this is what i'm doing for now in order to adjust to the difficulty in finding an affordable, workable smart mirror on the market that has usable mirror features like zooming or exposure, rather than just being a big phone or tv on your bathroom wall, which is utterly boring.

- i have purchased a relatively cheap makeup table with a built in vanilla mirror - no lights, no buttons, nothing. it's just a mirror. the table is 30", but the mirror is only about 20" of that, as there is shelving on it. the table comes with a stool, as well.

- the table is also a charging station, with two usb plugs and two grounded wall plugs.

- i have purchased an extension cord to plug into the charging station which has 6 usb ports and 6 grounded plugs. this will allow me to use the makeup table as a general charging table for other bathroom usb devices, like razors, lights, small mirrors or toothbrushes.  

- i have bought a couple of strings of usb lights to connect to the vanilla mirror, turning it into a vanity mirror with replaceable bulbs

- i am still considering making a four bulb lamp out of a light fixture and installing it over the makeup mirror or over the bathroom mirror, with the latter being more likely. for now, the string of bulbs is $15. does it last two years or two months? is it bright enough? let's see. 

- i have also purchased a small usb-powered mirror with multiple zoom screens (2x, 3x, 10x).

the other option was to purchase a charging desk for $50-80, with a chair for $30 and a standalone mirror with screw-in bulbs, which you'd need to pay $165 minimum (plus shipping) and probably more like $300 for. they really make you pay up front for the screw in bulbs. you still need the extension cord and the magnification mirror, because the lighted mirrors don't do that natively, yet. overall, that would cost you at least $300, if you're lucky, and potentially twice that.

the total cost of the vanilla mirror with the stick on bulbs was under $250, including taxes. the trade-offs are that the mirror is certainly smaller, but i'm not sure i need a giant mirror, and that you can't replace one bulb at a time, but that might not matter. the idea of spending $300 or more for a makeup table with an essentially disposable lighted mirror was a non-starter.

if this doesn't work for me, there are a number of ways to  convert the vanilla mirror into a vanity mirror with screw in bulbs, including buying a handful of small light fixtures and gluing them in, or converting a hanging light fixture or two into a lamp by splicing a ground cable into it. i decided to try with the glue-on lights first to see if it's good enough for now.

ultimately, i wasn't able to find a screw in or threaded bulb lighted mirror under $300 that would ship to canada; my only options were disposable mirrors. i have no choice but to make my own. it's not clear yet if that means building my own light fixture or sticking with the glue-ons for now. if the cheapest screw-in lighted mirror is over $500, it makes more sense to buy a mirror for $30 and build my own light fixture, which is essentially what i did. i got a desk with a charging port, some shelves and a stool with it for a reasonable price.

i have not yet purchased a mirror for the sink, or decided how to approach it, but i do have a backup set of stick on usb bulbs. i'm hoping i can get a couple of cheap wall mirrors here in windsor on facebook or kijiji and i'll have to figure it out from there.

i'd like to board up the window, but i'll need to get a fan in there first, and i'll also need to get the wall fixed, as there was a leak the other night fro upstairs that demoed a large amount of it.

it's a transliteration. there's no correct spelling.

it really does sound like badassshan, if you listen to somebody talk about it.

The official English name of the autonomous region is the Badassshan Mountainous Autonomous Region.[5][6] The name Badassshan (from Russian: Бадахшан; Tajik: Бадахшон) is derived from the Sasanian title bēdaxš or badaxš.[7] "Gorno-Badassshan" literally means "mountainous Badassshan" and is the Russian name of the autonomous region, Gorno-Badassshanskaya avtonomnaya oblastʹ (literally Gorno-Badassshan autonomous oblast). The Russian abbreviation "GBAO" is also commonly used in English-language publications by national and international bodies such as the government of Tajikistan and the United Nations.[8]

if i was a central asian country, i wouldn't want to get into a fight with badassshan.

no, i don't care about propping up corrupt dictators in ukraine. sorry.

if i was in ukraine, i'd be fighting the conscription police.

trump wants to trade ukraine for venezuela. on it's face, it's a smart move, especially if it gets the united states out of eastern europe, where it can gain nothing and lose everything.

however, the united states already has almost total control of the oil. it's not worth the fight.

worse, trump has no authority to bomb venezuela on a whim and congress needs to bite and claw to stop it, including by impeaching him.

his family doctor gave him a rec to see an uroligist, but the nurse heard it wrong and wrote down a rec for a neurologist. so, he shows up, and pulls it out, and then this happens.

attention to detail is important, folks.

https://www.ctvnews.ca/kitchener/article/closing-arguments-wrap-up-in-case-of-former-neurologist-accused-of-sexually-assaulting-patients/

i strongly support this and think it's immensely forward thinking and what the future looks like in the rest of north america. quebec is a step ahead of the rest of the continent on this issue.

the food restrictions might seem overkill, and some media is suggesting it'a ban on kosher or halal. it isn't. the legislation says that public institutions, specifically, cannot offer exclusively religious meals. they can still offer religious meals, but not exclusively religious meals.

there is a singular example where this seems irrational, namely the jewish hospital in montreal. however, there's a deeper question here: why do we have a jewish hospital in the first place? montreal has a significant jewish minority, but it's not enough for a segregated hospital. that's what the jewish hospital actually is. the jews may have said "fine, if it's going to get your noses in a schnitzel, we'll have have our own hospital, and maybe we'll let you see our jewish doctors if you ask nice, in classical hebrew.", but they wouldn't have done that if they didn't have to. so, now the jews have a kick-ass hospital in montreal that's across the street from the secular/catholic hospital. and i don't think they check your dna on arrival, or refuse you service, you just have to eat funny tasting jello if you get your appendix out there instead of across the street. 

ideally, you don't want a publicly funded  jewish hospital at all, but that should be tolerated so long as the market (to abuse the language) justifies it, given the history. given that the jewish hospital is across the street from the normal hospital, that they don't deny access and that it's basically a branch of the normal hospital, you can always go across the street if you really want your free lunch to have experienced immense pain before it died, as you experience immense pain in recovery. why should the lunch get it better than you?

besides that, and the food thing is clearly the least of my concerns, canada has to do this. there are too many religious groups that aren't integrating, because we told them they didn't have to. that was a mistake. our public institutions and secular society are potentially at risk if the issue isn't addressed in a broad scope. the quebecois more recently fought a long fight against the catholic church for freedom of thought and are more sensitive to this than the rest of the continent, as the fight is still real to them, it's not a relic of colonial history. they can't be allowed to save themselves, while the rest of us collapse into ignorance and backwardsness. we should let them lead the way and follow their lead.

quebec is ahead of us, but this needs to become a dominant issue on the left, as soon as the left pulls it's head out of it's ass and stops trying to pretend it's the new right.

https://www.ctvnews.ca/montreal/politics/article/five-things-to-know-about-quebec-governments-new-secularism-bill/

chinese gas consumption probably spiked in 2023 and, unlike other economies, the chinese appear to be on a path towards sustainability, which is allowing them to become the global leaders and leave the americans behind. only the americans are continuing their reliance on dirty oil, meaning america is our only serious market.

canada's policy of trying to end american economic dependency by selling oil to china instead of america is bafflingly, idioticly stupid. you expect that dumbassery from alberta, but not from the liberals.

it demonstrates a lack of actionable alternatives to the united states, but that's geography. it's reality. 

trump is an asshole, but he'll be gone soon. we can wait this out.

https://cepr.org/voxeu/columns/chinas-shrinking-oil-footprint-how-electric-vehicle-adoption-shaping-chinas-oil

all evidence is that trump simply doesn't pay any attention to comedy central. it's fake tv, or a kids network, or something. he only seems to watch the major networks - cbs, nbc, abc and fox.

maybe he can't count high enough to get to comedy central.

people might want to actually take advantage of that.

this is the most ironic/weird part of banning trans athletes.

most of the athletes take steroids. trans women take testosterone blockers.

the trans girls are the only ones not on testosterone.

