i should point out that i realize that buffalo meat contains items like zinc which are used in testosterone production, but that doesn't matter because i don't have testicles and because i'm taking suppressors. i don't eat a lot of meat, but i have never been strictly vegan, and it's never caused my testosterone to spike before.

if i conclude the buffalo is the problem, i'm going to be looking for a side of crow (should i go get a possum, too?) but it doesn't make any sense to me and would be secondary. i mean, maybe the buffalo meat made the steroids in the hot sauce worse, and maybe if i were to isolate either of them it wouldn't have any real effect. i could make sense of that.

if they're getting these drugs illegally, they're apparently quite expensive.

if there's a way other than temperature to recover a solute, i don't know what it is.

hrmmn.

if they drugged the hot sauce, would they drug the vinegar? should i take a chance?

i have some vinegar, some cayenne pepper and some garlic salt.

i could try to make my own hot sauce.

the frank's is dark red and you wouldn't catch anything dropped in it. the vinegar is...vinegar. it's clear. i don't want to burn it. how else can i tell if they spiked it?

this morning was not a priapism or anything close to it. it was a return to the 10 second erection that faded immediately on waking up, but it's enough to make the point abundantly clear. i had cleared my system out enough that i woke up repeatedly with no effect yesterday morning and earlier this morning. something changed, and the only source is the food i ate. it's mild enough that it's incremental enough to make sense.

i have to make sure i'm keeping close track of what i'm eating.

i still have one pineapple left, some limes and oranges, some red, orange and yellow peppers and some broccoli to eat (the last food bank run gave me a lot of broccoli and a lot of bell peppers, which is great, as those are staples in my diet that i didn't get previously), so i'm not going to put the pasta down entirely, but i am going to remove the three items i think are suspect - the kfc chicken, the ground buffalo and the hot sauce - until i fully detox, and then bring them back in one by one, with the hot sauce last.

the pasta without the hot sauce is tolerable. the guac without the hot sauce is going to be an adjustment but ok. salsa and quinoa (lentils) without hot sauce seem almost impossible, given the recipes.

there are other items to eat up, like the poutine. i bought a fair amount of bacon the last time i was out. if i eat these other items first, and maybe get through some canned food, then i can put the hot sauce reliant items aside for a few days, until i buy fresh bottle at the store. i had portioned out hot sauce i bought in bulk into a half dozen containers and let it sit unpackaged when i went out, which i should not live in fear of doing. i had to let them do it and then catch them, because the police either aren't listening or are actually so corrupt and crooked that they're drugging me themselves.

while it's hard for me to make sense of how they could inject the steroids into the chicken or beef in a way that would bypass my liver, something that is more possible is that they might have dropped something into my pan, where it would be soluble. i had a pan with a little bit of salami grease and a little bit of olive oil. i left it on the stove, covered, without changing it when i went out, and was reusing it when i was cooking. if they dropped something in there and i then fried the buffalo up in it, i might have then consumed it, and it might have been the cause of the difference in experience. steroids are generally absorbed better in fatty meals. that doesn't really explain the totality of the last few days, though. only the hot sauce really correlates, but i'm not done testing yet.

i'm going to be keeping close track of this over the next few days as i sort this out.

tonight, i'm going to have my normal guac but with no hot sauce, with added yellow pepper and canned corn and with a monterrey jack tuna sandwich melt on the side. i'll post the recipe.

- june 16th: doubled up salsa with chick peas, cheese, spices and vitamins.

- june 17th: onion soup bacon poutine

- june 18th: basic doritos nachos and french onon soup with bacon

- june 19th: doubled up salsa reprise

- june 20th: caesar salad without subs

- june 21st: 2nd onion soup poutine with onion soup and last chance salad

- june 22rd: 3rd onion soup poutine with onion soup with beets

- june 23rd: caesar salad without subs

- june 24th: caesar salad without subs

- june 25th: bacon and eggs without subs, no salsa

- june 26th: bacon and eggs without subs, no salsa

- june 27th: ad hoc pad thai

- june 28th: broccoli soup

- june 29th: fridge-clearing meal (oranges & garlic bread)

- june 30th: kd + chick peas + fridge clearing exercise

- july 1st:    kd + chick peas + fridge clearing exercise

- july 2nd:  kd + chick peas + fridge clearing exercise

- july 3rd:  10 packages of instant oatmeal, in 5 installments. spaghetti-os + spices & vitamins (cumin, cayenne, pepper, oregano, paprika, sunflower seed, hemp seed, nutritional yeast, frank's).

