Thursday, September 4, 2025

unfortunately, it seems as though bruce willis has completely forgotten that he was supposed to die hard.

the way this works is that the synapse that remembers he's supposed to die hard is trapped in an area of his brain that is slowly collapsing, and a flood of dangerous proteins is slowly filling up the lobe, threatening to dissolve the synapse. the synapse has 24 hours to block the proteins, and regenerate elsewhere. the synapse will be aided by a young rick moranis, who for some reason is a micrometre tall, and is screaming at everybody to stop fucking calling him bob.