"they made you sleep outside?"

to begin with, i didn't sleep.

but, actually, they didn't - they asked me several times to come in, and then they got a blanket for me, and tried to get me to drink water (which i didn't want to drink, because it was making me vomit). they told me point blank to come in and sleep inside. repeatedly. if anything, they seemed a little insulted that i wouldn't come in.

given my difficulties speaking at the time, i may have failed in trying to explain that i was going to get a coffee as soon as i could get up. but, i thought that was going to be before 7:00. my first bus back on saturday mornings is 5:55, so if i was going to get a coffee and sip on it for a bit, i would have wanted to leave around 5:00, or even a bit before, depending on when the night quieted down. they were trying to pull me inside well before that, and for quite a while at that. it just didn't make sense for me to go in and sleep at 3:30 when i was planning on leaving as soon as my body worked the toxins out. and, i didn't want to fall asleep there and miss my bus, because i left my 8:00 meds at home.

on top of that, i would have likely had to have been lifted in. i needed more than an arm. i'm not joking - i couldn't walk. i tend to get insular in these situations, and refuse to move unless somebody that i know and trust offers a hand. as kind as these strangers were, i have a lot of faith in the persistence of gravity and am pretty much always going to insist on getting up on my own, which means not getting up at all until i can.

in hindsight, i'm glad they got that blanket - i guess they realized i wasn't getting up as soon as i thought. but, i wasn't outside due to lack of trying to get me in; i just really wasn't able to get up, and consequently wasn't willing to be moved. further, if i was able to get up at all, i would have left.