- july 4th:  a can of stew and a can of corn, plus spices & vitamins.

- july 5th: a package of jasmine rice i had put aside as a quinoa sub (it probably isn't), with a can of peas and a can of tomato soup, plus spices and vitamins.

- july 6th: a can of beans cooked in a can of vegetable soup, plus spices and vitamins.

- july 7th:  two cans of chicken noodle soup, plus spices and vitamins. tim's xl double-double coffee in morning. two builders protein mini bars in evening. 7-11 coffee with jalapeno taquito late at night.

- july 8th: food bank junk food eat through - two bags of "real vegetable chips" (one big, one small), a bag of goldfish crackers, one mini crispy crunch, some strawberry licorice, prime energy drink, two tim horton's donuts, little ceasar's pepperoni pizza with unlabelled chocolate milk product.

- july 9th: another prime energy drink with another unlabelled chocolate milk product, unlabelled food bank ginger bread (two loaves)

- july 10th: pasta with minor subs (1), third energy drink, sour cream n cheddar chips

- july 11th: sour cream 'n' bacon, sour cream 'n' onion chips

- july 12th: more licorice, pasta with minor subs (2)

- july 13th: jalapeno cheddar chips, pasta with minor subs (3)

- july 14th: 10 baby cookies, pasta with minor subs (4)

- july 15th: i ate most of the 14th pasta on the 15th and followed it with the remaining baby cookies (which are actually french butter cookies, not baby cookies. they look like baby cookies). i did not make pasta for the 15th.

- july 16th:.  pasta with minor subs (5)

- july 17th:  pasta with minor subs (6)

- july 18th (on the 19th):  pasta with minor subs (7)

- july 19th (on the 20th): cereal (one bowl of vector and all bran with paprika, flax, nutritional yeast, hemp seeds and soy, as per my normal diet and one bowl of instant oatmeal with a little real milk and an apple)

- july 20th (on the 21st): pasta with minor subs (8)

- july 21st (on the 22nd): pasta with minor subs (9)

- july 22nd: cereal day 2 in cycle 2 (final cycle 2 cereal day): one bowl of vector and all bran with paprika, flax, nutritional yeast, hemp seeds and soy, as per my normal diet and one bowl of instant oatmeal with a little real milk and two apples, one in the oatmeal and one standalone.

- july 23rd: cereal day 1 in cycle 3

- july 24: pasta with minor subs (10)

- july 25: cereal day 2 in cycle 3, same as 22 and 23, with the addition of 6 mini apple sauce containers.

- july 26: pasta with minor subs (11)

- july 27th - guac with white rice and canned corn. two pieces of white bread with plum better.

- july 28th: pasta with minor subs (12)

- july 29th: guac with white rice and canned corn. two pieces of white toast with olive oil margarine, and then two pieces of white bread with plum butter after. four more pieces of white bread, with plum butter and strawberry jam. 

- july 30th: pasta with minor subs (13), including fried chicken for salami.

- july 31st: a larger piece of fried chicken alone. pasta with minor subs (14), including a mix of buffalo and chicken for salami. six pieces of white bread for peanut butter and strawberry jam.

- aug 1st: four pieces of white bread and the rest of the peanut butter. quinoa without subs (on aug 3rd).

- aug 2nd: four marshmallows, two bananas and a chocolate bar. quinoa without subs (on aug 3rd).

- aug 3rd: pasta with minor subs (14), including the buffalo/chicken mix for salami (on aug 4th). two pieces of toasted italian bread.

- aug 4th: bacon and eggs (no salsa) 

- aug 5th: pasta with minor subs (15), including the buffalo/chicken mix for salami. two pieces of toasted italian bread.