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c3e033nvx44o

mark carney is building a bridge back to the 20th century.

there are a number of ways to analyze this.

i want to point out that this is a mistake, from the perspectives of the people advocating for it. this is yesterday's policy, by a politician distinguishing himself as a proponent of yesterday, a true Yesterday's Man.

the market is obviously intended to be china. there is not another market accessible from this port that would justify this level of investment.

however, due to a persistent american failure to lead since clinton stepped down, china is actually leading the ev revolution. it is true that one may analyze american consumption markets and decide they'll be buying oil for a while. that same analysis does not apply to china, and only yesterday's man would convince himself that it makes sense to spend billions or trillions building an export market for oil to an economy that is moving past it.

substantive environmental considerations aside, the simple reality is that the economics of the proposal are from yesterday's red papers, they are not current. this is a waste of money that will destroy a swath of bc scenery and potentially create landslide risks and come with no discernible end point. it will probably get cancelled, as chinese oil consumption crashes instead of rises.

this is a pipeline to nowhere.

https://www.ctvnews.ca/politics/article/carney-signs-major-energy-agreement-with-alberta-laying-out-conditions-for-new-oil-pipeline/

i spent the weekend cleaning my laundry area and turning it into a closet, which required a lot of effort. the rugs, floors and walls were utterly filthy, and it made me a little bit sick breathing in the filth to clean it. i pulled up enough dust and dirt off of the floor to fill up a 250 gram bag of doritos, which i used for garbage. that's a huge amount of just dirt, indicating the place hadn't been cleaned in a long time. the intent was to (1) clean and organize the laundry room, (2) clean the bathroom and (3) then clean the kitchen, with the ultimate purpose of the process being a normal monthly cleaning of the kitchen, which is now set up, excet that piece of wood. however, i didn't even finish setting up the laundry (i finished cleaning it), and still have a dresser to somehow get across the apartment and move in. the place is more cramped now than it will be when it's done, and i changed my mind about some furniture in a way that's going to be frustrating to switch back, but it will get done. i had to put it aside for a few more days, but i at least got some laundry done and can keep doing laundry this week.

there will be some pictures appended to the laundry room post (chapter two) as an update and dated to nov 23rd:

https://dsdfghghfsdflgkfgkja.blogspot.com/2025/11/blog-post.html 

i meant to sit down and do a number of things on monday morning before going out to do some errands, but as soon as i sat down, i fell asleep. i was able to get to an appointment with subsidized housing at 15:00 to officially apply for the cohb, i stopped to get some groceries on the way back, i went to pick up the wood i ordered from home hardware and got a lift back, i took a walk down to the mall to get some items and then i bought a pizza on the way back, before falling asleep again. today never got started, as i was groggy and half awake due to not sleeping on monday, but i'm awake now. 

i had to extend my amazon prime trial by a month as i couldn't get everything ordered on time. it's only $10, so long as i'm able to cancel it for the end of december, and i think i should be.

i'm going to do a summary write up in the next post. where was i? what have i been doing?

the rentier capitalists are already cannibalizing themselves. this person's definition of increasing the supply of housing means evicting more people to recycle more existing supply. that's not a joke.

the condo market in toronto is actually already crashing. rents have become too high for people to afford, and building costs are too high to generate profit at rents that are already too high, so the system cannot generate supply, and in fact cannot find people to rent the spaces that already exist. it's a complete market failure. the investors are actually the biggest losers in this system, that has let unregulated markets generate collapse. if this is being pitched as a win for investors, they'll be sorely mistaken as they find out they've priced themselves out of their own market.

government needs to directly build more supply to fix this, but this government won't do that.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/toronto/ontario-bill-60-housing-9.6990632

who does the ndp think it's aligning with in standing in solidarity with hamas?

macron? meloni? is that the new left, in the ndp's mind?

some of the less corrupt ones that are just naive or stupid might have some half-truths to make about human rights, but it doesn't even matter. how many times do the dumbasses need to get slaughtered by stalin before they figure out?

they'll be the first to go, in the end,

but it's not going anywhere. this is a movement that, in the words of john lennon, is not making it with anyone anyhow. 

the ndp is over. move on.

in a situation where the left needs a voice to respond to the liberals, the ndp are instead swinging out to the right of the conservative party, leaving the left entirely disenfranchised at the exact time that it needs to consolidate. we've got major budget cuts to fight and we need to mobilize, but all the party cares about is standing in solidarity with islamic fascism.

left-leaning canadians need to look past the ndp and start organizing without them and without their extreme right pro-fascist sympathies. otherwise, the liberals are going to slash and burn everything, while the ndp are focused on fighting the jews.

to state the obvious, most workers in canada are pro-israel, or at least anti-hamas. the hamas take over of the ndp is violently alienating the party's base.

ndp members on the hamas payroll will make absurd arguments like "the proletariat is changing", but those arguments have no basis in fact. what is changing is the ndp, into a party of foreign-funded useful idiots.

the new ndp is the conscience of tehran.

the ndp are so far right nowadays that you can't tell the difference between heather macpherson and marjorie taylor greene anymore.

do you want to vote for a party that is a functional front from islamic fascism?

i don't.

and, this is why they are getting wiped out. they're not learning, they're doubling down, and they're doing it because it's where the money is. well, they've already followed the money into non-party status and they're about to follow it into total irrelevance, as what is left of the canadian labour movement walks away from the idiots for good.

today's ndp occupy the same place on the political spectrum that the social credit party use to reside in. it's not even pretending to be any kind of left, it's an open embrace of conservative religious values and right-wing islamic fascism, paired with goofy economic ideas that neither make sense in a left nor right wing context.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/idf-soldiers-canada-entry-9.6980946

fwiw, i would label trump a liberal and mamdani a conservative. i think that's pretty clear.

if i were trump, i'd react to mamdani mostly by making fun of new yorkers for it. new york should truly be embarrassed for electing a loser like this guy, and i'd be merciless in ridiculing them for it.

the first thing i would do is announce a $10 million dollar grant to the new york city health department for education and outreach regarding the negative public health impacts of poor sanitation practices in relation to male facial hair hygiene. clearly, new yorkers need a bit of a public health tutorial on the topic.

what i heard was that marjorie taylor green resigned to spend more time with her nose.

what i actually think was going on there is that her district was shifting, and she was trying to adjust to demographics on the ground. as i've pointed out previously, some of these positions, which the modern spectrum assigns to a fake left, are actually conservative positions. the anti-israel and pro-muslim position, for example, is a typical conservative position. that the united states has this right-wing secular jewish lobby is weird; generally, conservatives align with muslims against secularists, and jews align with secularists because they're overwhelmingly atheist, they don't align with secular liberal jews against conservative religious muslims and then somehow call that "right-wing".

but now that she has all this free time, she can always marry a pile of vegetables.

i was recently selected for the cohb; that's an extra $600/month. that adds up to the following extra income beginning to come in over the next few months:

cdb - $200/month + back payments

rdsp - $10,000 + matching contributions on deposits

cohb - $600/month

if i put a substantive amount of the cdb in the rdsp, the government will match 3x as much for the first 10000 and 2x as much for the next 15000.

i can't touch it until i'm 59. however, i can use it to buy stocks or bonds if i want. i am not convinced i will actually do that.

i'm even steven, remember. i went through a few bad years, so i should have a few good years coming up.

there's about 20-25% tariffs in transiting goods through the provinces, and interprovincial trade is around $170 billion. slashing that would be throwing around 35-45 billion dollars away in lost revenue.

for reference, the massive job losses coming to the civil service are expected to "save" the government $60 billion, and probably cost the economy twice that in multiplier effects, and this was being projected as a way to "save the country from fiscal ruin", when it is in truth simply going to ravage large swaths of the local economy in the pm's own riding, which he just won and could now very well lose asap.

the next day, they cut another $40 billion in revenue with no economically coherent way to regenerate it, besides nonsense about tax cuts being stimulus (no empirical study anywhere at any time has ever upheld the ideologically driven market religion belief that cutting taxes stimulates the economy. this is thoroughly debunked as completely faith-driven nonsense with not the slightest shred of evidence to support.)? why?

could it be because they want more spending cuts?

this is an idea they campaigned on, so it's no surprise, but i don't think it's a good idea.

it might be less of a not good idea if they cut the food and booze out, but how less not good is not clear. i will admit that my biggest criticisms were related to food and booze. lumber also sounds like an item that provinces should have tariffs on.

swapping cars for canola tax free might seem like a good enough idea for consumers on it's face, but most canadians would certainly benefit more from the taxation at the tariff level than they would from eliminating those taxes, which all evidence suggests is going to be followed by a cut in services. canadians are better off being taxed for services than they are getting tax cuts and then being told to be pay for the services getting cut. the reason for this is that only a small fraction of canadians (~10% in previous years, but certainly less now due to all the cuts in revenue recently) actually pay enough taxes to cover the cost of healthcare, education, childcare, roads, etc. the vast majority of canadians pay less in that they get back and rely on heavy contributions by the wealthy and by the corporate elite to balance the difference. however, they don't realize that and don't understand their taxes very well. the amount of anger that your average canadian wage slave demonstrates for their payroll deductions would appear to be inversely proportional to the level that they understand where their taxes go, which i'm going to call dumbass workers' law.

for example, i've had people go after me pretty viciously for the money taken off their check to pay my odsp, but that money is paid with property taxes, not payroll deductions, and i was able to point out that one of these guys actually rents. i don't get a cent taken off your check. the money taken off your check currently goes to healthcare and education, but the government increasingly wants to reduce your income to pay for planes and tanks to kill russians with, instead.

this was a silent source of revenue, and my understanding is that it was substantive, as well. cutting this source of revenue immediately after passing the last budget should worry people, as it's going to lead to huge decreases in revenue that a right-wing government can use as an excuse to cut services with. it suggests there might be some kind of cunning plan being implemented.

