no, i'm not going to stand up for an outdated, patriarchal institution that i've spent my whole life arguing against.

i'm going to stand up for the rights of the child.

birth parents do not own their children, and do not have rights to raise them, or really any special authority over them at all. all of the rights in this situation belong to the child. and, the court needs to always have the rights of the child at the centre of it's decision making. policy should be written to accommodate this, not frustrate it.

the reality is that separation is in the best interests of the child in the vast majority of these situations.

but, i will repeat that i understand that this is not the reason underlying the policy, either.