there are pictures from march, april and may but i haven't sorted through them yet.

i don't quite look like myself again, yet, but it's getting better, and all i can do is wait for the estrogen to work.

i'm more sad than angry. these people are disgusting, perverted losers and i don't understand why they even care what i look like, but my life has been a struggle to fight them off for months, and it doesn't look like that's going to change soon :(.

"Every dime that we spend needs to be accountable,"

is that doug ford doing a line by line audit?

a right-wing liberal concerned about "fiscal accountability"?

no, it's the supposedly left-wing olivia chow, pulling the usual switcheroo on toronto voters, who once again got suckered by the ndp and are in the process of bracing for an upcoming austerity budget.

if it was doug ford, he'd just call his favourite banker up to ask for more debt, then make sure his family owns shares in the bank. but, municipalities should have access to public debt, and should have a mechanism in which the province takes over.

in canada, the province has total control over the municipality which is a "creature of statute". yet, the city is on it's own for debt, somehow. that's a contradiction that needs to be resolved. if the province wants control over the city, it should take control of the debt; if it wants the city to take on it's own debt, it should change the legislative framework around incorporation so that it is more fully autonomous and can go to the bank of canada directly.

i noticed japan was at the nato conference.

that could only mean one thing.

putin had better watch out for the secret ninja corps.

the creepy losers upstairs keep demanding i "look like my father". in fact, i've posted here about how glad i am that i don't look like my hideously ugly dead father and that's the last thing i want, but the idiots are some kind of pseudo-freudians, so everything is about your parents and everything is about sex to them....when the truth is that nothing, for me, is about sex, and nothing is about my parents. freud is the biggest pseudo-intellectual since aristotle, and we can only hope he doesn't do the same level of damage, in the long run.

their "therapy" has little option but to cease and desist. they can't get in here. they keep talking to me when i'm sleeping, though, and i'm in a precarious situation, as they didn't want to give up.

i consequently decided that there was no other option but to bleach my hair a little bit early. i wanted to dye it in may, but i wanted it to be longer than it is. the psychotic losers actually cut the front several times while i was asleep before i realized it.

i dyed it various shades of orange or red several times over the last year, as i was waiting for it to grow in. the result is that it is bleached, but is a strawberry-orange-blonde, with complex hints of orange and red highlights. this was very intentional. right now it is roughly chin length, and the highlight should go grow out as the hair does.

i didn't use the purple, but i might do my roots purple some time in the winter, before the next bleach job in the spring. that would leave the top a bright blue or purple hue.

so, is that it? is it back to normal? no. i'm still struggling with some aspects of the forced drugging, and i will need it at least back to shoulder length before i decide it's back to normal. a consequence of the forced drugging with testosterone that i cannot undo is that my hair is noticeably thinner than normal, and i'll just have to wait for it to grow back in. all i can do is stop them from further drugging me and wait for it to regrow.

so, things are moving in the right direction, but only slowly, and it's going to be a while still before i'm back to productivity.

i'll try to get some pictures up soon. i basically look like i did in 2012/2013 but older, rather than i did after the last estrogen boost in 2016. this is a step backwards in the transition, and not something i wanted, but it's manageable and not catastrophic.