Sunday, December 14, 2025

this is not a year-end, best of 2025 list. i haven't had time in recent years.

but you'll note that i maintain a np: list accessible from the link list on the right hand side of the page, because i am forever stuck in the 90s, and in my mind this page is really just about me arguing with myself over usenet.

this is a collection of short, first impression reviews of music i listened to this year. it's less a best of list and more an.....np: list. it's just a list of albums i've listened to, with first impressions.

i'll update this a few times before the end of the year.

green means go, B+, A-, A, A+
yellow means proceed carefully, C+, B-, B
orange means proceed only with extreme caution, X, E

otherwise, my suggestion is don't bother with it (F, D-, D, D+, C-, C).

note that only new releases from 2025 receive a colour code.

and i guess we'll get something like a best of out of this after all. i'll reorganize it eventually.

four tet into dust (still falling) 2025 uk+ire C- is this what four tet sounds like nowadays?
floating points corner of my eye 2025 uk+ire C- not very exciting.
beau mahadev subterra 2025 us C+ low key contemporary pop. it's a little generic, but i like the general style.
xenia repair gambling 2025 uk+ire F a trance record that never drops. no joke.
Paolino Canzoneri Pittura liquida e gocce di lacrime 2025 italy D aimless, shapeless sound.
58918012 ordered chaos 2025 ukraine D go nowhere jams that demonstrate limited musical talent and ability and are published with minimal editing.
ulla strauss hometown girl 2025 germany F boring.
goo ⊚ ⧂⫯ ☌ 2025 us F aimless, unlistenable. pretentious schlop.
mifu i love music 2025 poland B+ this record combines electric and classical guitar work with fairly freeform laptop generated noise collages. it is at times fairly sparse and unwritten and at times more dense and written up. i've listened to it enough to let it sort itself out a little and while i like the general sound and idea and approach, i have to point out that it requires a little more work, too. it's only the length of an ep and feels like one song rather than a record. i'm going to recommend this, but with the clarification that it's a tease rather than an lp.
ewa sad lolopianko 2025 poland D these are very short tracks that seem designed for commercial use rather than to be listened to as art. that said, they are mildly interesting as teasers, but they aren't songs and this isn't a record.
p wojtaszek trik 2--->3 2025 poland D i dont speak polish or any other slavic dialect, so i don't understand what they're saying. musically, it bounces around between a few genres, but not very well.
jhl concertina 2025 poland F the bryan adams cover is unforgivably bad. i let her finish, but it didn't matter after that.
blue steel age of bloom 2025 poland C- generic synth music.
koinen moth, flame and the magic plastic 2025 us C- uneventful. generic. goes nowhere. boring.
julek ploski nullcycle (reawoken) 2025 poland B this is apparently a remix album with remixes by other artists of julek ploski originals from 2024, which i haven't heard. it's glitchier and less constructed than the previously reviewed record, which is not in it's benefit.
julek ploski give up channel 2025 poland A- i prefer my electronic music to be both melodic and abstract in order to be interesting. this record doesn't accomplish anything in terms of production or composition, but it's extremely well put together and a more enjoyable listen than the generic pop i've been trudging through. there's a playfulness underlying the more difficult presentation that is key to having it succeed as music and not just being a pretentious exercise in difficult sound art. i have to spend the time sorting through the shit to find the interesting records or i won't find them. this could be filed under experimental/electronic or under 20th century classical, which i suppose ought to be the definiton for 21st century classical. there are some goofy samples, but they don't drag the record down the way the cheese does in the previously reviewed album. this is well done and recommended.
death's dynamic shroud the lunar curtain II 2025 us E an overly pretentious attempt at some of the worst elevator music i've ever heard. the vocal tracks suck. however, the record improves slightly if you just completely delete the first five insufferably pretentious tracks and start it at track 6, which is the most interesting track on the record. this hatchet work still results in a failing attempt at art music, and the vocal tracks are still loaded with cheese, but it cuts out the worst of the stench. the hesitation i'm having with just throwing this in the dung heap is that, despite the fact that it's repeatedly objectively terrible in it's repeated use of tired genre cliches and it's cringing application of the worst kind of cheese in the vocal work, there are a handful of interesting moments that largely come up in the sequencing structures. they just constantly ruin the sporadically novel sequencer work by burying it in these layers of cliches and cheese and these awful vocals. this is a characteristic of gen y music more generally - even when they are trying as hard as they can, it still sucks. i guess that's a characteristic of gen y more generally, though; even when they try their hardest, they still fail. life's tough, kids.
new gaia terragaia 2025 us C this is a little more eventful, but it's still lacking, and that is intentional - it's the genre. i have no idea what this has to do with science fiction. however, i actually spent quite a while with this genre about 15 years ago, before i got distracted by a developing art-punk scene, and there are sufficient counter-examples, but they are on the margins of a genre that is on the margin. that is what i need to do to find music i like; i constantly seek the deepest cuts in the obscurest genres. this guy seems to want to generate too many songs. he might be well advised to create less total sound and focus more on developing the more abstract side of his sound. for example, i think the second track on this record samples freak out by frank zappa and in the process creates tones and dynamics that you don't often hear in this kind of post-idm elevator music that jazz-focused electronic musicians have championed as fashionable over the last ten years, but then the rest of the record falls into this rut of prodding, slow motion keyboard jazz with almost no variation. if he released ten albums last year and each of them has one or two tracks that are more interesting like the one i pointed out, he might actually have created enough material for a good lp last year, but it's scattered across too much lacklustre material and hard to pull together. this is something i see a lot in this genre, where some amount of the music is being created by template (and maybe increasingly by ai), so it's easy to create a groove and think you're doing something solid that people will like, when you're not, you're just generating the same thing that the last guy that used this program generated and doing something that's going to get skipped by most.
