i have still yet to find evidence of any actual, deleted posts - despite a lot of feeling like something is missing.

but, that's going to change soon, as i sort through these archives, if the posts don't magically reappear....

i don't know what's next, if i do find deleted posts.

the iranian stuff is still gone, though.

again: i have this backed up. i'm going to repost it. it's easier if it just magically fixes itself.

some of the posts i couldn't find before are hidden in here:

https://dsdfghghfsdflgkfgkja.blogspot.com/2018_09_09_archive.html

that was one of my test phrases, and i found it.

trudeau freely handed the supreme court to the right.

and, i don't think he ever even figured it out.

can you get your head around this?

trudeau wins a majority government in 2015.

in 2017, the chief justice resigns. so, we should get to replace her with a liberal appointee, right?

instead, the idiots put together a "non-partisan body" run by a former conservative prime minister (who was never elected), and she picks what is the most right-wing option available to her.

....and you thought merrick garland was bad, right? 

that said, i don't like this new chief justice much, and don't like his arguments much, either. he strikes me as kind of a hack, and maybe the best example of critical legal theory that i've ever seen.

there wasn't any good reason to defer specifically to "peace, order and good government", which is this goofy phrase that nobody else in the history of the country has ever taken remotely seriously. i mean, it's a joke.

the reality is that the law simply doesn't infringe on the division of powers, and the ruling should have just kept to the point. by using this stupid phrase that makes everybody cringe, he's putting in place a can of worms - it's giving the federal government almost free reign.

it follows that while the outcome of the ruling is correct, the ruling itself could create a lot of problems down the road, as the government cites this broad authority to overrule the division of powers, something that wasn't in any way necessary to put in place in order to uphold the law.

i was sorry to see beverly mclaughlin go and expected a bad chief justice to replace her. in a sense, it's a function of how long she was in control for. but, as with everything else, the fact is that the pmo fucked this up - they let the conservatives pick the justice. idiots....

let's just hope this new guy doesn't make it to 75 and the next one is better, and reflects a better process put in place to pick it.

the court case against the carbon tax was never serious, and there was never any serious possibility that it was going to get struck down.

it was a political stunt by some conservative politicians at the political level that, at best, were citing the american constitution rather than our own - but were at truth just spouting demagoguery to idiots.

that is all.

so, i ate too much this morning and passed out, but i'm wide awake now.

i'm finishing up the big post i posted before i fell asleep last night, first. and, again - it seems like a lot of conversations have been cut up by somebody.

i should be able to rebuild these posts. eventually, at least. but, the easiest thing to do is just put everything back in place, so i don't have to.

again - i don't think it's google. google has shown me how it reacts to posts it doesn't like. so, what's really going on, then?

hannnibal in the alps is very much like napoleon in russia. it's easy to ask "why didn't he know better?", but that's the point - he'd never been to the alps, and he had no idea how bad it really was.

as more time goes on, though, and that new bridge gets closer to completion, the need to be right downtown dries up more and more. they're building bike lines over the bridge, meaning i'll be able to get home at 3:00 am - i won't need to wait for the bus under the tunnel in the morning. so, the sandwich-lasalle area becomes more and more appealing.

i liked up, actually - it's one of my 3 or 4 favourite rem discs.

....even if these demos were actually completed and released first, temporally.

today's post is inri012, and you'll note that i'm closing in on the first two official lps - inri015 and inr021.

