i've been telling myself that i'm better off waiting either for subsidized housing - which is probably the only non-smoking housing in the entire city - or hoping i can win these lawsuits and buy some property.

but, this is becoming intolerable. i don't want to live like this.

if i have another day or two like this, i'm going to need to get another drug test and consider filing. given how secretive he's being about it, the drug test is probably the only way i'm going to prove anything...