fm skyline & equip music 2 2025 us C- i wasn't the kid that grew up playing video games, i was the kid that read too many books. they aren't necessarily mutually exclusive categories, but they usually were. so, i don't have a connection to these archaic cultural references, even if i mostly know what they're about. rather, i am a fan of jazz fusion music, in it's various forms, going back to miles davis, and before him. as a musician and music lover, i am going to bump into this kind of thing frequently nowadays, and i don't hear much of interest to me, here. sure, this could have been a jazz record released in the late 80s, but it would not have been a memorable one or a very good one. i do, however, have to take note of how far the technology has come over general midi, which i've taken advantage of myself in recent years, but not quite like this. i know that these are midi sequences due to their form, but i couldn't tell strictly based on the sound and that's very unusual. the record is just very slow moving and bland, but that also seems to be intentional.
gumdrop gumdrop 2025 us X this is a curious combination, and i prioritize novelty and creativity above almost everything else in music....except composition. you still gotta write the songs. sometimes, something like this is necessary to get to something else, and sometimes it just rots in obscurity. i don't know how seriously to take this, and i don't know if it intends to be taken seriously, but i can point out that i heard this this year and took note of it. i'm reminded a little bit of an album from 2019 called 1000 gecs that i liked a little bit in terms of being novel but likewise wasn't certain if i should take seriously. that record did very well, over time. this particular combination of chiptune production and screamo-rap vocals may hit me as beyond goofy and difficult to interpret as art, but the kids really like it, and i guess that reflects their decision not to take life seriously. when life gives you lemons, throw them at the cops. yet, it's not vacuous pop music, either; there is some thought put into making this impossible to take seriously and i have to take note of that as performance art, even if i wonder about the songs, themselves. that's the question, here: this is fun and silly, sure, but can you listen to this? i don't know. however, if you've succeeded in perplexing and confusing me, you're doing something right, even if i'm not sure whether you've succeeded in making substantive art, yet. i'm going to grade this as X, for now.
zac traegar the summer sauron turned pretty 2025 us
bestial mouths backbone (12") 2024 us B- this is a 12" single consisting of a handful of the tracks from the remix record released earlier in the year. i can look at items from very late 2024 in my 2025 list, but this is stretching that a bit, as it is a repackaging of remixes released in early 2024 and songs released in 2023. i'm going to nonetheless pull it out as higher quality, if somewhat generic, industrial music. the presence of rhys fulber in the production team is probably responsible for this. i had run across bestial mouths before, but i hadn't spent much time with them, so i'm going to follow this backwards a little bit, and take a detour out of the year end run through to do it.
bootblacks paradise 2025 us C- they seem to have borrowed bily corgan's post-2005 synth effects rack, but this is more early depeche mode knockoffs, which is essentially everything in the genre. the sax work doesn't make these songs from any sort of big chair. maybe songs from a small chair. or a high chair. i'd rather hear songs from an electric chair. songs from the electric chair could actually get pretty intense if it includes recollections of past atrocities, guilt, defiance, remorse and recipes for dorito spaghetti. everybody wants to troll the world.
replicant daybreaker 2025 us C kind of boring electronic pop music.
sierra veins in the name of blood 2025 france B- stripped down modern techno update on a 90s industrial sound. it's enjoyable, but a little primitive.
the ocean / sierra boreal / traum
(split)
2025 germany
/france
C- go nowhere electronic remixes of bland post-metal.
morke to carry on 2025 us C- this is a bit more mellow and more shoegaze on it's face in tone, but in content it's uninspired prog.
blackbraid blackbraid III 2025 us F this is about as stupid and about as generic and about as cliched as you get. i can almost understand a few of the words. does he get to sleipnir? i want a concept record about the fucking horse.
asunojokei thinking of you 2025 japan D it says it's no joke, but it seems like a joke, to me. i can't even tell if this is in english or japanese. why bother singing at all? musically, it's generic.
teardrinker killing the flowers will not delay the spring 2025 netherlands F generic and boring.
agriculture the spiritual sound 2025 us E rock music has slowly become more and more retarded over time; you always had to be a little bit daft to do this well, but by the time corporate emo was taking over, i was done with it, and just listening to jazz. it had become utterly stupid. then, corporate emo inverted on itself in a way nobody predicted, and became the era's progressive rock, and i realized i was going to have to find a way to deal with my disdain for the incredibly stupid cliches in the genre if i wanted to listen to anything calling itself rock at any time in the near future, because the fuckers had taken over the genre, and that was how it was, whether i liked it or not. i never really came around to it, but just as i was finding ways to stomach it, it evolved into something even worse. somebody will yell at me for deriving black metal from screamo, and i know that skips a few steps, but i'm talking about the mainstream rock culture, not the development of the style. if i thought corporate screamo was stupid, black metal was a massive step into full retard, but the same thing was beginning to happen, and there just wasn't a way around dealing with the ubiquity of this new style of rock music if you wanted to find things that were new, as anything at all was going to go through both the screamo bottleneck and then the black metal bottleneck. art rock wasn't going to sound like it used to anymore and you'd have to deal with this, no matter how much you hated it, or you'd have to give up and stick to jazz.