===

the roots of this track are a variation on a common theme. this is taken from the write-up for the initial 1996 demo version of the track: 

"more silly teenage angst, intersecting with more rejection of religion and quite a bit of misanthropy. i may make an interesting observation or two, but the reality here is that i sound just as brainwashed as the masses of people i was looking down on...and if i'm going to criticize myself, or feel embarrassed, it's on that level of a lack of originality, rather than the actual content. " 

by 1998, the lyrics had been rewritten to be a little less angsty in an attempt to expand further on the secular humanist basis of the track. yet, i still don't really get over the irony inherent in the track. as much as i want to break free of mindlessness and conformity, i don't have anything particularly original to say. worse, the way i'm saying it is cliched, childish and kind of trite. for these reasons, i've decided to eject the vocal mixes from the official release altogether, although they are available here as a part of the download. 

musically speaking, i initially actually wanted this track to be the basis of something more marketable. i remember listening to the first side of the initial demo and lamenting that it was void of anything i could really release as a single and then trying to come up with some kind of "jangle" or "college" rock thing to compensate for it. in the end, the track would warp into some kind of adult prog, but you can hear the initial buckian template in the guitar work. 

as with a number of the other tracks from this period, i don't really want to walk anything back - i just wish that i had articulated myself better. it's not the subject matter that's cringey, it's the exact choice of words. yet, that's a scant excuse, in context. word choice is what writing is all about! 

the decision to create a single for the track in 2016 was drawn out by two considerations. the first is that there are legitimately two distinct modern versions of the track, along with a collection of discarded mixes, and i do feel the need to offer them together as a package, as i have done with the other tracks. the other is that this is literally the only song on the first demo that is not otherwise offered in this format. i felt that it would be absurd for me to offer every track as a single except for this one. 

the lead track on this single combines the album version with the connector that follows it on the record, which explains the chosen release date (the actual song was completed on march 22, 1998). that connector is one of the many pieces of sample art that i had created over this period in cool edit, using a number of basic manipulation tactics and noise generation techniques. i had to emulate this in 2016 in order to rebuild the record. while the result is not identical, it is actually pretty close. 

initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. a failed rescue was attempted in 2013. reclaimed june 29, 2015. corrected to control for malfunctioning electronics on nov 26, 2015. sequenced on jan 10, 2016. released & finalized on july 24, 2016. as always, please use headphones. 

the album version of this track appears on my first record, inri (inri015): jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inri-3 

this recording is a part of the following collections: 

1) inriℵ0: jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/flac-dvd-disc-volume-1 

2) inriℵ1: jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inri-box-set 

3) inriℵ4: jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/mp3-dvd-disc-volume-1 

4) inriℵ6: jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/period-1 

5) inriℵ17: jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/flac-bd-disc-volume-1 

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1996, 1998, 2013, 2015, 2016). 

released may 22, 1998 

j - guitars, effects, bass, drum programming, drum kit, sequencing, vocals, sampling, found sound (printer), cool edit, digital wave editing, tapes, production

windsor is not a small city, by geography. the difference across windsor is not much less than the difference from gloucester to bell's corners, and it has it's kanatas and orleans in the form of towns like amherstburg and leamington. it's a little smaller, in terms of geography...

but, it's a third quarter the population size.

the reason is that it's an old city that never built up. there's no skyscrapers, and few apartments. what does exist here is 50+ years old.

and, that's the root of the problem - we're bringing in thousands and thousands of people, and just don't have anywhere to put them.

a statistic like "average rental prices" is not very useful to me because i'm probably not moving into an apartment building. i'm at the bottom of the market, and i'm competing with refugees and international students, who tend to get the best spots because they receive preferential treatment by the authorities and/or are actually brought here from india by the ponzi scheme rentier scammers. 

like, it's not like they get here and start looking. no. the indian rentiers bought up all the cheap propety and put the ads up in india, and then bring them in. they advertise on kijiji, but they don't call you back. so, the result is that huge swaths of the city are taken off the market.

worse, there's a handful of local property companies - the worst is marda - that have bought up the remaining properties, and seem to have agreements with the local governments for refugee resettlement. they'll leave units open and sit on them - they won't rent to white people "on welfare". it's like they've taken over a government contract, like the state outsourced the process. and, the result is that you can't find bottom tiered housing here anymore unless you're brought in from overseas, explicitly - either by the university or by the government.