 

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/bc-interprovincial-trade-barrier-dropped-9.6984871

this is a picture of the cast of mary poppins in 2005ish.

the one in the middle is mary poppins.

she's about 20 years older than the rest of them.

did ryan wedding ever clear a drug test at the olympics?

my understanding is that the drug use at the olympics is rampant, and the olympic villages tend to look something like woodstock by the end of the event.

well, this is frightening.

i don't think it's very close. the video doesn't accurately reflect hitchens' trostkyist perspectives on the russia file. at all.

when there have been wars in ukraine in the last several decades, there's always been an alternative to the europeans and russians on the ground. ukraine has a peculiarly central position in the development of anarchism, which is probably due to the fact that it was a wasteland, free of direct control. ukrainians always had the idiosyncratic need to balance between the freedom of the steppe, and it's inherent tyranny, and the slave-reality of working people in settled eastern europe, with the security that slavery brings. anarchism could likely not have arisen anywhere else. ukrainian wars have always been multisided, with a dozen different flags pushing a dozen different ideologies.

what is weird about the current mess is that there is no alternative, as there always has been, you have to pick between one broken system and the other. it's an alternativeless thatcherian nightmare in a real sense; you can hear her banshee wails and tortured cries, screaming from the night sky no alternative!. i would expect hitchens to take a much more subtle position than this when faced with that truth.

the situation in sudan is extremely complex, but the basic point is that the area has resources and the colonial arab monarchies to their northeast (which are at about the same level of social development as 15th or 16th century europe, before any of the revolutions, even the glorious revolution that ended britain's single brief streak with totalitarian religionism) seek to exploit the region for minerals and for slaves and are making a bloody mess of it while they do so, as has been the status quo there through centuries of arab imperialism and colonialism in the region. 

you could send us forces in to protect them, but they'd be more likely to get caught up in it.

if, however, there were merchants on the ground that controlled access to their own resources, and could protect those assets from theft by arabs and turks and chinese alike, the next question is how to prevent them from conquering somalia. that might be challenging to build but it's the right approach.

the true believer is always the greater threat to freedom than the self-interested cynic is.

i'm going to guess that nicki minaj has probably had a lot of bad experiences with arab men, who tend not to be very well behaved or to have very much respect for people's rights. she's not the most educated voice, but she is probably speaking more from experience than imagination.

for some reason, the american media wants to pretend as though christians aren't getting killed by islamic terrorists in africa. it's classic right-wing denialism and it's becoming standard in the fake left to just pretend hamas and al qaeda and al shabaab and boko horom and the rsf and the taliban and etc just don't exist.

islam is about peace. riiiiiiiiiight.

how fucking stupid do they think we are? i mean, we fell for christianity once and spent a thousand years fighting it off, so you'd think we'd easily learn not to fall for islam, but we have to come to a simple, stark truth, which is that fake left men like the hierarchical components in religionism. they like the idea of telling their bitch what to do. they don't care about the gays. men have to have beards? they can deal with that. etc. if a couple of people get killed or raped, what's the big deal? it's not so bad. just get used to it.

it's these fake leftists that pose us a deeper threat, as a society, than any right wing extremists, and we're seeing it on full display in the media's willful ignorance of the spread of arabic colonialism and islamic imperialism in africa, in central asia, in india and also in southeast asia.

african civil conflicts tend to be multisided and complex, but the basic premise that islamic terrorists in nigeria are slaughtering christian men and raping the women, which is how society works at the barely-not-monkey level, is entirely correct. that is real. you can try explain it or foolishly attempt to put it in "context", but claims that the accusation lacks factual support or empirical basis is just pathetically repeating jihadist propaganda, and reduces the american media landscape to a level of useful idiocy that is something out of saudi arabia, which is increasingly also true, due to the increasing importance of arab blood money in funding and directing american media.

what?

sometimes you need to lift that mirror up. it's how you do it.

trump was recently criticized for calling a journalist named catherine a pig, but what you don't realize is that he was actually referring to karoline leavitt, and he got his prompters backwards.

you know the donald is a closeted gay.

exhibit a: eating pizza with a fork. it's a dead giveaway.

but, just listen to him talk for five minutes.

i think the most exciting thing you're going to find in that email dump is evidence of trump having sex with epstein, himself.

i got evicted in april of this year, signed a lease in may and moved again on oct 1st. my new landlord is weird and distant, but the place doesn't smell like drugs (i haven't finished cleaning it yet) and i'm probably ok here for a while. the local property manager might be a problem as he seems to be a right-wing loser, and i'm more focused on him than the landlord. the landlord seems to be reasonable but he also doesn't seem to care much and so i'm trying to find a balance, and i'm going to have to do the research. i'm going to need to call the ltb today about upstairs, for example.

the middle property is dealt with and i walked away ok if this new place works out, which is looking more tentative by the day.

my dtc got approved, and i applied for the cdb and learned about the perks of registered disability savings; i could get a free $15,000, i just need to apply for it.

so the fact that the issue with the property owners that bought my house in 2023 and aggressively evicted me is going to the supreme court, after a consolidation stint in the court of appeal, is scaring me less. i could use the disability money, if i have to. but i'm extremely confident that the supreme court will come down on the right side of this.

the ontario superior court is corrupt. i was able to figure out that one of the women that bought the place is in doug ford's inner orbit, and is one of his daughter's best friends. she used be a talking head on ctv in toronto. i don't know why any of this happened, but that is the best explanation i can come up with as to the nature of the blatant and open corruption i'm experiencing. the ford family is no stranger to corruption.

while this is only an issue on appeal in a cursory way - i did appeal to the judicial council and did bring up concerning events but have not brought the relationship with the ford family into focus, and don't know what came first, the corruption or the purchase of the small house in windsor through the upper crust elite sotheby's auction house, which normally deals with multimillion dollar mansions on the waterfront in this area - it won't follow the case to ottawa, even if it does follow it to toronto. i need to get out of this court to get a correct ruling.

speaking of epstein.

it seems like it was something like that, that they tried to traffic me, and i shook them off, but i haven't been able to get rid of these right-wing muslim losers that were overseeing it, and they're continuing to follow me around and drug me.

canada's court system suffers from a longstanding issue with a poorly educated judiciary that lacks the breadth of knowledge to deal with a lot of the issues dropped on it and has recently, due to decisions made by justin trudeau, taken a sharp turn to the right. however, it's not normally known for open corruption. this is unusual and it should get stamped out through escalation. 

i am going to post a link to a several thousand page document here soon that is intending to prep the case for the supreme court. it doesn't have the details because i can't prove them but this would be easier if they'd just write me a check and fuck off

the ndp are retards.

i'm never going to vote for this party ever again. 

they're utterly doomed.

if you oppose this, you'll need to vote against it.

that would be the general trend - people voting against palestine, in canada. but the fake left political establishment is taking advantage of the fact that most canadians don't give a fuck, and the fact that the palestinian lobby is well organized and flush in blood money. mainstream fake left groups can get away with this because it isn't a ballot issue.

frankly, for me, it is increasingly becoming a ballot issue, and there is increasingly no possibility i would vote for a party that recognizes palestine, as such a position is deeply immoral and in deep contradiction to the rights of the indigenous jewish people to self-govern themselves, in addition to providing material support for fundamentalist semitic religion.

https://nationalpost.com/news/canada/palestinian-flag-raising-toronto

these kids appear to have been trafficked, probably by the parents.

it's anybody's guess as to whether they're still alive, but the idea that there was no criminal act is not upheld by the evidence, as far as i can see.

the police in canada are more corrupt than they are useless. if somebody bought the kids, they probably bought the cops, too. that's increasingly real life in canada.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/nova-scotia/lilly-jack-sullivan-missing-children-court-documents-car-vehicle-9.6943179

somehow, the liberals have managed to snatch imminent demographic irrelevancy away from the clutches of the right, and watched the conservatives build a natural governing coalition in the process.

what's left of the liberal voting coalition is going to be dead in five years - it's all fat, old, white men.

the liberals have suddenly become a party of gross, smelly, contemptible, revolting old men with disgusting religionist policies and that i would rather pepper spray than have a beer with.

it's a noticeable shift.

every time the liberals send somebody out to meet the cameras nowadays, it's the grossest loser i've ever seen.

they've become a party of middle-aged, balding, ugly, fat and mostly white men.

no.

the ruling is that the indigenous group always owned the land, and europeans just walked in and stole it. an analogy might be helpful.

suppose somebody steals your car, and sells it for a profit. the person that bought the stolen car has somewhat of a problem, in that they purchased stolen goods; they may not have known the goods were stolen, but they are now in unlawful possession of something that was stolen and have to return it if they learn the facts. now, there are two owners of the car - the rightful owner, who had the car stolen, and the person who bought the stolen car. in canadian law, the property must be seized and returned to the rightful owner that had their property stolen and it doesn't matter that you purchased the stolen property, you still have to return it, and can even go to jail if you know the property was stolen and choose to keep it, or evade enforcement around returning it.

i want to reiterate it that: in context, holding to fee simple on stolen property and choosing to evade enforcement is actually a crime that could lead to jail time. 

the government never owned the land, so the purchase of it from the crown was invalid. the land was stolen and needs to be returned. the people that purchased the land in fee simple bought land that was stolen, and it's just like buying a stolen car. some maybe didn't know, but most did and, frankly, they ought to be prosecuted for it.