one very weird thing that happened is that this genre that was about killing fags (is that guy still in jail?) got taken over by women, gays and transgendered people, but that didn't make me more interested in it, it just took away a good way to make fun of it.

now, in 2025, it's usurped the core structural norms in progressive rock music, so there's no way around dealing with it, but i'm not convinced that i can. when they just shut up and play, it's not that bad, but i haven't found a way to process this screeching and yelling, yet. i was able to solve this problem during the ubiquitous period of screamo by finding more hardcore or punk sounding vocalists, and waiting until the genre matured to the point where the lyricism was more developed. i haven't really found that path with black metal, yet, and it doesn't make as much sense to look for punk singers in black metal bands, as the history is oppositional. i have only been able to enjoy it when it's instrumental, when it's essentially loud shoegaze or when it features virtuoso guitar playing, like indricothere. i have no interest in the genre cliches: satan is stupid, heavy metal guitar solos are boring and these lyrics are never going to be intelligible in the genre because the point is that they aren't, which makes me disinterested in them. i'm not going to find a small group of evolved, progressive black metal bands that i'm able to appreciate as new art rock, i'm going to continue to cringe at this until the next thing replaces it. the form is fundamentally less redeemable than screamo was, and that makes it pretty awful, as everybody thought screamo must be the absolute bottoming out of western culture. we were wrong.

