect on the prevalence of violent crime. as is often the case, the issue in nova scotia appears to have been about patriarchy, rather than about guns. so, it doesn't really get to the root causes.

but, i don't have any particular opposition to banning guns, either.

so, i mean, do this if you want - i don't really care. but, if we're standing here in five years and still dealing with exactly the same problems, don't say nobody told you that it wouldn't make any difference.
it's not clear if these 11 strains are the same 11 strains as in the phantom indian preprint, but this article discusses the same question of differences in virulence in the various strains that are developing - and concludes that we are dealing with multiple viruses.

https://blogs.sciencemag.org/pipeline/archives/2020/04/21/watching-for-mutations-in-the-coronavirus
this is our history.

we should stop running from it and embrace it.

https://www.cgai.ca/searching_for_a_middle_power_role_in_a_new_world_order
i don't tend to pick sides in general, and i'm not going to pick sides, now.
you should expect me to be broadly critical of all sides, if the data justifies the criticism.

i'm not going to hold back.

now, understand this - my position here is that truth is paramount. you can't build solidarity on lies, and friendship isn't real if it's based in falsehoods.

but, you should realize this as well - if somebody will not criticize you when you're wrong, then they aren't really your friend, either. that's a key aspect of what friendship actually is.
no, i don't want to pick sides in a nationalist debate between the fascists in china and the capitalists in america. canada's self-interest is not served by either entity.

our focus should be in building and nurturing a non-alignment movement that allow us to maintain sovereignty as a middle power.
this archive is a little behind, as well.

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/journals/1431/
the article i'm looking for should probably be here, but isn't yet.

the cited researchers appear to be real people, at least.

*shrug*

https://ijmr.icmr.org.in/ijmr/aheadofprint.aspx

Friday, May 1, 2020

i support this individual's rights to wear what they want, when they want, regardless of whether it upsets people or not.

i hope they look the cops in the eye, point blank, and tell them to fuck off.

and, i would suggest to the police in the area that they surely have better things to do than this.

https://nypost.com/2020/04/30/cops-hunt-person-wearing-creepy-17th-century-plague-doctor-costume/
there's some more information on this study here, which i can't find.

https://www.firstpost.com/health/study-claims-there-are-11-strains-of-sars-cov-2-heres-how-viruses-mutate-8309091.html
punks have been arguing for decades that these dumb hippies will be the fucking death of us all.

here we are....
if there's 11 different strains, do you need 11 different vaccines?

not necessarily. but, the vaccine would need to account for all 11 strains to actually be halfways effective - as well as continually evolving strains.

it would, however, mean that you could potentially catch it 11 different times - and that antibody tests likely only test for one or maybe a few strains.

do you see the futility of what we're doing, yet?
as stated previously, the more that trump argues that the virus was created by the chinese military, the more likely it is that it was created by the pentagon.

we've seen this repeatedly, now - the more vicious their projections are, the more guilty they are.
i again need to ask - what kind of effect has imperfect distancing (inevitable in a free society) had on the virus' evolution?

consider three scenarios. this is what einstein would call a 'thought experiment', meaning it's valid in abstraction, but you need to collect data to see if it's real or not.

1) scenario a is where you have no social distancing at all. in such a scenario, you would have no selective pressure on the virus to jump over large physical distances (via aerosols, or over surfaces). so, it is less likely that the virus would evolve to be more easily transmissible over wider physical distances, and the most widespread strains of the virus would be the least virulent ones.

2) scenario b is imperfect social distancing, where you might have people standing just close enough that transmission is barely possible, and you might have places (like debit machines) that almost everybody in a specific region touches with their hands, after or before touching their faces, without even being cognizant of it. this would create very strong selective pressures for the virus to mutate to become more transmissible. in scenario b, the most widespread strains of the virus would also be the most virulent.

3) scenario c is perfect social distancing, where a complete lack of transmission actually kills the virus off.

it doesn't take a dialectic to realize that scenario b is the most likely one when distancing rules are implemented in a free society. in the long run, that might be worse than scenario a. scenario c would be considered to be utopian and unrealistic.

if i understand correctly, this study is suggesting that the strain out of china was many times less transmissible than the strain that is dominant, now, and developed outside of the country - perhaps as a result of selective pressures created by distancing.

this should be a stark warning for future tactics.

viruses evolve.

https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/mumbai/virus-has-mutated-into-10-types-one-now-dominant-across-regions-study/articleshow/75417399.cms
right when i was about to get started early this morning, i ended up with a migraine. i may have triggered it by not eating...and then eating...

i tried to shake it off a few times, but it doesn't work like that - you have to sleep. so, i slept for essentially the entire calendar date.

the type of migraines i've been getting since i moved here come with auras, meaning you can't do anything when they click in, too. you can't even read because you can't see. you're just stuck.