once the property is returned to the party it was stolen from, the question as to compensation for the illegal sale becomes a civil issue, but the buyer really isn't guaranteed to recover those funds. that's what happens when you buy stolen goods from shady sources.

https://financialpost.com/opinion/is-your-house-just-going-to-be-declared-aboriginal-land-now

my understanding is that what they call "obamacare coverage" is what the health insurance industry elsewhere else calls "free consultation".

it's not a health care policy.

it's not even close.

did the democrats shut down congress for a month because insurance companies lobbied them to?

i can't prove that.

but, yes. probably. 

almost certainly.

i didn't write this article. i'm just posting it.

if i had made this obvious argument three weeks ago, you would have called me a conspiracy theorist, despite the obvious truth of it. it's there, though. you need to read between the lines a little.

that doesn't mean that trump or the republicans are the better choice, it means the democrats really aren't very much better, in truth, and that a lot of people allow themselves to delude themselves otherwise.

https://www.politico.com/news/2025/11/16/insurers-pharma-drugs-obamacare-trump-lobbying-00652761

if the congress is going to waste it's time on gossip and tabloid-level discourse, maybe it's better if it stays shut down.

this is correct. the liberal party has, in line with increasing muslim immigration, taken increasingly pro-muslim foreign policy positions, and isn't interested in addressing the severe human rights consequence of islamic imperialism and arab colonialism in central and eastern africa or in the south-east asian region. we've become a bad global actor, and a borderline rogue state, and can be genuinely and honestly accused of increasingly providing material support for islamic terrorism. if canadians don't care about sudan, they should stop to wonder for a minute if these policies might eventually be used as a pretext for american military action, because the reality is that they would be justified in taking action to stop us from funding these terrorist networks.

the rsf is described as a "paramilitary group". it's a state-funded terrorist group and the uae is a state-sponsor of terrorism.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/world/sudan-uae-canada-carney-9.6976682

a hydro dam in iqaluit is a project of national importance?

the purpose of these projects is to increase stock prices, and that will probably work. almost none of this will get built.

the most important projects we could build that would benefit a majority of canadians would have to do with:

- planting trees

- increasing building efficiencies

- increasing inner city air quality using projects like green roofing

- healthcare investments

- education investments

- housing investments

- electric transportation infrastructure

there's not a trace of any of that in the government's priorities. it's all mining and fossil fuels.

instead of building projects to increase the quality of life for canadians, carney is concerned solely in building export economies designed to generate profit at the expense of quality of life and, more importantly, to benefit foreign investors, and that should have been obvious to voters, but wasn't.

we need an immediate election. the conservatives might win, but that would send the liberals the memo from canadians and be a better outcome than letting the liberals govern like conservatives.

to be clear: we need more hydro power development, and i would support more money for more hydro more generally, but the population of baffin island, which is more than twice the size of britain, is less than 15,000. that's the population of a city block in toronto. even if climate change accelerates off the rails, that area will still have six month long polar nights with weeks of -50 weather, and these rivers being considered to be dammed will freeze over solid for months of the year for decades or centuries to come. it's nonsense.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/second-round-major-projects-nation-building-9.6976532

my father, however, would have argued that gretzky was overrated, and that mario lemiuex was a better hockey player, but it's probably because he was french canadian.

i know a fair amount about wayne gretzky, and it's not exactly because i'm canadian. my father has a hockey nut. i didn't share his interest, as a kid, and he found that hard to understand, but he knew i liked to read. he bought me a fair number of sports related books, including books by ken dryden and an autobiography of gretzky, up to the mid 90s, as written by a ghost writer. 

so, i read gretzky's autobiography when i was a kid. i was about ten. that's how i know he didn't go to high school.

he didn't go to high school because he was a child hockey prodigy and he didn't make the time to finish grade school while playing professional hockey, as a child. nowadays, he wouldn't be allowed to do that. further, he states in his book, via his ghost writer, that he regrets not finishing grade school, as it left him unable to do basic tasks for himself, like count how much money he has. his agent ripped him off pretty badly.

gretzky commands a lot of respect on the canadian political right, but the truth is that what is known about his public life experiences suggest he wouldn't be very good at tabling a budget.

it's not even clear if he can count to 92.

i was initially considering buying a makeup table for the bathroom, and i still might, but i first need to look at getting a mirror over the sink, with some lights. i'm going to have to screw it over a window, so it's a little awkward. i was going to buy a $40 light fixture with four 100 watt replaceable bulbs, then turn it into a plug-in lamp by connecting it to a lamp cord i can plug into the wall, which would cost an extra $25. then, i'd need to buy a $50ish mirror.

it turns out that there's currently a lot of mirrors on the market that essentially do this for you in one step, but they're in an extremely disappointing state, at the moment. first, if i'm going to buy a mirror with built in lights, i need to be able to screw the bulbs in and out and that is instantly going to tripe or quadruple the price. it makes essentially no sense to spend $100 on a disposable mirror with lights, but the alternative is spending $300 on the same thing in order to get screw in lights. second, while essentially all of these mirrors have an operating system installed in them that allows for touch functions in the mirror, the only thing these programmable mirrors can do is turn the lights up and down, which is trivial and useless. a programmable smart mirror should allow the user to zoom in and out like they can on their phone, and to alter the brightness of the reflected image in real time, like you would in a basic photo editing software. i have yet to find anything like that; what i've found are $1000 mirrors that show you the weather in the form of a windows vista gadget and are probably connected directly to cia data centres as intelligence gathering tools (what a perfect surveillance tool, eh?), or that let you stream netflix in the background, like we needed another kind of fucking tv. instead, you have to buy smaller mirrors with built in magnifying levels (2x, 3x, 10x, 20x) on different screens, and no zoom functionality. if you want to zoom in to 5.5x and then out to 3x and then into 10x, on the fly in real time, you're at best needing to find an app for your phone or ipad instead of a smart mirror, but the truth is that such a thing doesn't seem to exist at all.

a smart mirror should be a smart mirror! the future ought to be in smart mirrors with stub versions of android installed in the mirror that allow it to act as a smarter mirror with usable smart mirror functionality, but we're not there yet.

so, i don't know what i'm going to do, yet.

wayne gretzky didn't just drop out of high school, he didn't even go to high school at all. he has about a functional grade 9 education.

he's not somebody you should look to for intellect or wisdom or guidance, unless you're open and he has the puck, and in the latter scenario, you don't need to think about it much; you don't need to call him, he'll find you.

in fact, if you're open and he has the puck, then you'd better keep an eye out, as he has a tendency to bounce pucks in off people's asses and you might just get knocked out if you're not paying attention. but, i mean, that'll still count, right?

https://globalnews.ca/news/11526768/wayne-gretzky-addresses-backlash-trump-canada/

it turns out that the weather today sucks anyways. the sun never came out so the ground never dried up and there's a constant 40 km/hr win moving in from the south. it might be an ok day for a walk, but that wasn't the plan.

some groceries came in this morning and my saw came in this afternoon. the temperature is unusually mild for mid november - almost 20 degrees - but this has become a normal occurrence in windsor/detroit over the last 10 years. we expect a handful of 16+ days in late november and early december, nowadays, and winter, if it happens at all, is usually over by mid january, or early february. a cold day in windsor nowadays is plus 3 or 4 degrees celsius. 

i wouldn't have gone anywhere in the damp windy weather anyways. the wind is not really going to clear out until mid week, so this might be better rain jacket weather this week than it is summer weather this weekend.

my wood will be here next weekend and the temperature will recover again by then. it might feel nicer next weekend, despite not being as warm.

i need to plan the rest of the groceries out, finish writing the document i was typing up for the apartment setup and then finish the last bit of legal writing (hopefully), before i can get those shelves into the kitchen and get to work converting the laundry into a walk-in closet.

the purpose of tariffs is not supposed to be raise revenue. as a tax, this is highly regressive.

the purpose of tariffs, like other pigovian taxes, is suppose to be to change consumer behaviour.

if trump hands out rebates for inflation, it just makes the tariffs a pigovian tax designed to reward those who buy more american products and less foreign products. like a carbon tax.

that's not why he's doing it, he's reacting to public concerns about inflation, but it would make the tariffs more effective as policy (in theory) and something he should have done in the first place if he wanted this to actually work.

our own government might want to consider tariff rebates, as well, that would go out to everybody and reward those that buy canadian items without tariffs, while penalizing those that don't.

i am really tired of the economic nationalism i'm seeing in stores lately and am beginning to go out of my way to find items not made in canada. 

i fucking hate this stupid country.

there was a foolish attempt in the last part of the previous century to try to prove that homosexuality was genetic, despite the science being abundantly clear that behaviour in mammals is never genetic. simple organisms, like reptiles and insects, have little ability to undo their instinctual reactivity, but the development of mammal intelligence rendered instinct largely irrelevant. all mammals, from lions to mice, are born helpless and empty and without any residual genetic instincts and need to be taught everything by their parents or community. an earlier era of biology would have argued that predators like tigers and lions are, like crocodiles, born with an instinct to hunt, but we have known for decades now that that is completely wrong and that lions need to be taught to hunt and will starve if they are not taught to hunt by their parents. the tabula rasa model is the correct model in all mammals and a small subset of birds.