i have listened to this a few times, and i'll give them an E for effort in terms of trying to be a little bit unpredictable regarding form, but it sucks, as art, and i'm not going to ease up on this the way i eventually forced myself to ease up on screamo. i'm going to have to wait this out. but, i fear the next thing is even worse, like using thoughts to generate pink noise with diodes, and running it through a high gain feedback loop, forcing the listener to decode it with a special fourier transform algorithm that you have to download with the album.
chat pile this dungeon earth / remove your skin please 2019
/
2025
us B- these are repackaged 2019 eps. the thing about this band that confuses me has to do with the accolades it gets for being creative, when it just sounds to me like a rehash of every 90s emo band, and we just went through that a few years ago. this is totally derivative and rehashed 90s rock, it's not this forward thinking music of the future. i dunno. maybe you've never heard any underground screamo from the 90s or something, so maybe this is brand new to you, but it just isn't. therefore, it's overrated. but it's not awful. the other thing that's annoying about it is that it's remarketing 90s hardcore for, like, wifebeater wearing white trash losers, rather than as an outgrowth of punk rock, but that existed at the time, too, and it's more of an effect than a cause; that's real life, and i acknowledge it, i just don't like it. there's worse music out there, but there's better rock bands than this right now, too. the basic point is that the question as to what it might have sounded like if ian curtis lived and joy division went hardcore instead of new wave has already been answered many times.
chat pile in the earth again 2025 us C+ i've found this band to be overrated for years. this is also overrated.
bleeth marionette 2025 us C the theme in post-rock has been cliched and prodding for a while now, with few counter-examples. this isn't one of them. the problem is that this is fun to play, right? it's loud, it's cathartic. but it's all identical and it's been this way for 20 years, with few musicians looking to transcend it. it's not that this sucks, it's that i've heard this record too many times, already. but i'd probably go see the show if it was down the street.
spotlight rarities 2025 us C this is an outtakes disc, granted, but it seems cliched and prodding.
wednesday bleeds 2025 us C in recent decades, as rock music has become more obscure, american rock music has largely settled into a type of country music with power chords, which reflects it's remnant audience base as being rural and white. american rock music now primarily appeals to demographics in republican states, which is weird. this isn't cow punk, but it is sometimes. to enjoy much of what's left of rock music as a genre, you have to have a pre-existing affinity for that strain of country rock as a pre-requisite, and i largely never have. i will need to look a little further underground for noisier, more abrasive forms to get more of what i'm looking for.
gabi gamberg
'daffo'
where the earth bends 2025 us C it's a little light for me, but this person wants to be a singer-songwriter and wants to be taken seriously as one.
jo passed weekend 2025 canada C+ pop musicians need to shift with the pop form. bit of a weezer vibe.
north sea radio orchestra special powers 2025 uk+ire B- this has several of the same people as lost crowns but is a far more listenable record. however, the middle part of the record drags it down a little. it's built like an early 70s pink floyd record in that sense.
lost crowns the heart is in the body 2025 uk+ire E being a trained musician in 2025 is extremely frustrating, as your choices are total obscurity or doing covers of bloated cliches, if you're lucky enough to get a job in the local orchestra. opportunities for creative music production are very meagre. so, you get projects like this.

it's not enough to call this pretentious or even to say it has no commercial potential. this really doesn't go anywhere or do anything. it's complex on it's face (it's less complex than it sounds), but it isn't abstract or creative, it's just purposefully obtuse. it's difficult without being rewarding, as you don't gain anything by being patient with it, or suffering through it. there are reasons that medieval music is so ugly sounding - they had the mathematics of tonality all wrong and were always out of tune - and mimicking that in the era of supercomputers doesn't sound sophisticated, it just sounds out of tune. you want the record to develop at some point, but it doesn't. the drumming is the best part of the record. there's a subset of people that will think they're smart for "understanding" this and call you stupid for rejecting it, but you should not listen to them and take their self-righteousness as irony. when the primary selling point of your record is that somebody could write a phd thesis about it, it's not compelling, by definition. so, you could spend a lot of time with this, but you won't get much out of it in the end - it's awkward, ugly, empty and rotting in it's own filth. like the dark ages.
lake of puppies lake of puppies 1996/
2024
uk+ire these are old demos with william d drake and some other people.
adebisi shank this is the second ep of a band called adebisi shank 2025 uk+ire B+ this is the skipped review of a band called adebisi shank, which is possibly the most hyperactive and cracked out band the math rock era produced. they don't change much from release to release, which i appreciate, as it means you can just fill up the 5 disc changer, or set up a five hour playlist at this point. if you like the other releases, you'll like this too.
foetus succulence 2025 australia A+ jim. the legendary jim. jim is checking out, he says. i'll wait.