and, the few small property owners out there are all ethnically driven. i can get a white person to  rent to me, maybe - and maybe those white people won't rent to brown people. but, this city has a high minority population, and the brown people won't rent to the white people, either. so, my skin colour is kind of frustrating, actually, given that my ancestry is more southern than northern (although i'm both).

listen: i've been searching through this market for years, and i've figured this out.

i won't get through the property companies like marda, but i can hope the ponzi scheme slumlords take a break and i get a chance to move in while they're chasing something else. the wrench is that they might sell to retirees moving in from toronto, in which case the market just dries up - and the school is going to find itself with a housing problem, as the issue becomes critical.

i wanted to get some sleep before i started but i slept too long and now i need to overeat again.

i've been sleeping evenings recently, which is nothing new. i used to sleep in the evening to avoid my family, when i was in university; for now, it's probably a decent way to avoid the smoking pigs upstairs, although it's at least 50% better in here since i cleaned - which isn't a fucking invitation. but, i've blocked off many of the worst entry points, leaving the ceiling as the last remaining serious point of seepage. what that means is that i probably won't notice if people decide to smoke on the patio or the outside steps, but smoking upstairs is still a huge problem. and, because they're spying on me, they seem to have gotten the point. if these fucking idiot cops up there just take it outside, it probably alleviates most of the conflict from here on in, until they turn that blasted contraption back on for the summer, which is something i'm not looking forward to....

i've tended to just open the window in the summer, but the neighbours around here are all drug addicts, and it's just getting worse. i cracked last year, but can't do that this year - i need to be more productive with my time. so, i'm considering getting a space heater to run in the summer to fight off the air. unfortunately, that probably won't help counteract the sweating tiles; it may even make it worse, as the cause is the difference in temperature outside (hot and humid, here) and the temperature inside (cold and dry). what happens is that the energy difference collides in the basement, and you end with condensation everywhere down here. it  depends on where that collide happens, and i don't know exactly, but i could just make it worse if i increase the gradient in a localized place. that said, i learned last year that increasing the temperature in the whole unit almost entirely eliminates the issues with humidity, until the very end of the year, when he's still running the air and i want him to turn the heat on, instead - then we get the situation where i can't open the window anymore, because it's actually too cold to open the window, but he still won't turn the air off. this vicious period in september or october where the highs are like 19 or 20 degrees will probably undo everything, in the end. that's what happened last year, and actually why i stopped to do the diet - it was too gross in here to actually work, and i had to wait for the floors to sweat the gradient out before i could set up any electronics. if he'd just turn the fucking air off, the floors down here would be bone dry.

and, if i complain it's too cold here and want to move south, he should likewise move further north. i moved here because i wanted a warm, more humid climate, and i just find myself fighting with people that live here and seem like they'd be happier with the climate in winnipeg or edmonton or something. the pleasantly hot & humid summers were a selling point for me for windsor....don't ruin it with the disgusting air conditioning....move to the tundra if that's what you want and let me enjoy the regional climate...

i didn't move here to get a high a/c bill - i moved here because i like the heat and humidity and want to enjoy it.

i was hoping i could get out of here and move somewhere where i could open the window without getting smoked on. but, i think i'm stuck here. so, i dunno. it's still not clear what's happening to rent prices, as the rent is this city is artificially inflated by a cabal of rentiers catering to the influx of international students. the university is supposed to be building housing to offset that, but i doubt it will work, because it's an ethnic ponzi scheme. but, this is driven purely by capital and is therefore deeply shortsighted. so, if it finally crashes this summer...

but, let's hope i'm at least awake now.

i need to finish the thought in starting on the alter-reality. what i ultimately want is a rough outline and a set of release dates and i think i have one on the pc, but i want to understand where my head was at, first. soon.

as mentioned, i'll need to spend a week or two catching up when i get my head around it.

so, let me start with some normal early morning posts, get myself a huge meal and segue into rebuilding the pc before 10:00ish, hopefully. and let's hope the idiots can take idiot hour outside tonight. it's been relatively warm out...