well, see, i'd rather interpret this as a well-deserved insult to lettuce, which is basically useless. check the nutritional components. you'd might as just have a glass of water. i've long made a habit of holding the lettuce, as it's just entirely pointless and simply takes up too much space. when you get off it for a while, getting something with lettuce starts to taste like you left it underwater.

www.theweathernetwork.com/news/articles/the-one-way-lettuce-is-actually-worse-for-you-than-bacon/61296/