re: money

From: sister’s email address
To Jessica Murray <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>

Can you please bring me the black Moore's overcoat back that Dad lent you? I would like it.

so, it's official: i'm moving to windsor. lease signed, first/last down, receipt received, keys in pocket.

i'll be leaving some time next week.

i got the place i wanted, not the one i was an hour away from settling for.

currently at the greyhound station; will take the 5:30 out. should be home in the morning.

now, if you'll excuse me, i have to go fill up a few mountain dew bottles for the ride home...

i'm supposed to be like "don't worry, i'll visit". but that's a lie. i don't celebrate holidays. i'm not going home for christmas. most of you are never going to see me face to face again, unless you come here or we meet in some third location. i'm not going to throw any kind of party, but if you want to say goodbye, or you always wanted to kick my ass, then you've got a few days to get in touch.

Re: i'm in windsor

From: Jessica Murray <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>
To: grandmother’s email address

i got the one i wanted, which is $650 all inclusive and fucking beautiful.

the stepmother wired me $1600. the sister has the $1500 mom gave her, and she's going to use it to help me move.

i’m taking the 5:30 bus and will be home early in the morning.

j

Re: i'm in windsor

From: grandmother’s email address
To: Jessica Murray <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>

how is everything going now?did you get the apt? Did your sister say the  money was from your step-mother?When are you coming back?Waiting for your Email.

mom
Hope everything works out for you. And I love you very much! I wish I wasn't so drunk when I saw your sister last night...I hardly ever see her and just wish I would have been sober.

You can't claim anything by the way with Disability ...The cut out the moving allowance.

They

I have to get some better glasses...The ones I have are crap!

Be very careful what you disclose to them!

My advice is to NOT TELL THEM MUCH...Except J...They are going to know!...Because they have access to your bank account!

They can be real fuckers!

Remember when you lived with me? I had to pay all this large amount of money back....They took it off monthly....It just stopped last month!...I finally don't owe them any money anymore.

Of course apparently I owed them thousands from before you were living with me too.

They don't let you get away with ANYTHING!

I think if it is an inheritance....You are OK with it.....I think your stepmother may have to give a letter or something.....Tell her to include mine in there as well...

Jessica Amber Murray
i can claim up to a certain amount as a gift, not an inheritance. that's my plan. the moving allowance is still on the web site, but it's 'discretionary’.

re: money

From: Jessica Murray <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>
To: sister’s email address

yeah. i've been in sort of a daze. i don't know. i had a big cry in the bathroom here, did a lot of dramatic writing. i'm kind of not sure if it hasn't hit me yet or if i'd already dealt with it before it happened. it's clicking, but it's not entirely clicking.

i'm sort of struggling with what to write here. i haven't slept much in the last week. but my facebook page is sort of like a journal, and i think if sorting through the last week (scroll down to mid july) is the best way for me to explain what i've been feeling.

bitch better have my money (or what happens when you realize you gave away $1500 while blackout drunk)

mom
J....Did You Get Your Money?....

J..Did you get your momey!????????????????

Jessica Amber Murray
in the end, the stepmother wired 1600. so the sister still has the 1500. she's going to hang on to some of it for moving costs and then give the rest back to you. i can claim some of the moving costs after (it's 'discretionary').

mom
Please tell me whether you got it or not?????????!!!!!! I gave it to your sister.

Jessica Amber Murray
yup, the sister still has it. the 1600 from my stepmother went through and that should cover what i need for the moment.

mom
She was supposed to have given it to you!

Jessica Amber Murray
i agree with her decision. it was an emergency replacement amount. in the end, the stepmother agreed to wire it. so, i don't need it right now. i *will* need it in a week or two when i move, and i can use it for that.

mom
I gave her $1500.....................!!

To give to you!

Jessica Amber Murray
i will get the $1500, soon! moving a big truck of stuff from windsor is extremely expensive. it might cost close to $1000.

mom
You Are BOTH A BUNCH OF LIARSQ.................................................................................L

LIARS!....................

Thanks a lot.

Jessica Amber Murray
i wasn't expecting the stepmother to transfer, but i guess she clued in when my sister left that i was serious. i'm definitely not lying. if you want, i can tell her to give it back.

i really, really appreciate that you were willing to lend or give me the cash at all. but the original plan worked out in the end. it probably worked out *because* the sister agreed to the whole thing. so, thank you even for that.

mom
Hey!,,,,I just gave you $1500.00 dollars...Are you unaware of this fact?

Jessica Amber Murray
i am keenly aware of this fact.

mom
Who gave you more?

Jessica Amber Murray
well, she gave me 1600.

mom
You are an ASSHOLE!

YOU USE PEOPLE FOR YOUR OWN PURPOSES!

Jessica Amber Murray
do you honestly believe that i set up an elaborate plan to trick my own mother into giving me $1500? c'mon.

mom
I am ENRAGED AT YOU!

Jessica Amber Murray
well, do you want the cash back?

mom
NO.

Jessica Amber Murray
ok. then i don't know why you're mad....?

mom
But you could have been more honest about it.

Anyways...Love You....

Going to sleep now...

re: money

From: sister’s email address
To: J <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>

i hope you are feeling alright. i have had a very long day. i'm sure you miss dad too.

re: money

From: Jessica Murray <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>
To: sister’s email address

ok, i misunderstood your facebook messages; when you said 'she', i thought you meant the stepmother. i thought nana was going to wire money from mom.

i spent all day flipping out that i was going to go home with nothing and in the end i got three transfer options.

yeah. hang on to it, please. and just give what's left back. i don't need to double on this.

i don't know how much of the moving costs i can claim through odsp after. it's 'discretionary'. i'm also trying to figure out if i'm helping esa move as well. seems silly to go down in two trucks if it would fit in one.

i'll get that info to you soon.

j

i'm still in that same tim horton's. it's been about 30 hours, now, stuck here.

i'll dream about this place for the next twenty years as an archetype of purgatory. i'm going to avoid this line of thought. of course, i'm not actually avoiding it, i'm just avoiding typing about it.

really, the day has essentially been spent trying to find a means of escape from this place. i can't count how many bagels i've eaten, or how many times i've brushed the coffee off my teeth, or how many conversations i've overheard (oh, that's just a weird way of saying palisher), or how many plans i've created that twirl through obstacle courses with incomprehensibly frustrating and entirely unpredictable twists before they come out as dead ends. what i mean to take 3 hours took 30, but it's done.

midnight is too late to check in anywhere. it's raining. it's even kind of chilly out.

....but i'll be out of this place of absurdity the second i see the first ray of sunshine come up, and very much ready to start something entirely new.

money

From: sister’s email address
To: J <death.to.koalas@gmail.com>

I just got back and the stepmother is telling me she just transferred $1600 to you. Use that money for your first and last's month rent, and your bus ticket.

The money mom gave me to deposit was to be used for your first and last month's rent. It feels disingenuous to just transfer it without her knowing that you already have that taken care of now, however it should now be used to pay for the cost of moving your belongings to Windsor. We can arrange for movers as soon as you have an address. If there's any leftover I will transfer it to you.

Let me know your address when the lease is signed tomorrow.