you couldn't stretch your arms long enough to make an adequate gesture for beauty.

you know that, don't you?

therefore, beauty lies within the impossibilities of the body.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ndK3BM77o5s

the loan is actually due at the end of june. as expected, it's $320 to pay on the $300. so long as i pay it on time, it will only cost me $20.

obviously, i want to deal with this asap. the staff there were absurdly slimy; they made it abundantly clear that the business model is generating interest on repeat loans by taking advantage of people that aren't getting enough from assistance. luckily, i just need some quick cash to go dancing. i'll be happy if i never go back in there. but, i'm just going to have fun this weekend and figure out what the best way to juggle it is, afterwards.

i expect to pay it off right away on the 31st. but, i could technically put aside $150 this month and pay in full using $150 from the july check, as well. the thing is that i'm used to living with nothing, so paying it upfront will not harm me as much as it might harm others. it would obviously be more leisurely to soften it over two checks, but i may prioritize getting rid of the issue, instead. it will depend on what's left at the end of the weekend. if i run through everything, i'll probably split it over the two months. if i end up with more than $50 left, i'll probably pay it in full.

i need to nap.

i just want to stress the point.

i don't need this loan. i could stay in this weekend. i had three overnights already this month, although the first was unintentional. i had a good month, already. i merely want this loan.

there's no need for systemic reforms to allow me to party in detroit. this is frivolous. i'm well taken care of.

but, so long as it's really only going to cost me 20 bucks, i'm going to do it.

if i walk in there and get a different story, i'll walk right out. i mean, that's the difference between my circumstance and the circumstance of somebody getting taken advantage of: i can read the terms and walk out. i'm not in a day-at-a-time situation, where i need to take a gamble and hope for the best.

that means i'm planning for a much quieter june, and will hopefully get back to doing something.

i feel like i need a bit of a blowout. this weekend should provide that, and then some.

there wasn't any really serious chance i was going to hitch to the dte to see tool in the summer of 2017, and pay a sum to get in that i don't even want to know about. i hope people that go have a good time.

i might have seen tera melos on the 13th, but i'd probably have walked out critical of it.

more likely would be noveller on the 14th, but i saw her here a few years ago, already. and, that show is cheap enough that i could maybe sell some cds....

it was just a quick run through, granted. i will need to do a more serious run next week. but, i did not immediately see any reason why i'd want to save my june spending money.

and, i'm consequently cleared to run this through.

i will need to put the $320 down on the 31st, first thing in the morning. with the $670 for rent, $30 for internet and $60 for hormones, that's going to leave me with about $50 for food for the first two weeks - unless i spend less than $300, of course. i'll get $60 in around the 10th. so, that's a little over $100. i budget for $200, but can eat well on $150 for one month. i have backups of most things. i'm really only going to need to buy perishables like fruit, bread, cheese and eggs - and i can do that for $130, if not $100. so, if i spend $250 instead of $300 this weekend, that will work itself out.

at the end of the day, i'm only throwing away $20 to do this. and, it doesn't seem like i'm throwing anything away in june...

yeah.

i'm doing it..

they're open at 8:00.

i'm really just ordering my thoughts...

there's a payday loan company in windsor with a $300 for $20 deal on.

yes, i'll make sure there's nothing hidden.

that's going to get me to 3 of 4 days, at least. it'll be 4 if i stretch it to the max possible; more realistic is that it's three days, andi only spend something like $250.

if i do this, i'll be in for june, and probably need to cut my diet down a little - although that extra $50 is probably the difference.

i'm not sure it's worth it, yet. i have a few hours, still...

worst case, i could try and sell a few cds mid-month. or maybe try the same trick again. yeah, i know that that's how they get you, but so long as it's a $20 fee and i'm confident i'll catch up in a month or two, it's not so terrible. the thing you have to stop yourself from doing is not realizing fees. i'm too smart to get tricked, and too humble to get done in by arrogance. they won't get me on this.

and, i'll sue if anybody gets dishonest.

i'm seriously considering exploring it, anyways. i mean, i get paid on wednesday at midnight. and i can make my budget work for $320, even though i know i probably won't spend it all. it's really honestly just an advance for a week - although it's also going to honestly take away the whole of june, too.

hrmmn.

i guess i need to check june listings, too.

this is a very strong set.



unfortunately, it may be the only set worth attending tomorrow. well, tonight.

and, i don't actually know that the set tomorrow will be like this one, either.

the update on the weather is that it's not the best night, although it actually seems like the overnights are all comparable, it's the days that are going to be different temperatures.

not lining up well... but i have a few more hours to think about it...

i hope julian assange leverages himself and finds a way to build ecuador the nicest fucking embassy you've ever seen.