i mean, i understand that there's a physical reality to the addiction.

this isn't a choice...

but i simply don't want this.

you can't even get me to watch a 30 minute tv show. how are you going to get me to waste entire weekends on drugs?

again: i'm just feeling indigestion, right now. it's not serious. i'm probably being paranoid. but, it's just not going to happen; it's not going to be a situation where i'm forcing myself to give up something i like for my health, but a situation where i'm eager to clear something i don't like out of my system, at whatever pain that comes with it.