for that reason, citing the gay penguin as biological proof of homosexuality was stupid. birds are still largely instinctual, whereas mammals have essentially no instinctual basis in their behaviour at all. if somebody drops a kid in the forest, they might figure it out, but it will be by self-learning and not by instinct. humans don't have a caveman instinct underneath their civilized exterior. that idea is a debunked myth.

what genes actually do is code for proteins; hormones are proteins. genes make mistakes, and those mistakes have consequences that are usually negative, but they don't directly control or affect choices. the result is that mammals have free will, and that that free will is genetic, in the tabula rasa we're born with, up to the caveat that we don't decide how to manufacture proteins, that is autonomous and determined by our genetics.

it follows that the idea that being gay is genetic is actually incredibly stupid. this is obviously wrong, as the mechanism of using genes to explain sexual behaviour is incoherent. that makes absolutely no sense.

the result of looking for a gay gene - and they looked. hard. - is that they couldn't find one. all of the effort put into finding a gay gene resulted in the demonstrably clear outcome that there is no gay gene and homosexual behaviour is neither biological nor genetic but, rather, a clear individual choice that some people do or don't make. people can choose to be gay, they can choose to be straight, they can choose to be bi, or they can choose to be celibate, which is the actual choice that i've actually made for myself, in my own life.

however, what researchers did find in their attempt to find a biological basis for homosexuality, which they proved wrong, was that there are certain genes that code for testosterone and estrogen development and that errors in transcription in these genes can lead to individuals unable to produce normal amounts of sex hormones. it follows that while homosexuality has no biological basis, it is true that some biological men are born with low testosterone or high estrogen, and that this result can affect their behaviour, in leading to identify with women, or become attracted to men. this generates a biological basis for gender identity that does not exist for homosexuality.

there has recently been a movement amongst conservatives to deny all of this, and flip the evidence over to align with the outcome they want, which conservatives often do, and which is that both gender and sexuality are fixed by god, via the mechanism of genes. the way that these conservatives accept homosexuals is by deciding it's genetic, and therefore determined by god. this might allow them to handle homosexuals as non-deviants (despite their religious rules very explicitly declaring otherwise), but it has no basis in biology or in sociology or even in the mainstream of the pseudo-science we call psychology. it is, in fact, a classic example of conservative anti-intellectualism and right-wing idiocy. but, it follows that if gender and orientation are both fixed, then transgendered people are just confused; the problem is that that's wrong in it's core assumption, and every branch of science states it's wrong.

rather, the sociologists and psychologists are very clear that orientation is not fixed but fluid, and people can and do experience multiple sexual orientations in their lifetime, and are not born with a sexual orientation but rather make choices in what behaviour to engage in throughout their lives, and are free to change their mind as they see fit.

conversely, the biologists are increasingly clear that genetics is at the core of hormonal expression, and that people don't have any real choice in how their hormones are expressed in their genes, or how much of what hormone their body makes endogenously, which has a clear biological effect on their gender identity, although they do have a choice in how they want to react to that.

personally, i discovered i had low testosterone in my late teens when i began feeling experiences of gender dysphoria, and realize this biological fact is almost certainly a consequence of a genetic mutation. this low testosterone resulted in low amounts of body hair and minimal muscle mass, amongst other things. i might have decided to take testosterone injections to address that, but i didn't, and i have the free will to decide how i want to react to my own biology, because i own my own body. that is my choice, not the choice of society, and the law must uphold my right to make choices about my body, whether the society likes it or not.

i've been focusing on some things inside this week. the legal writing is almost done. there's been a few more purchases - 2 tables for the in-unit garage for $50, two more chromebooks for kids that expire in 2029 (i now have three expired chromebooks (one in 2018 and two in 2021) and two that don't expire until 2029) for $75 each, 16 more oversized wall pegs for shelving for $11, a circular saw for $70, two large containers of dill for $45, some more groceries this morning for $200 (that will max me out on virtually everything except produce until the end of december), some replacement usb to ethernet cables for these chromebooks (that no longer have rj-45s) for about $20 and $120 worth of wood, including two large shelves for books and one for under the sink that i can cut in half. next up is materials to build a bright light for in the bathroom.

i wanted to go out to buy some produce this morning, but it seems as though the despicably disgusting perverted gay retard that's been stalking me, and won't accept that i'm not a homosexual and not remotely attracted to or interested in gay men and have never had a gay friend or spent more than five minutes in total aggregate ever talking to all gay men i've ever met in my life, is upstairs. as such, i'm going to have to lock myself inside until i'm sure he's gone, and past experiences suggest to me that this might take several months or even longer.

right now, i'm looking at maybe going outside again some time in the spring. the drug addicts upstairs haven't been evicted yet and i'm starting to draw uncomfortable conclusions about it. the world is a sick place full of dishonest, worthless losers. i'll know they're gone when the heat turns on, as they always turn the heat off when they come in, but i'm concluding they're again getting in with the aid of management, and it won't mean anything if they leave for a few days. i'm going to have to order that produce.

as mentioned, i don't know what this worthless, disgusting, faggot piece of shit wants, but they insist on following me around, drugging my food and talking to me when i'm sleeping in an utterly idiotic attempt to brainwash me into being gay, which i'm not interested in and is not going to work (i would never make the free choice to engage in any kind of homosexual behaviour, which is what being gay is, a harmless personal choice that affects nobody except the gays themselves, and how the law should interpret homosexual decision-making) and apparently expects to move into the apartment and become my boyfriend, despite the fact that i've yelled at him over and over again to go kill himself and explained to him repeatedly that i'm not gay and am in fact not very socially liberal and barely tolerant of faggotry at all. i basically don't care about the fags so long as i don't have to have anything to do with them. the moment that the gays try to interfere with my life, or bother me at all, i essentially believe i'm entitled to stab them in the face and feed them to the rats, because i don't really accept the idea of gay rights in any meaningful sense. if this despicable queer ever identifies himself and tries to talk to me, as i expect he intends to do, i am going to immediately murder him, and i'm telling the world that because i want the outcome to be predictable and expected. i am a transgendered female and consider myself to be heterosexual woman. i don't respect men that choose to be gay, against all biological evidence that insists that homosexuality does not exist, and i don't want to tolerate them. i certainly don't want to be their friends, to have sex with them or to enter into any kind of relationship with them, and the only outcome of this process is consequently necessarily tragic. in what might be a stupid attempt by abject retards to try to prove that trans people don't exist, these faggot idiots are trying to brainwash me into being gay using freudian pseudoscience, because they can't accept what the actual truth is, which is that the science is clear that trans people do exist as a complex result of social conditioning and hormonal genetics, and that gay people don't exist at all, but that engaging in homosexual behaviour is a personal choice and a lifestyle decision that some heterosexual men decide to make. i've done everything i can to prevent the inevitable outcome that i'm going to have no choice but to kill this person, i want it to be described as a hate crime when it happens (as that is the correct analysis), despite also being self-defence, and i am essentially waiting for the moment in which i have the opportunity to kill them. there's no other possible outcome at this point.

right now, my focus is on securing the entry points, making sure they can't get in and locking the place down to keep them out.

the crown prince of saudi arabia should be arrested upon setting food in the united states for his role in the murder of jamal kashoggi, amongst other things.

Narrative

introduction    moving in    kitchen    laundry    bathroom    bedroom 

Introduction

Sept 11, 2025

the place i moved into on may 10th, which has been a disaster, just provided me with a functional $4000-$4500 settlement, with a possibility for an extra $2000-2400 coming. i will need to sign a lease to get the extra $2400.

i have another $1200+ coming from the cdb. i'm asking for $10000+ on my hearing on nov 4th.

the price of small houses in windsor is viciously crashing to well under $200K, and they aren't selling. if i wait a few more months, property values could conceivably start collapsing to under $150K, as the canadian economy burns and disintegrates, as we rapidly devolve to a third world economy under mark carney's pro-market / market fundamentalist mismanagement. as chomsky said, free markets are great...for developing economies. it's a third world economic system that generates poverty and inequality, and we're embracing it head-on in canada, even as we escaped the carnage of it in the last decades, and even as the rest of the world is retreating from it. leave it to canada to evade the mistake the rest of the world made in the 80s and 90s, only to make that exact same mistake 30 years later, while everybody else is learning from it and trying to move on.

due to these settlements allowing me to generate some savings, and prices crashing, i'm seriously considering buying a small house in windsor.