this track is a gabrielesque epic, which is something jim did more of in the latter part of his career, with an idiosyncratic big band bombast. because if this is the apocalyse, you should dance down your death march.
jessica moss unfolding 2025 canada B jessica moss is one of a number of musicians that i have followed for a length of time and that has recently made the issue in gaza central to her messaging in a way that i don't agree with, but i wouldn't consider it to be catastrophic. i don't consider jessica moss to be a supporter of hamas or an advocate of genocide against israel, but i recognize that she's uncomfortable with not criticizing an israeli government that she sees as acting in her name in what she thinks is a drastic overreaction. she would appear to be reacting out of embarrassment. she may accuse israel of overreacting to hamas, but i may rather suggest she's underreacting to the threat. i think a lot of people had difficulty grasping the immense level of hatred unleashed on oct 7th and don't want to engage in the difficult discourse attached to weighing realistic policy options available to the state of israel today in confronting 30 years of failed containment policies and consequently getting your head around the fundamental nature of what the existing population of gaza is. it's easier to adopt a humanitarian posture, without acknowledging or accepting that these are people that would cut your arm off for trying to feed them; you would hand them bread, and they would eat your arm. the state of israel bears responsibility in generating the situation, but that doesn't make the set of options available to it any easier. if you leave a dog alone in a cage for months at a time and it grows mean and attacks you when you enter the room, what choice do you have but to euthanize it? but these are not themes that would play out well in jessica moss' group of friends, or help her market her art to the audience she wants to market it to, which wants to talk about resisting state power and is in the process identifying itself as a collection of useful idiots to foreign fascist groups that would gleefully slaughter them for show, she would be the first to go, and in the most gruesome manner imaginable, where it was once a soundtrack for internalizing defiance of the here and now that directly confronts us.

but she composes instrumental classical music.

she generates a lot of sound, and some if it has more thought put into it than some of it that doesn't. this would be more on the jam/improvised side, and you can hear that she's working a lot with reverb and loop pedals to create drone-based soundscapes without doing much with them when she does. it's like building a foundation without constructing a house. it's passively enjoyable for what it is, but it doesnt command much attention; it's missing a lead, melodic instrument, which coud be anything she wants it to be, but which is currently absent. that is not always true of her solo work, but it is frequently true.
tear garden astral elevator 2025 canada C i think this might be the first cevin key project with vst synthesizers. it's....odd....that ka-spel sounds 30 years younger all of a sudden, and i don't know whether to take the claim of goettel contributions seriously, as key has admitted to bullshiting it. what i can say about this is that it's fairly stripped down for tear garden, to it's most basic elements, and while i'm not sure who is ultimately writing it, it's focused less on being abstract and more on being marketable. it's not clear why key would embrace this for tear garden and resist it so strenuously for skinny puppy, which appears to be done, as ogre is frustrated with key for not doing.....this. i dunno. this kind of bullshit has constantly frustrated key's projects since dwayne died in 1995. it's been the same thing over and over.

