i was born in 1981 - not 1991, not 2001. 1981. so, how old am i? who are some other people born in that year?
1) beyonce, and google images of her at the grammies to see that she's now an older lady
2) britney spears, who has looked older than her years for quite some time, now. i don't have wrinkles like that, thankfully.
3) paris hilton, who has aged relatively well, but is definitely not going to pass as a young person anymore
4) meghan markle, who has maybe aged better than all of them, but is definitely not going to be mistaken for a young person
5) natalie portman, who appears to be experiencing hair loss.
6) ivanka trump, who is actually the counter-example, here.
7) jessica alba
8) serena williams
these are women that are, without exception, entering or already in middle age - and that cannot pass as young people.
and, if you want to be silly and compare me to a dude, look up how old these guys look
1) justin timberlake
2) tom hiddleston. yes. i'm the same age as tom hiddleston.
3) casey neistat
4) devendra banhart
5) brandon flowers
and, you'll note i was born 13 days into 1981, so who was born in 1980?
- kim kardashian
- christina aguilera
- win butler
- tegan quin
- jessica simpson
- conor oberst
i'm trying to pick easily recognizable people. i'm not really a fan of any of these people. but, look at those people - or bring your existing preconceptions of them to your mind - and then look at me and put the proper references into place.
i wasn't born in the 90s. i was barely even born in the 80s.
so, congratulate me for looking young - thank you.
but, understand that i have the health requirements - and habits - of somebody that is a little older than i look, and not somebody that is literally half my age.