15:19
@windsor, on

for now, the 45% increase in my odsp income since 2022 combined with the 45% decrease in rent over that same period has actually opened up some startlingly appealing rental units at the top of my price range. i'm going to see an 800 square foot 2-bedroom condo tomorrow night that is actually bigger than the basement apartment i had when i first moved here, with the difference being that this place looks almost brand new and full of people that bought the condos and that other place was 100 years old and full of smokers on welfare.

on saturday morning, i'm going to see a basement that's almost as big, but doesn't have a stove and might not have a cable running into it for internet.

i'm also going to see dirty, rotting basements in the same price range as i was previously paying, which would allow me to put close to $800/month in a savings account on a monthly basis. the idea in signing that sort of lease would be to save up to buy as fast as i can, and the unintentional result would be that i might find myself accidentally getting close to the $40,000 odsp asset limit, at $10,000/yr in savings, plus what i'm able to win via tort law for negligence from recent landlords.

this is a reflection of the present absurdity of the housing market. you still couldn't afford the rotting basement on literal welfare or osap, but the convergence around odsp is working as intended, if you can get landlords to listen. it'd be nice to find a 600-700 square foot apartment in a normal apartment building for somewhere in between, but that doesn't exist.

if you can use the irrationality of capitalism to your benefit, you have to do it, and i set my life up so i could. on some level, i'm morally opposed to this, but i have to maximize my self-interest, regardless.

you can be exploited by the system, or you can exploit the system. there's no middle point. it's eat or be eaten, and you can get it or not get it; you can be enslaved by society via the market, or you can enslave the society in return. i'm not naive about this. i don't watch tv, so they can't brainwash me, nyah nyah.

i wouldn't imagine i'd want to move out of an 800 square foot two bedroom condo in a nice part of town any time soon, so i could realistically find myself with a substantive down payment in a few years that i could utilize for a functionally useful endpoint, after the court cases are done.

23:36

odsp is working the way it's supposed to; don't get angry with me about that.

however, the market is completely psychotic and what we're dealing with is a deep market failure in front of us at the most fundamental economic level possible. the fact that odsp is the one thing that is working in the face of a complete and total market failure is a reflection of it being shielded from the market, which has become completely irrational.

23:47

sept 13

i've been in and out of the apartment and have seen a number of places over the last couple of days. after getting some groceries on friday night, i came in at around 21:00 and noticed that there's a key to my apartment door in my mailbox, which worked. this is unsettling, to say the least. at 6:30 this morning, somebody started aggressively buzzing me to get in, which i strictly ignored.

i have filed some police reports and my landlords allowed me to change my locks, but that doesn't really resolve the issue.

i don't know how to process this. as far as i can tell, nothing has been removed from the apartment and there isn't anything missing from it. were they even trying to contact me to give me the key back? i don't know. i know that there's now exactly two keys to get in here, and i have both of them.

i have not had any symptoms of being drugged since august but i'm worried that might change soon.

16:49

sept 14

if you really do the math around what it actually takes to buy a house and the amount of money people are making, even on minimum wage, it's worth asking if the real problem canadians are facing in relation to housing isn't their addictions to drugs, tobacco, marijuana, alcohol, debt, fast food and gasoline.

if i had $3000/month, and i were to rent a reasonably priced $1300-$1500 apartment here in windsor, i'd be able to put $1000/month into a savings account and have enough of a downpayment to buy a $250-$300K house in less than two years. that's barely minimum wage.

it's not clear to me why young people aren't able to do this, other than that they waste their money on poor lifestyle decisions, in part perhaps inherited from their parents, and then complain that they can't afford housing as a result of these poor lifestyle choices, that includes their addictions to debt and gas.

the canadian government may consequently want to research a cost-benefit analysis around the question of if it may be worth trying to get smoking rates, marijuana use, alcohol use, indebtedness, fast food consumption and gasoline use down as a part of it's housing strategy. people might find they can afford to buy a house after all, if they'd just make more intelligent choices with their money and, particularly, if they'd stop wasting so much of it on generating unnecessary carbon emissions.

0:46

sept 16

now, somebody has left a bagel in my box, which i'm interpreting as anti-semitic, and which is weird because i'm neither a genetic hebrew nor a practicing jew. i have less than 3% jewish dna, according to the ancestry.com report, and it's from way back in the 19th century.

the arabs that have been stalking me, and who appear to have initially thought i was an arab, have repeatedly called me a jew and repeatedly expressed frustration that i'm not reacting as expected because i'm a jew, rather than the arab they thought i was.

in fact, my ancestry is overwhelming viking in origin, both directly (swedish/finnish) and indirectly (scottish, irish, norman, russian, gothic). the 3% jewish dna was from philadelphia, which i have deduced is sephardic, and traveled from philly to n'awleans to frisco to vancouver, and then to ottawa, where i was born. my father's side had some north italian that was gothic/germanic in origin. the test did pick up 1% sicilian, which was probably mostly greek in deep origin. the 1% sicilian is the closest thing to any sort of arab ancestry, but it's probably not really there.

the semitic dna is unambiguously on my mom's side, and the ancestor was certainly jewish, as he got in trouble in jewish court for being mean to his wife. it's not up for interpretation or debate; it's jewish, not arab, and it's on my mom's side, not my dad's side. i don't know what the point of a court intervening in a domestic dispute is when your wife is jewish, but the documents exist, and it demonstrates the point pretty clearly, as do the noses on my mother and aunts, which are all quite substantive.

14:07

i don't have a wonky jew nose. it's a bumpy italian nose.

my dad's nose was a mess, but it's because he used to be a boxer in his youth, and it was broken something like ten times. you couldn't figure out anything about his nose by looking at it, other than that it was busted and smashed.

14:11

to the person that left the bagel in my box: come back and leave some humus. 

it was very inconsiderate of you to leave the bagel without the humus.

15:42

what am i supposed to put on this bagel?

my electricity bill?

15:43

if i was managing a property and seeking to rent a place for $1300, and somebody filled out an application for it with an income of $3000, i would tell them their income is too high to rent the apartment and that i'm looking for somebody that makes under $2000/month for $1300/rent.

the reason is that the only conceivable reason that somebody with an income over $2000 would be looking for such a cheap apartment is if they spend $1000/month on drugs, and i don't want drug addicts on my property.

by screening in tenants that make more than they need for a low income apartment, which today is under $1500, landlords are just screening in drug addicts.

a good manager should realize that, and refuse to rent to somebody at less than 50% of their income. the way that landlords currently do this is backwards - instead of saying rent should be less than 50% of income, landlords should be screening out people that want to pay less than 50% and only renting to people that want to pay more than 50% of their income in rent, in order to ensure they aren't renting to drunks, potheads and addicts.

a sober, responsible person will want to spend at least 50% of their income on rent, because what else would they spend it on, besides drugs?

16:41

ideal tenants should seek to spend 50-80% of their income on rent.

anybody that would want to move in somewhere that is less than half of their income is a loser and should be avoided.

16:44

if you're only paying 30% of your income on rent, why haven't you bought a house yet?

because you spend 50% of your income on drugs. 

there's no other conceivable explanation. anybody with 70% leftover after rent should have enough to buy a house in six months, unless they waste it on drugs.

that's why the rentals are full of addicts, because the landlords screen them in by asking for people with disposable income. disposable income is just another term for "drug money".

16:54

landlords offering cheap rentals should tell the people making $3000-$4000/month to apply for something more expensive, and to follow the fucking rules in the more affluent buildings, when they move in there. they'll throw you out for doing drugs in the house; don't move into low income housing so you can smoke drugs inside.

that higher income isn't an asset, it's evidence that the applicant is a piece of shit.

17:01

it should be a red flag.

the guy that makes $4000/month and applies for a $1000/month apartment is a drug addict loser and they are looking for cheap housing so they can do drugs inside without getting evicted.

if this person wasn't a drug addict, they wouldn't be interested in $1000/month housing, they'd be looking for something in the $2000+/month range.

17:04

sept 17

i have the best apartment in my price range in town, but it's uninhabitable due to the drug users on the premises. our government's failure to enforce basic drug laws, and put addicts in jail where they belong, is making it virtually impossible for normal, healthy people to find acceptable, affordable housing. it's a complete failure of law enforcement, and a complete failure of canada, as a society.

if you want to move to canada, there's almost no escape from the now ubiquitous drug culture.

it's not the greatest country in the world. it's an uninhabitable hell hole.

19:22

canada needs to have a very serious discussion about recriminalizing marijuana, and about enforcing it.

legalization has failed.

19:26

i have never seen the legalization of drugs as some kind of justice issue, and the idea that it is is an insult to the concept of justice. it's not particularly hard; if you don't want to go to jail, don't do drugs. the best argument in favour of legalization is that it would reduce wasted police resources, and the idea is that it would cost less money on enforcement, but i doubt that's actually the case, and it's probably demonstrable with the right statistics.

i'm really not interested in helping drug addicts. society has no reason to give a fuck about addicts. what i'm concerned about is strengthening laws that ensure that normal people aren't subject to the habits of addicts, who have no right to enforce their poor decisions on the people around them.

what we need is better case law strengthening the rights of non-smokers. municipalities should be able to directly fine tenants for smoking anything inside, anywhere, and the fines should be substantive - $1000/occurrence. that would shut it down. there should be zero tolerance in case law for any sort of inside smoking for any reason, and complaints by tenants should overpower decisions by landlords. the right to fresh air should be enforced as fundamental law.

we have an ongoing public health emergency in our multi-residential housing complexes. there is no safe level of exposure to tobacco or marijuana. tenants should not be expected to tolerate even the slightest whiff of smoke from anywhere.

smokers should be expected to smoke in their cars with the windows closed.

