so, you may find yourself frustrated when things more or less carry on as they always did.

can't you see that all they did was change their clothes?

the actual role of almost all of these positions is to act as a front, or a spokesperson for the deep state.

this is just a reminder that, while there are always some exceptions, the vast majority of people that biden is going to pick to do this or that are going to be handed scripts written by the civil service, that does all of the actual work.

so, with notable distant exceptions, it really actually doesn't matter who he picks to do what.

...and he'd might as well just fill it with whomever he thinks looks nicest.

i want to be done with this, but i want to finish it too....

*sigh*

why do i keep doing this - starting these projects i think will take a day and end up taking a year?

ugh.

the other thing is, like...

i don't want to passively brush my teeth in 10% nanohydroxyapatite and hope it works, slowly.

i want to aggressively bombard my mouth with it, with constant contact, in everything, for weeks.

so, here's what i can get when i go to the dentist:

1) i've located pure, powdered calcium carbonate in windsor. i can pick that up when i go out.

2) i cannot locate pure, powdered nanohydroxyapatite (powdered tooth enamel). there are some supplements bound to magnesium, which aren't useful for this purpose. i sent an email to an engineering company asking them to send me a baggie for a $20.

3) i looked up the ingredients for the various nanohydroxyapatite toothpastes, and every single one of them either had some kind of sugar in them or had something acidic in them :\. well, except the expensive one, apagard - that seems ok. the only one available in stores has carrageenan in it, and i went over that - that breaks down into sugar in the presence of amylase. the risewell looks like it might be ok, but it's full of all kind of weird shit like lemon peels. call me skeptical about brushing my teeth with lemon peels. so, i may need to get the powder in bulk, somehow.

for whatever reason, i never vomit. i know i'm really sick when i vomit.

it's been years and years. and years....

i push everything out the other way, instead.

like i say, i know how this works - i'm expecting a ridiculous movement that would no doubt bring tears of pride to my parents' eyes. you wouldn't believe something like that could possibly come from little me. and, yet, it's been the norm since i moved to this diet.

i think it's just too much.

but, i'll do the experiment tonight.

it's had too many chances to be random.

it's repeat, now.

relief seems to be more connected to bowel excretion, so it seems more likely that the pain is in the intestine.

and, this is a "familiar" pain - if this was a bladder attack, you'd think it would be a weird sensation i don't realize. it's not. it's just a stomach ache....

it feels like food poisoning, and maybe it is, still. but, whatever is causing it needs to be identified and removed.

the pain is sharp and it's very low in my gut. 

so, it's either in my intestine - which is what i thought at first - or in my bladder. if it's in my bladder, the beets are the most likely culprit, unfortunately, and i'll have to take them out. but, if it's in my intestine, it could be total fibre, and i'd be more likely to take the carrots out first.

i'll have to do the experiment.

it's diet-related, clearly. i'm not sick - it's what i'm eating.

i've been through this enough now that i know how it ends, anyways - it pushes through in hard, dry, fibrous feces, of fishing story proportions. and, then i'm fine.

so, it's either something specific...or it's too much fibre at once. and, that is something that happens when you eat too much fibre.

the meal has 55 g of pasta, 110 g of carrots, 82 g of beets and 175 g of red peppers. the root vegetables are particularly compact and probably the culprit, if it's fibre.

but, i don't know, really.

i should start next time by eating one component of the meal at a time and seeing how i react to each one, and stopping when or if i get sick again.

i am not aware of any allergies.

i may have found one.

i thought i was sick, i thought it was food poisoning....

no, it's the item.

it's consistent.

ok, i'm facing the facts.

there is something in my pasta meal that my stomach just does not like, and i'm going to need to isolate it and remove it.

i may even be allergic to it, in which case i may be playing with fire.

it might be the beets.

what do i think this syndrome is?

it's probably a parasite.

i would suggest that us bureaucrats wear tinfoil hats when in cuba.

what nonsense.

you know they're going to blame climate change on the russians in the end, right?

https://www.ctvnews.ca/health/report-says-u-s-diplomats-likely-targeted-in-energy-attack-unsure-about-canadians-1.5219029

and, yes, you can get too much fluoride.

just like you can get too much sodium.

or too much calcium.

maybe it's actually that simple.