i would describe the record as lacklustre, but not disappointing because my expectations were not high. these are pop songs, and are supposed to be pop songs.
lingouf cintamini 2025 france B+ lingouf, who has been a well known (in certain circles) underground dj for decades, released this brilliant lp in 2008 that is very different than what he's known for, and i've kept checking back periodically to see if he's tried to expand his sound a little from the very harsh and guttural, distorted beats he is mostly known for, generally without positive results. this record is actually a little more mainstream and contemporary techno, which is neither going to appeal to his core fanbase (who are no doubt too old for that shit now anyways) or the art-techno audience that identified doeme as what it is. this is by no means bad, but it isn't brilliant, either. it's a little generic.
photek call of duty II soundtrack 2023 uk + ire 5 this is the last photek soundtrack release. it's made with stock samples using heavyocity's damage library, which sound like the world music samples peter gabriel collected with a tape recorder and fed into his fairlight cmi in the 80s, put through gated reverbs that he simply didn't have access to, in terms of processing power, but which you can do nowdays on a fancy phone. i think he directly samples reznor's quake soundtrack at one point as well. the entire sampling-for-cinema industry is built on top of the work gabriel did, and in a lot of ways, gabriel did it way better, and has never been eclipsed. i'm sure he got paid for this, and i can't exactly fault the guy, but it's not very interesting as art. that's the point i'm making. which is not to pick on photek exactly but to explain why i'm still listening to squarepusher all of these years later and not listening to photek.
photek the forge 2025 uk + ire D photek did release a single this year, but it's his first release since 2012, except soundtrack work. the point i'm making should be readily obvious.
squarepusher dostrotime 2024 uk+ire A this is the most recent squarepusher record, and when you listen to them back to back you can really hear how the artist has retreated from the techno scene and instead decided to embrace art rock traditions, including a pastoral guitar introduction ripped from nursery cryme and an apparent watcher of the skies remix to start the second track. see, i'm a musician. i like this stuff. that's the point; that's why i'm listening to squarepusher in 2025, and not listening to, say, photek. but this is only techno in aesthetic. it's really more like electronic prog. because the only drummer i'm aware of that could play this shit (it's programmed, nobody is playing it) would be a young phil collins. as for the record itself, this is a strong evolution of squarepusher's sound to include a broader tonal pallette, while honing in well on what it is that he's always done. you couldn't ask for more from the guy at this stage in his career.
squarepusher stereotype 1994/
2025
uk+ire B+ i can't say i'd heard this before. squarepusher has developed a reputation as the brainiest of the 90s braindance artists, which is just a way to get around the embarrassing term idm, while nonetheless continuing to try to point out that this isn't ebm. the kids came up with this idea of edm which looks like a cross between the two and sort of is, but there was a time when people felt it was worthwhile to say "look, this is music. it's not just boom boom boom.", and it led to people calling it jazz as a way out, but to an extent you'd might as well just give up and call it progressive rock because it's so fucking british anyways, which nobody dares to do. what i'm getting at is that you hope an early squarepusher record is abstract, even if you expect it to be more rave and acid house than his later work, and that's actually more or less what this is. it's dated; it's from 1994, and you can tell. it's not helpful to analyze it as new music. but if you want some more very early squarepusher, well, here it is, and it's really everything you'd hope it is, too.
swans birthing 2025 us A+ i still remember when swans were dead. the last few swans releases have really taken gira to a different level and, after having listened to this a few times, i think his sanity is an open question. this record is bizarre. there are certain crutches in his contributors that he relies upon, and he has a tendency to exaggerate bad cliches, but, for what it is, this might be the best record released so far this century. the problem is that it's almost impossible to listen to, and that's before you try to understand it, which i don't suggest doing.
geese getting killed 2025 us E i didn't make it through this one. the singer's not my thing. seems really phony and plastic and fake. the first song would be better if it was a reaction to finding a bum (that is, a homeless person) in his car than a bomb in his car.
guerilla toss you're weird now 2025 us B+ guerilla toss wants you to think they're punk, and there was something punk about them in 2015ish, but this record draws from mainstream pop, nu metal and progressive rock, with little to no discernible punk influence. that's not a criticism, it's a description. i wouldn't normally listen to vocals of this type, and citing paramore nowadays would not be current, but it is the last thing i heard with this type of vocals, which is a good distance from the barking of yester year. it's still popular. i think. i dunno. the odd time signatures, prominent synth work and capable guitar narratives keep it flowing in a manner that seems intended for mtv, but they don't have mtv anymore. i'm not that old, i was a kid in the 90s, but i don't think this has that much in common with pavement or phish. rather, the very popular band (at it's peak) that this record reminds me of is late 70s or early 80s genesis, albeit not in exact style but in aesthetic and approach. these are relatively short, musically interesting, anthemic, arena-ready synth-rock pieces that would make phil and tony smile. that gives the record a pretty broad level of appeal. contemporary pop music of this sort is generally intentionally extremely facile, and while this isn't particularly complex either, it's developed enough to be interesting. at my age, i feel like i'm looking in on something, although i know i'm not; that said, if the intent here is to market a polished pop record to young people, and you know a few, maybe help these big kids out.
cardiacs lsd 2025 uk+ire B+ this is not really cardiacs. the key composer had been functionally dead for years before he died and it's clear enough that he didn't leave enough for a record, so some of his friends and proteges took over and the result is passable but not very impressive. they do the same pop song something like ten times. i initially described it as a parody and i think that's correct. i never thought i'd suggest they should cut a cardiacs record in half, but this multitide of identical pop songs is redundant and gets tiresome and if jim thought he was going to fool everybody, i think i'm on to him. his brother hated him for a reason; he's a sonofabitch. the lengthier and more disparate pieces hold their interest (it's ok if some of the instrumental interludes sound like they were written by somebody with mild brain damage, because it's true, and it adds to their quirky charm), but we only needed one of these interchangeable pop songs over an hour, and it's hard to imagine going back to the record when you realize it's the same song over and over again. maybe your average cardiacs fan in 2025 can't remember ten minutes ago, anyway.
i've been utterly exhausted for weeks and think it's more psychological than physical.

