there is no question that the ideal outcome of the previous move would have been to stay here; i'll take the payout in lieu of it, but what i really want is stability.

that's clearly not an option, as i'm being bombarded with smoke from every direction and nobody seems to care.

so, i have to make the best of a bad situation and accept compensation for negligence; but, sure, i'd rather people weren't negligent, and i'd rather people were respectful of my rights to breathe carcinogen-free air and not get randomly stoned when i'm trying to read. yeah. sure. that's too much to ask of these people, apparently.

but, i can't repeat the same mistake of moving into a smoky apartment, either.

in the end, i'm not concerned about "winning". this isn't a game. there aren't "winners" and "losers" in most things in life, that's a bunch of fucking neo-liberal stupidity, there are compromises and consequences and adjustments and settling for reality.

and, what i want is stability, at some point, in the end.