maybe cavities are a consequence of fluoride deficiency. like, for real - maybe that's how it should be viewed, clinically. maybe that should be how the disease is formulated.

maybe dentists should say "you have a fluoride deficiency" to people that come in and tell them they have toothaches.

so, people will say "fluoride isn't a nutrient, because no disease comes from it's deficiency."

but, clearly, a disease does come from it's deficiency - namely, cavitation.

we're just so lost in whiteness that we can't see it.

well, it's kind of weird that we claim that "healthy" means "most susceptible to cavities", don't you think?

what "healthy" really means is "normal from the perspective of a white person". but, that is also "normal from the perspective of people that drink water from the least fluoridated sources on the planet".

to an african, "normal" looks like fluorosis.

and, they get far less cavities, per capita, even when they eat shit.

so, who has more healthy teeth, really?

i just hope it's not too late.

maybe this is the actual truth:

so, yes - i'm aiming for fluorosis.

if i can get it.

apparently, it's hard to get fluorosis as an adult...

people with "fluorosis" might have funny white spots on their teeth, and stupid white people might think it's unattractive.

but, they don't get cavities.

what we call "fluorosis" may, in truth, just be what we evolved to produce - that might be the most healthy teeth.

and, what we call "normal" may, in truth, be a deficiency, as a result of consuming poorly mineralized water.

fucking white people, huh?

The mean fluoride level in ground water and the prevalence of dental fluorosis were pooled from eleven and nine primary studies conducted in Ethiopian Rift Valley respectively. The pooled mean level of fluoride in ground water therefore was 6.03 mg/l (95% CI; 4.72–7.72, p < 0.001) and the pooled prevalence of dental fluorosis among residents in Ethiopian rift valley was 32% (95% CI: 25, 39%, p < 0.001), 29% (95% CI: 22, 36%, p < 0.001) and 24% (95% CI: 17, 32%, p < 0.001 for mild, moderate and sever dental fluorosis respectively. The overall prevalence of dental fluorosis is 28% (95% CI, 24, 32%, p < 0.001).

https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-019-7646-8

it's interesting to note that the fluoride content in the natural water sources in ethiopia - where we all come from - is amongst the highest in the world.

so, it's easy to say that we don't have fluoride in our natural occurring water, so it's "unnatural" to add it.

....except that, if you go to the rift valley, where we evolved, they do have fluoride naturally occurring in their water - and at higher levels then we add it, anywhere.

so, then, if i'm going to do a fluoride treatment, i should do it in the presence of hydroxyapatite, rather than space it out. i want the fluoride to absorb with the hydroxyapatite.

for now, i should make sure that i'm mixing the high fluoride with the novamin, which has the same ions, but in a different combination.

again: i don't know why that wouldn't work, if the ph is high.

i can buy hydroxyapatite - both in powder and in toothpaste.

so, why wouldn't your body deposit this if you give it fluoride + hydroxyapatite?

i'm also realizing that crest produces a lot of fake news.

but, let's take this at face value - it's claiming that you can catch the hydroxyapatite when it dissolves, and put it back in by replacing the hydroxyl group with fluoride.

https://www.dentalcare.com/en-us/professional-education/ce-courses/ce410/fluoride-s-mechanism-of-action

i suppose it would then follow that that won't work anymore if you don't have any hydroxyapatite to catch. that is, the efficacy of fluoride would rely on the existence of degrading enamel to work.

but, that doesn't rule out uptake, it just presents a challenge - you need to introduce hydroxyapatite somehow, and i grasp that this has eluded engineers. but, that's why we have novamin, instead.

it also opens up a lot of questions about whether a partially decayed tooth can be restored using that mechanism. in theory, it should be possible for your saliva to take dissolved hydroxyapatite from a healthy part of your tooth and uptake it into a damaged part using fluoride. in theory, it should even be possible for your saliva to take dissolved hydroxyapatite from one tooth and redeposit it in another. how would it figure any of that out?

regardless, it seems like i want to find ways to get something like hydroxyapatite in there, and i knew that already. i get a lot of calcium, a lot of phosphorus, a lot of vitamin d, etc. the only thing i was missing was fluoride, and i've addressed that.

that clarifies a little, but it doesn't resolve the contradiction.