i don't want to waste any more time on this court fight, but i have no choice. i have documents to write and don'y want to.

i have shape around these investment decisions now, which is something else that i more have to do than want to do. i shouldn't bitch and complain about the free cash, really. planning for when you get older is something you have to do at some point, and the government is making it easier for me to catch up, which i should be appreciative of, even if i'd rather be pulling my fingernails out.

i made a conscious choice to avoid having children, which makes it that much more important to ensure i put some money aside for when i'm older, and i'm about to get on that. i want my life to be about me. i don't mind relying on state systems, but i despise relying on people. this fell into my lap without even thinking about it, but it's actually kind of ideal, for me.

so, what cheap stocks should i buy with the free money? send me an email.
no, i want to get as much in as fast as i can.

4500*1.1^5 - 4500 = 2747.295

that's the potential growth on the dropped 4500 if i only get $6000 instead of $10500 up front.

even if i put $3000 in, and get $9000, the loss is still:

1150*1.1^5-1150 = $700.

i might not be able to get the full $3500, but i should put as much in as i can and recalculate on jan 1st to ensure i'm hitting the max and not over contributing. that said, i'll also want to get in as much as i can, as fast as i can, to the max.

i'll call in the morning.

starting in early 2027, i will be switching to putting minimum $450/month in, until 2030. this will be roughly what they give me for the cohb and probably maximum potential contributions.
in fact, this account should open with $11000, not $10,000, and i'm going to be able to get $16000 out if the max $20000, not $15000. i should get $1000 for every year back to 2015 plus the $1000 for 2025 and, because it's the end of the year, i should get it all right away.

i'm pretty sure the carry forward doesn't run out after ten years but i'm going to cal to make sure.

nonetheless, if i only put $2000 in by the end the year, which would be $500 each for 2015-2018, and subsequently only received $6000 immediately, how would i recalculate?

the max for 2026 will then be 500 for 2019-2025 (7*500 is 3500 multiplied by 3 is $10500). 3500/12 ~300. that may be more attractive to me to start if i can't get a lump sum in from family.

the max for 2027 will be 500 for 2026 ($1500) plus 1000 for the first four years (2015-2018) (4000*2 = 8000) plus $500 more for 2019 ($1000), which is $5000. 500/12 ~ 420.

the max for 2028 will be 500 for 2027 ($1500) plus $500 for 2019 ($1000) plus $1000 for the next four years (2020-2023), which is again $5000 and again ~420/month.

the max for 2029 would be 500 for 2028 ($1500) + $1000 each for 2024-2027 ($8000) + $500 more for 2028 ($1000). same contributions.

the max for 2030 would be 500 for 2029 ($1500) + 500 for 2028 ($1000) + 1000 for 2029 ($2000) + 500 for 2030 ($1500) + 1000 for 2030 ($2000), which is an additional $3500 to get the last $8000. 3500/12 is ~300 again.

total grants wold remain $6000 + 4*10500 + 8000 = 56000.

that seems more attractive to me, i think, unless i can get a sum in immediately.
my immediate task is getting $3500 cash into the rdsp by the end of the calendar year. i have close to that in cash.

if i miss the target, i can recalculate the max amount for 2026, which will likely end up being a little less. it will rollover to the next year.