19:50

sept 20

it's relatively clear that somebody was in here last week or the week before to drug some of my food, i think my soy milk. it wasn't enough to generate effects that would bother me when i'm sleeping or when i wake up - i am waking up limp or at worse not even 10% erect or 10 second erections but needing intensely to urinate - but it had some effect on my body, which has taken roughly two weeks to max out. i think it reached it's peak the last few days.

i had to cancel appointments last night and this morning because i have scabs all over my face and look utterly disgusting, but it is washing off, and i don't think it's getting worse.

it's just a process of actually cleaning it off. it's just dirt, it's just filth, and it washes off like any other filth and dirt. the problem is that that process is extremely time consuming and can require repeated applications of various types of soap over and over again.

i spent all night last night scraping, slept briefly, spent all day scraping, slept again, and started back on it tonight. i'm going to guess i might be presentable by tomorrow or monday.

i have changed my locks. only i have the keys. so i'm prioritizing cleaning myself up first, under the assumption that this won't happen again.

the most annoying thing is that the inside smoking has largely stopped, as soon as i signed the consent agreement. i need to leave by oct 31st. i think the worst smokers are leaving by sept 30th. there was a pothead smoking joints outside my window that has left.

i'm not sure i can get anybody to agree, but if i can chase the potheads out of here, could i resign here for nov 1st?

it's the biggest, cheapest place i'm going to find. it's just that i can't live in the filth of my neighbours' fucking smoke.

23:35

my thermostat says 29. the outside temperature is 18 and seems extremely cold. i'm shivering inside, and have a chill.

it's a good sign. it suggests my testosterone is back where it should be, at trace levels, and i just need to wash off the remaining dirt.

these extremely sick people need to go to jail for the rest of their lives. they have to this point evaded charges, but i'm hoping my landlord can trace the origin of the key, and that it provides a suspect for police to follow up on.

23:41

sept 25

all of the old people are smoking drugs nowadays, which is going to lead to severely reduced life expectancy. they're all going to die of cancer.

this is only bad news if you're a banker. for the rest of the country, the fact that decreased population growth will open up job opportunities, reduce housing costs, ease up social services and potentially even result in deflation is the best thing we've heard since 2006.

https://globalnews.ca/news/11450130/canada-largest-retirement-wave-fertility-rate/

12:59

this is anecdotal, but there's every reason to believe it's honest:

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskOldPeople/comments/1k02piz/people_who_have_smoked_cannabis_most_of_their/

marijuana use amongst retired seniors has skyrocketed in canada over the last ten years. well, i mean, what else do you have to do? you'd might as well just get baked and watch cartoons.

- strokes

- heart attacks

- lung disease

- cancer

- reduced cognitive functions

that's real life, and it's going to be an epidemic here, which is fine if you want them to just fucking die and go away already.

13:10

i've been going around all over the place looking for housing in windsor, and the entire city is just saturated.

then you look over and realize it's an old granny smoking on her porch.

13:11

sept 26

i've noticed a new line show up on rental applications over the last few weeks.

VISA: student or temporary

i have to scratch it out and write in "born in canada".

14:50

sept 28

it's near the end of the month, and i'm rather annoyed. i've seen a handful of places i could have moved to by now, but nobody wants to sign.

i'm going to send out mass emails that are just blunt - you want a good tenant? want to stop looking? well, you have a few more days before oct 1st. i have the money. i can sign and move now. like, what's the problem?

i know that the problem in some cases is that the owner is muslim, and in other cases that my income source is odsp. it's widespread discrimination on one of two considerations - gender identity or source of income. but, launching hrto applications is going to take years, and i need to be able to prove the case. i might be able to make the case against one very big company, but it's not clear that it's worth my time.

further, regarding the issues of muslims not wanting to rent to me because i'm trans (and i have several examples of this), i'd actually rather we get the issues out before hand, so i don't get trapped in it. the last thing i want to do is move into a situation where i have to deal with conservative muslims, and then fight with them for months or years. i'm doing the opposite; i'm sussing this out and going beyond it, by actually actively asking them if women dressing immodestly, or eating pork or drinking alcohol is going to upset them, because i don't want to live there if it does.

i really should have moved by now. i've seen enough places. there have been more than enough places i would move to. but i have not yet succeeded in finding a landlord that would rent to me, and it's about 85% discrimination underlying it. i can really not see good reasons not to rent to me in any of these applications, but they want to tell me my income is too low (despite me doing the math for them, showing it isn't, once you take out debt and cars, mostly, which i'm not paying for) or they just don't respond further once they realize i'm trans.

the discrimination against trans and disabled people are both rampant, especially amongst muslim landlords, which represent a substantive number of the low income rentals in this region. they'd be wise to be careful about what they say to me, but i'd largely rather avoid them, anyways.

the thing is that i don't want to make assumptions about people. i'm trying to get a showing in a basement owned by an arab guy, and he even told me to reschedule because he was busy praying, but he doesn't want to enforce his views on me, and is even trying to help the current tenant out, who is apparently a destructive alcoholic. i know discrimination when i see it, but i can't reverse it by making assumptions; i need to ask. it's mostly been a waste of time, but i can't make that assumption ahead of time. nine out of ten arabs might be viciously transphobic, but that one that isn't, even if they're religious, might be the best landlord in the city. 

22:38

moving in

sept 30

i'm officially moving again over the next few days.

it's not very far. i feel like my fucking parents, who used to move across the street every six months.

the place is smaller, but it's laid out better. i haven't had the opportunity to maximize the space here, but it has two 150 square foot rooms (bedroom, living room), two 50 square foot hallways, an awkwardly 100 square foot kitchen with lots of counter space and fridge & stove on the side walls, and a bathroom. this place is around 600 square feet, but i'm wasting a lot of it, and i can't find a way to save it. the living room is 50 square feet too small and the bedroom is 50 square feet too big, and the 100-150 square feet of hall space isn't helpful. i needed to move. if i had more time to look, i would have skipped this space; it's 600 square feet, but i'm only using 350-400 of it.

the place i'm moving to is around 450-500 square feet, but it's laid out in a way that's more useful to me. the hallway is at the bottom of the stairs, so i have a natural place for my bicycles, away from the main living area. the bedroom is smaller, so i'm not wasting the space in it. there's a separate laundry room, where i can put the sewing table. the kitchen is smaller but more usable. there's a second entrance that i can use for studio space, which opens up a large living room. it's just a way better layout, for me. most people would find it awkward, but it's going to be arranged to look like it's twice as big, whereas this place feels half as big.

it's a little rough. that's fine. i don't care. i'll fix it.

so, i will be moving the rest of the week and hope to be done with this by monday.

1:28

the new place is about $200 cheaper, and i'll soon be about $200 better off, per month. i've also gained a few thousand dollars in my account. i don't foresee any fights with the landlord, and the space should be a lot less smoky.

i think that i should be stable there for a while, enough to let me get back to work very quickly, as soon as i'm able to set the space back up.

9:25

what's next after this?

i have a hearing with my previous landlords on nov 4th, about me suing them. i need to update the new evidence, serve it and file it. i'm asking for upwards of $20,000 in damages for smoking and illegal entry. the new evidence includes drug tests and also the key i found in my mailbox, here. i don't know if they'll let me file it or not, but it demonstrates the point - somebody has been getting in my apartment, and somebody has been drugging me.

my appeals of their eviction order are now scheduled to go forward in the spring. i'm asking for a reversal of the costs orders and damages relating to the wrongful eviction, including the costs of staying in a hotel. that's going to be another $5,000-$10,000.

they got their house. fine. but the court should order them to pay me for it.

what am i going to do with all of this money? i have an asset limit of $40,000 on odsp, and need to be careful i'm not shooting myself in the foot, but a $20,000 downpayment would be enough to buy a $150,000-200,000 house, which exist in windsor, and which will reduce my rent/mortgage payments to well under $1000, which is the cost of the new lease. these are small bungalows or two story houses, mostly downtown. i don't need a big fancy house; i'm concerned about minimizing labour, not about maximizing wealth. this is a minimization problem for me, not a maximization problem. i have to live in capitalism, but i don't want to participate in it. further, i'll get that back when i turn 65, and no longer have an asset limit.

the reality is that nobody wants these houses, at this point. they're too expensive to rent. the bourgeois don't want them, and the students and poor can't afford them. that's the underside of capitalism i moved here to take advantage of, and which trudeau's immigration policies had taken away from me, by opening up a market for things nobody else wants.

that could work itself out by the summer, if all goes according to plan.

if this works out for me and i move in the summer, it will be my last move. i'm not interested in climbing ladders. i don't care about the neighbours. this will ensure that nobody can take the house away from me again, and ensure nobody can move disgusting losers that do drugs into it. it's the end of this process. 

i'll have to determine in the end if it is more logical to stay there or to sell the house and move into a seniors apartment, which have reduced rents.