i don't know if i'm up yet.
i'd rather make an uncoerced choice that is wrong than be a slave and do what i'm told and be right.
and, then, in the end, i'm not going to fault myself for not listening to bad logic based on authority - i'm going to call for your head for lying to me and everybody else.
"you just need to put your faith in experts and do what you're told!"

no. that's called fascism...

in a democracy, we consult experts for their views but we ultimately analyze data independently and then make decisions together.

if you withhold information, or give me bad data, and then tell me to do things that don't make sense because you didn't give me information, then i'm going to ignore you and make the wrong choice based on the deficit of information - and i'll keep doing it, too.

the right answer is not to tell me to listen, it's to give me useful data.
so, they couldn't get them from china and made them themselves.

based on what strain, though?

https://abcnews.go.com/International/crucial-coronavirus-antibody-tests-destined-york-city-caught/story?id=70199489
so, yes - if there are multiple strains of this virus going around, as appears to be the case, then an antibody test would only be useful in testing for one strain, and would not provide immunity for the rest of them.

that was the situation we wanted to avoid, but may have been the truth from the start.
if governments want citizens to trust them, they need to stop lying to them as a starting point.
it would be very useful if the various authorities would be more transparent so that people can make more informed decisions based on more reliable data.

i don't want to be talked down to to prevent me from panicking.

i'm not going to mindlessly do what i'm told.

if you present me with nonsense (like the idea that antibodies don't provide immunity), i'm going to criticize it; if it turns out that you told me that because you were trying to obfuscate the truth because you didn't want me to overreact, then that was exceedingly bad governance, because i didn't take you on authority, i ignored you for being absurd.

you should have been honest in the first place.
if there's multiple viruses, antibody testing would also indeed be unreliable - in the sense that you're only testing for one virus. and, you could look at that either way...

are these antibody tests being based on chinese data or european data? i know that a lot of the kits came from china.

if we're testing for the chinese virus in new york, and find that 30% of the people tested have antibodies, that is an intriguing result, but may ultimately have little to do with the outbreak that occurred, which was in the european virus. i've been scratching my head wondering why the numbers are so low. it could be that they're testing for the wrong virus, and that an antibody test for the european strain would produce even higher antibody prevalence.
i know this is a flurry of information. for me, it's confirming a lot of things i already realized. for you, it could be alarming and concerning.

the more information i see, the more unlikely it seems to me that any sort of lockdown is ever going to be remotely effective.

we're going to have to learn to live with this.

the new normal cannot be fascism.

the new normal is co-existence with the virus.
if we have different strains in circulation already, that answers the question as to how some people could get "reinfected" - they've come into contact with multiple strains.

there were only ever two answers to this question - either the testing was in error, or the virus has mutated. it could be a little of both.

but, if there are actually two or more viruses out there and not just one, that's also a big concern for vaccine testing...

if we're basing our vaccines on chinese data, it might not work on the european strain, which appears to be far worse.
this preprint article is arguing that the strains are showing the potential for dramatic differences in mortality rates - indicating that the virus that showed up in italy and traveled to new york may be much deadlier than the one that came to the west coast from china.

and, that may be a kind of epiphany in analyzing the data.

https://www.medrxiv.org/content/10.1101/2020.04.14.20060160v1.full.pdf
it's an open - but important - question as to whether there are differences in mortality associated with these different strains, which are already building up quickly.

giving people drugs that you know are going to increase the mutation rate even further is playing russian roulette - it's true the most mutations are not beneficial, but this is a numbers game, in the end. the more mutations you create, the more likely it is that you get one that works.

the threat of prescribing this drug and accidentally creating a superstrain out of it should not be underestimated.

https://translational-medicine.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12967-020-02344-6
re: remdesivir.

this is the drug that was widely touted as a way to fight ebola and ultimately didn't work. thankfully, we have an ebola vaccine, now. so, my best guess is that they're essentially trying to find a way to profit off of a waste product; the idea of the fda approving this for covid-19 appears to be driven by capitalism, rather than science.

but, i remember there being concerns about this drug not only not working in disrupting rna replication, but it actually leading to mutations in translation. if you think about it, that actually makes sense - if you're trying to interfere with replication, and you don't actually succeed in stopping it, you're probably going to at least succeed in messing with it. this is very bad, in context.

the claim with ebola was that the mutations were not beneficial, so it didn't matter anyways. but, that sounds more like good luck than predictive science.

the primary thing we should be concerned about right now is preventing mutations - that's why there needs to be so much testing. approving a drug that doesn't actually work and may instead increase the mutation rate is the absolute worst thing that could be done.

now, as was the case with the hydrocholoroquine, maybe there's some other reasoning behind this that will clarify itself in time.