...although, i also want to make sure it all rolls over, and not just the last ten years. i assumed they'd take the first 7 years at $500, but i i lose the $1000 for 2015 then they won't do that. instead, i'd have to use the $1000 for 2015 right away and the new max would be:

$1500 for 2015 (500*3 + 1000*2 = $3500 in matching grants) + 2000 for 2016-2019 (2000*3 = $6000) + $333.34 for 2020 (333.343 = $1000), which is

1500+ 2000+ 333.34 = 3833.34

but if i just put the 3500 or the 3000 or the 2500 in, the rest will rollover, and i may just want to make sure i get the $1500 for 2015 in, and then start chipping away at it in january.

i will get a $1200 cdb transfer on dec 18th that i was always intending to move into the rdsp.
the bulk of it will go into aggressive mutual funds, to start. i've looked over this more closely, and it's by far the best choice. over time, i may divest and reinvest in ways i've identified as better than the mutual funds, but i don't expect i'll beat the funds without a learning curve, first.

i think it would be stupid to, for example, just buy $10000 of amazon stocks and cross my fingers, but the money may get slowly taken out of the mutual funds and directly reinvested in stocks, so that i may end up with something like that in the end.

...but i'm going to do the research and make some oddball buys, too, and hope it works out, and i will actually do that first, not last.
i mean, i need to be clear: i'd be highly unlikely to fund this account on my own initiative. i'm really not very interested in buying stocks or tending to investments; it's just not something i'm very interested in.

however, the government is giving me $70,000 in grants and putting it in an account that is singularly meant for this purpose. i can't do anything else with these funds; the money has to be invested.

so, i'd might as well make the best of it.
the truth is that my family owes me quite a bit of money.  i actually lent my father several thousand dollars in 2008 when the market crashed, and he seems to have lost it gambling, as he had an addiction to gambling. i've had an extremely hard time recovering those funds from his estate, because he doesn't appear to have told anybody, but rather told everybody that he gave me the money he lost gambling to pay my rent (he never paid my rent even once). there was an agreement that my stepmother would transfer me a small amount of money on a regular basis for a large amount of time, but she didn't transfer me a dime and when i moved out of ottawa i just walked away from it. as an odsp recipient, i had strict asset limits that have since broadened. at the time, it wasn't worth it. it has since become worth it, and i tried to go after a bit of the money they owed me when i realized i was going to have to move in 2023, and realized i was going to have to sue them for it, as they weren't intending to be honest about the money intended for me that was stolen.

i'm looking to transfer funds into this rdsp fairly aggressively; if i can move $3500 in before dec 31st and $4500 in in the first week of january, i will be eligible for $21000 in grants in addition to the $10000 it opens with. if i can get $30,000 into an aggressive mutual fund package before the spring, that could start to grow pretty fast, over $5000/yr, and i can continue to dump upwards of $15K of grants into it for the next five years. it could be at 50K in two years, and then i'm pulling in over $5000/yr fairly reliably. i can live on $10,000/yr, if i can get the housing situation dealt with independently.

i'm hoping i can talk them into transferring some funds into this account to take full advantage of the grants and in order to evade the imminent lawsuits that are coming, but they've become stubborn conservative idiots, and are leaving me with no choice but to sue them, which is something that shouldn't be necessary for me to do, and something i don't want to do.

i bought $10,000 worth of medium risk mutual funds on the strong suggestion of the advisor to open the account, and that's reasonable, but i'm going to want to diversify a little. as mentioned, if i'm aggressive about this, i could get $20,000 in grants within a few months. i might decide to buy more mutual fundsi n the end, but i may want to buy some stocks directly, as well and, over the long run, manage this myself. 

i have never purchased any stocks before, so i agree that buying mutual funds is the smartest thing to do immediately, but i could see the value in doing something like buying $500 of penny stocks in canadian mining companies set to ramp up production for critical minerals. i have time to do that research and i'm capable of doing it.

the fact that my father was bad with money and had a gambling problem is something i've tried to learn from. i don't gamble; i'm very financially conservative. however, i'm getting roughly $70,000 of free money from the canadian government in the next five years, put into an account meant to buy stocks and bonds with. i should figure out how to put the bulk of into stable investments, and make sure any contributions i make for myself are in the safest place possible, while taking some moderate risks with some of the free money, and some higher risks with a very small amount of it.

if i buy $500 of penny stocks out of the $70000 i get in grant money and $100 worth of those penny stocks get to $100 each, well, i'm an instant millionaire. that's worth it.

i've criticized carney's infrastructure plan as a ploy to manipulate the stock markets. i should take advantage of that, if i think i understand it.