11:02

i am again moving into a basement. this will be my third basement in windsor. my basement stays have been lengthy - 08-2013-12-2017, 10-2018-04-2025 - while my two apartment stays have both been less than a year.

this basement is about $200 more than the previous basement (when i left). it's smaller than the first one, but bigger than the second one.

however, i didn't have my rent increased for five+ years in the previous space. how much would i be paying if i paid the rent increases?

750*1.025^7 = ~$900. it would be a little less than that, probably around $850.

however, i'm getting an extra $200/month from the cdb, which balances that out.

in the previous basement, i had around $400-600 left for groceries and disposable income together, after paying bills. it fluctuated, but generally went up. now, i'm going to have $700/month to start, and that's going to go up.

so, this has taken a while to sort itself out, but in comparison to the previous basement i was in from 2018-2025, i'm going to end up with a bigger space and with more money in my pocket per month, and also with more in the bank to start with. my material conditions have consequently evened out.

this is due to the reality that i'm even steven. things always work out for me

now, i just need compensation for the wrongful eviction, and i'm working on it.

i don't want to mislead you or mischaracterize this. this has sucked. i've had years of my life stolen. however, i ended up better off, in the end.

11:48

so, don't waste your time fucking with me. it all evens out for me.

i don't actually believe in karma, but i believe in paul mccartney.

and, in the end  [bloop. bada bloop.]

the love you take

is equal to the love

you make

11:59

somebody's going to tell me that was carol kaye.

they won't tell us until mccartney is dead, and they shouldn't.

12:00

for the young and the profoundly ignorant.

12:01

well, ok.

12:02

oct 4

i signed my lease on tuesday, got my new keys on wednesday, moved the furniture in on thursday and moved a lot of the smaller items in last night. i seek to be out by monday morning, and i'm going to do it the slow and safe way, which is by bicycle. i could cart stuff over, and i will need to cart some things, but i want to cart as little as possible. i want to get through the distance from a to b as quickly as possible, and allowing observers the least amount of detail in observing what i'm doing. this is the 5th location i've lived in since i moved to windsor in 2013, and 4 of the 5 have been downtown, but this is the first time i have to move through the creepy part of the city.

i'm actually going to be further from the creepy area than i am now. it's not a or b that i'm worried about, it's the transit in between. i can go in the back way, but it doesn't really help.

i also learned when i got the keys that the space includes a 150 square foot private storage and work space, which makes it bigger than the first basement in total square footage and the biggest place of the 5. it's very rough, though, so i don't want to think of it like that. however, it's going to let me not just store my bicycles there but also split the work bench out of my studio, which has become a large part of it. this work space will be where i fix bicycles, work on guitars, solder and do other types of physical work. it has a two level storage space built in for shelving, as well. it's really quite a large area.

if i buy a house in the next year or two, i'll move this into the basement.

so, that opens up space in the unit, as well. i can take my work bench right out of the studio and i can put shelves instead of bicycles in the hall.

i was a little queasy when i started moving things in, and was having second thoughts, but i'm feeling better about it now. the place needs some work, but it'll get done.

6:59

oct 6

it is utterly fucking beautiful out.

i had a shitty summer; stuck living with disgusting male pothead losers (again) and fighting off some religious idiot's decision to put drugs in my food, while needing to save money to move again. i'm moving, which sucks, but at least it was a nice weekend.

i've been walking around outside and, in every direction, the vegetation has taken advantage of it. it's october 6th, and there's not a bit of red or yellow or orange anywhere, in any direction. every tree everywhere is as full as possible and deep, luscious green. it's starting to look and feel more like a rainforest here in that respect, although we've had very little rain since june.

the new house doesn't seem to have potheads. there are what appears to be some heroin addicts upstairs, but they don't seem to smoke it. fine. whatever. i'd rather live with heroin addicts that don't smoke anything than with potheads that are constantly emitting dangerous air pollution. the heroin addicts aren't bothering anybody; the potheads are bothering people around them that don't want to get lung cancer.

if you live in windsor, plant some trees or plants around. it'll help to clean the air of some of this horrible marijuana pollution.

18:48

oct 11

i made a food bank run on wednesday and friday which might be the last run, finished moving on friday, gave back my keys, got my check, and then did some grocery shopping for the next week or two. i will need to eat through specific food bank items first before i get back into my food schedule, which should be in a few more weeks. i will have a lot of fruit and salad to eat through first.

i am utterly exhausted and need to catch up on sleep. i bought a chicken for thanksgiving, which i think is a stupid holiday, because i did this the last time i moved into a new basement, in 2018.

the drug dealer upstairs gets a lot of business. he's constantly leaving the door open to let his clients in. my observation is that his business model is that he has scouts working to bring in new clients. it's a sick business in a sick world. they are apparently getting evicted. i guess i'll need to wait it out.

for now, my focus is on eating, sleeping and cleaning both in here and myself. my hair is a mess.

22:12

oct 13

i'm sorting through what kind of furniture i need to make sense of this new space, which is relatively large but also extremely rough and therefore very cheap, and i'm realizing i can do some unusual things with it, for it's price range.

this is a $1000/month basement in the bottom of a house with a busy drug dealer living on the top floor. i have no reason to call him in at this point, and won't so long as i'm not smelling weed, but he couldn't be more fucking obvious. he's got somebody banging on his door every 20 minutes.

for reference, the apartment i just abandoned was $1200/month, on the third floor and somewhat smaller in total footage, but also more finished and came with three other apartments in the building full of potheads that were polluting my air space. the basement i got evicted from in the spring was less than $800/month and discernibly smaller than either. the basement i got evicted from in 2018 was less than $700 when i left (i signed at $650) and about the same size as this one, overall, but far more finished.

i've thought through how i want to do this and have decided that the new space is going to consist of the following rooms or areas:

1) a small but usable bedroom, partly because much of the storage that you expect in a bedroom exists elsewhere in the apartment, but big enough for a stereo system, a study/writing desk and a bedside computer pc typing system

2) a large enough bathroom for substantive shelving, full wall mirrors and a makeup table

3) a walk-in closet off of the bathroom (not the bedroom) with built-in laundry and a dedicated sewing area

4) an eat-in kitchen with expanded counter and shelving space

5) a side entrance with a space for coat and shoe storage

6) a voip phone and zoom (via voip videophone) area off of the kitchen

7) about 150 square feet of studio space

8) a small couch area with a stereo for listening

9) space for an exercise bike off the front entrance

10) a device charging area behind the front door

11) a 150 square foot work and storage area as a functional in-unit garage or actual basement in parallel to the apartment, with functional 2-level storage built in.

12) sufficient wall space for cd and book storage

it's cheap because of the drug dealer and the various problems a drug dealer creates to property values, but i've been told they're getting evicted. the front door, for example, is pretty brutal. i haven't seen the effects of the drugs yet, but i'm sure i will. i have recently seen somebody passed out beside their shopping cart around the corner, because they couldn't make it over the bridge, and i jumped to probably correct conclusions. he just fell over; he might have been technically dead.

it's going to take a few weeks, maybe a few months, to set the apartment up. right now, i'm not sure the furnace works, and i'm waiting for the owner to do some minimal but necessary cosmetic work.  

i hope i don't get evicted to raise the rent, again; i'm unfortunately realizing the necessity of planning around it, and want to focus on buying if i have to move again. some small houses in windsor are starting to list under $180K.

0:42

let me warn everybody: if you buy this house to evict me, i will take everything with me when i go. you will be deeply disappointed with what you end up with, which won't be what you thought you were getting.

it's a huge space for a low-income rental, which is what i wanted and got (~600 square feet in the apartment, up to 700 including the laundry and closer to 900 including the in-unit garage. the upstairs units don't manage space well because they've been converted into apartments, but this is the entire basement of what used to be a moderately sized house). it's been partially recently redone; the hot water and furnace are fairly recent. there's new inside doors, new flooring in the bedroom. somebody tried to give a fuck and gave up, which left me with a lot to work with, and i'm going to finish the job.

0:54

oct 14

how am i feeling?

a lot better, but it's fairly dry down here, and that's had some effect on me. i need a long shower. i don't think they've drugged me in a while and i'm not sure yet if they've followed me.

i bought a few things yesterday to start the process of redesigning this basement off - a plastic drawer system to fit into a hole under the counter, a shoe rack, a fan, a mercury thermometer to replace the one i broke and a digital "weather station" with alarm clock and calendar that i actually suspect i'll find extremely helpful. i still have my radio/alarm clock from about 1991. i remember listening to smells like teen spirit on it when it came out. i haven't used it in 20 years, and it's well in need of an upgrade. i just don't use alarm clocks. i'm very good at waking myself up on time, without one.

i'm looking at putting a mini fridge and a long table in to extend the counter, with a smaller table underneath it to put a stereo system on.

there's somebody coming tomorrow to look at whether he can install a fan in the bathroom or not and that's going to help dramatically, but i need to do the kitchen first, the walk-in closet second and the bathroom third. i don't know if i need a plumber or not yet. the kitchen plumbing appears to be fine.

21:04