"so, you want a lockdown?"
oh, yeah. cases are out of control...it's all those covidiots, surely. i saw it on twitter, so it must be true.
"right. well, i'm looking at this data..."
oh, data. great. i bet it confirms that 95% of cases are spread by drunks. alcohol - the cause of the world's problems.
"actually, it says that roughly half of the cases are being spread by schools."
no way. that's not what it said on twitter.
"yup. guess you want to shut the schools down, right?"
well...i want to follow the data. but, what am i going to do with my kids? i have one of them in daycare, but the other one's not old enough, yet. so, no - i think i'd support an exception.
"you think you deserve an exception. i see."
well, i have to go to work, right? what's the second thing on the list.
"daycares. but, you said you don't want to cancel those."
no way. i'll need an exception for that, too.
"indeed. call it the middle class privilege exception, i guess."
yeah. i guess. what's third?
"workplaces. but, you want another exception, don't you?"
well, i have to go to work.
"you could take the benefits the government is handing out."
me? on welfare?
"so, you want another exception. you sure are a special snowflake, aren't you?"
i don't like this conversation anymore. i'll have you thrown out of here.
"aww. you're offended."
i'm sorry. i'm going to go to confession.
"hey, you know what number four is, huh?"