but, given that this drug has not worked well in the past, my primary concern would be about it's effect on the mutation rate - that is a potential disaster in the making.
again: i don't know exactly what the chiefs want.

but, if it's something like the nisga'a agreement, which is what it sounds like, then that's a major step forwards.

they needed a treaty first, then they can talk about signing contracts with oil companies - which i will oppose, regardless.

https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/wetsuweten-pact-hereditary-chiefs-onboard-but-elected-chiefs-now-rescind-approval
"that's socialism!"

touche.
further, people that repeatedly try to get into the hospital via the back door are going to inevitably end up getting banned from the hospital altogether, due to their antisocial behaviour - and that's the right thing to do, in context.
no, the hospital analogy is almost perfect.

suppose somebody found a way in through the back door of a hospital and snuck into an empty room. when discovered, what would happen?

the doctor would no doubt make a snap triage decision; if they had a knife in their neck or something, then, yeah, they'd need to be dealt with first. otherwise, they're going to receive a warning not to do that again, and be escorted back to the waiting room - meaning they're going to have to wait even longer than they would have if they just did it right in the first place.

all i'm really saying is that we should be properly triaging refugees, which means bringing them back to the waiting room when they sneak into the country via the back door.

.....and, that is a fundamentally egalitarian and inherently left-wing position.
to somebody like chrystia freeland, an independent analysis is merely second-guessing and distorting the narrative.

the state defines what is real, and what isn't - and anybody challenging it is a terrorist.
they don't want independent analysis.

they want you to obsequiously shut up and do what you're told.
so, i do suspect that the death rate is climbing at a much higher rate than is being reported.

and, i do know that they're undertesting, by all appearances on purpose.

but, i can't make up numbers. they'll have to come out in the wash...

all i can do is point to the delays, and explain that they're making the officially reported numbers entirely useless to analyze - and that it seems to be intentional.
say what you want about new york, but they were honest and transparent in their briefings. they stood up and reported awful numbers with no apparent attempt to sugar coat or distort them, and they deserve respect for that.

we're just not getting that kind of honesty from our politicians, here.
it seems like the government doesn't want the kind of curve we saw come out of new york to be broadcast - they'd rather that our numbers look like an authoritarian state, because they are, at heart, a bunch of fascists.

so, they're delaying reporting the deaths in order to manipulate the curve.

there's apparently over 20,000 tests in the backlog in ontario, alone.
karl rove told us that it doesn't matter what is true, it matters what people think is true.

chrystia freeland seems to have updated this: reality isn't what is important, it's the projection of "reality" over twitter that is.
this government seems to be more concerned about it's international reputation than it is in the lives of it's own citizens.

so, it's manipulating it's presentation to conform to expectations erected via social media; they want to broadcast the message that we're succeeding in "flattening the curve", because that's the metric that twitter users are using, however daft it is. and, while they may not be good at understanding reality, they seem to at least be good at understanding twitterspeak.

the convictions of hyper-honest mathematicians aside, in the end, the numbers are going to need to add up. so, this seems foolish - but that's normal, from this government. and, all we can do is sit and wait.
i need to reiterate that the number of cases being reported by the authorities in canada is entirely worthless information, as it's being intentionally skewed to try to fabricate a "flattening" of the curve. doug ford and chrystia freeland appear to be colluding to essentially falsify the data, via delays and undertesting.

to our governments in canada at both levels, this appears to be more of a public relations issue than a public health issue.

as a consequence, i've been relying more on the mortality statistics, but there are reports coming out that this information is also being distorted via intentional delaying.

if my role is to try to provide an independent analysis in order to keep the government honest, i need reliable statistics to begin with. if i cannot get them, my only meaningful analysis is to point the issue out.

so, all i can do is point out that the mortality rates in ontario are currently unreliable, and that it's consequently not entirely clear how things are progressing. 

cuomo's daily briefings were refreshing in their clarity and transparency, and it maybe set a high bar and put down unrealistic expectations that are not being met in canada. 

it seems like the issue is getting worse, but we're being lied to, up here, to obfuscate it, for political reasons - and that's all i can really tell you.
so, i think that a record and a few weeks or months in jail is actually really a pretty light sentence for what is truly exceedingly poor behaviour, that lacks solidarity with the rest of the working class.

most historical leftists would tell me i'm being pretty soft on this.
hey, listen.

back in the soviet union, they'd have just shot you on the spot for not standing in line.

while i may have the same basic leftist set of morals around being steadfast in the total rejection of any concept of preferential treatment, i'm just suggesting a criminal record for stepping out of line.

historically communist states have generally been far less lenient than that.
who is the victim in this crime of pushing to the front of the queue?

the other refugees, and everybody else requiring access to state resources - like the disabled, and the homeless, who end up thrown under the bus in an act of selfish randianism.