so, why do i go to straight bars, again?

again: because i don't want to get hit on by men. it's the same reason that cis-women go to gay bars, just spun around the other way.

i have enough experience regarding this to know that gay men WILL grope me. every gay bar i've been to in every city i've been to one in has ended the same way, which is pushing some horny boy off me. even gay guys in straight clubs hit on me.

i'm not into it, i never have been.

i may get hit on mildly by women at straight clubs, but that's far less annoying than getting mauled by gay men. and, i frankly don't care if i piss off the straight dudes.

but, let it be clear that the point of conflict is with straight men, primarily.

yes, i've met the odd hetero ciswoman that gets catty and jealous and competitive, and they get can get downright nasty with me, but i tend to avoid spaces where those kind of women congregate - the ciswomen in the spaces i go to are mostly goths and hippies and nerds and if they're feeling this urge to destroy me then they don't act on it.

no, the primary problem comes from cismen, and there's two underlying reasons:

1) they can't fuck me, and are uncomfortable with how they're feeling about it.
2) their girlfriends are eying me, and even if they don't end up talking to me it's still giving them ideas.

i don't think i'd be better off in a lesbian bar, i'd just open up a more confusing can of worms.

i just need straight/open bars that aren't specifically trying to build a business model around access to young women. that's the situation where i'm going to run into problems, as i become a kind of poor product, as access is what the bar is actually selling. then, the straight men start bitching about it because i'm just taking up space in the bar.

detroit is going through an unfortunate police crackdown this summer. hopefully, better late night options present themselves moving into the fall.