ok, so this. i forgot about this. umm...
i think i was trolling, but i think i was also applying the disturbed pathologies i was exploring in these songs to people around me and realizing that maybe we're all fucked up inside in our own different ways. there's actually somewhat of a message of egalitarian social reform buried in this. are any of us really 'better' than any of the rest of us, or are we all guided by the same contemptible, morbid fantasies? a little cliched, but...
....i think i was mostly just trolling.
i was also coming to the point where i had finished exploring what i wanted to explore and wanted to shift directions, thematically. the song is meant to be a sort of a summary of what i'd written previously, offering a conclusion.
i should also trigger this. the attempt was to be shocking on a dark humour level rather than seriously disturbing, but it's at least somewhere near that line that separates out good taste.
recorded in april, 1997. remastered on nov 8, 2013.