- aug 6th: guac with yellow pepper, homemade hot sauce and canned corn with a monterrey jack tuna melt.

- aug 7th: pasta with minor subs (16), no hot sauce and no salami sub. 

i don't want to live in the bronze age or the dark ages.

i want to live in the space age.

i can put together a plan.

- i need to detox the poisonous testosterone from my system, first. this substance is shit. people that take this voluntarily are retards. i don't want it in my system. i'd remove my kidneys and inject myself with red blood cells instead if i could. it's a complete garbage hormone with complete garbage effects.

- once that's done, i can take a blood test that will demonstrate what my blood chemistry looks like normally, in the absence of this bullshit i'm being drugged with.

- then i can buy a bottle of hot sauce at the store and make meals with it, locking myself inside until it's done.

- i can take another blood test after that

i have to find a way to test the hot sauce. it looks like they went overboard to overpower my blockers, and that means it should be easier to test and catch. 

i can't do anything until i detox and clean myself up. i can't go to a blood lab. i can't do laundry. i can't go to the police station. i can't look for apartments. i can't take the garbage out. i can do nothing but lock myself inside and wash myself until i'm clean and the disgusting filth they're enforcing on me in the name of their bronze age rules has washed off.

we need to wake up and fight back before it's too late.

canada is on the brink of entering a devastating muslim dark age that will dismantle and destroy the country, unless we stand up and stand together and rise up and fight back.

i'll have to make that choice in the next week or two.

the only food source that actually makes sense is the hot sauce. if the problem persists, i guess i was wrong and will need to look at the drugs being smoked downstairs or at the windows as sources.

.....almost.

if cutting the hot sauce out is effective in removing the testosterone, i may decide it makes more sense to stay here and sue them.

but i can't sit here and keep getting harassed. i need to find somewhere safe to stay.

it's hard to make sense of how they could put it in the meat.

i had pasta last night and the result was pretty brutal, pretty fast. i had to double up on the suppressors again this morning. twice.

i'll need to remove the hot sauce from my diet. the next set of tests will come after i've detoxed the testosterone from my system and am back to looking like my self again, to demonstrate what a normal blood test looks like.

i'm further deciding i'll have to move as soon as possible.

some of the greatest heroes of english and western culture include people like oscar wilde, alan turing, galileo, socrates and adam weishaupt who were targeted, harassed and in some cases killed by the religious and political authorities for daring to challenge the official views of the church and/or the state. i could stand on the shoulders of shorter giants.

the drugs are in my food. it's probably the hot sauce; it could potentially be the meat. the police appear to be involved, which means i might be being targeted by my own government.

this is canada, which is being taken over by radical islamism.

i've thought about this a bit and i'm deciding that what the world wants from israel in gaza - israel to rule it without annexing it - is impossible.

the world wants israel to feed gaza. it wants israel to police gaza. in return, israel doesn't collect tax revenue from gaza and has no legal jurisdiction over it. the world wants it both ways.

israel has been trying to explain that it has no real responsibility to feed gaza, and the aid chaos is a result of a lack of local policing. hamas itself, which should be in charge of police but has delegated it to islamic jihad, which does not enforce legislated laws but instead enforces religious codes, points to egypt as responsible for the blockade. the world doesn't want to listen.

this probably isn't israel's train of thought, but it remains true: if it is israel's responsibility to feed and police the region, it needs to be able to levy taxes, and it needs jurisdiction. that requires annexation.

palestinian statehood is absurd. the egyptians won't take the city back. it leaves israel with few other options.

the world can't have it both ways. either gaza is not israel's responsibility and the problem is egypt, or gaza is israel's responsibility and it needs jurisdiction to tax and police it.

no. this is stupid.

the europeans completely outsmarted trump, who agreed to sell off a half a trillion dollars of his manufacturing base to his frenemies across the pond. that was dumb.

you'll see how it plays out.

trump has three years left, max. i don't think he makes it that long.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2025/aug/06/eu-us-trade-deal-trump

for covid, specifically, most people should take whole virus vaccines.

a more stable virus like polio may be better targeted by mrna vaccines.

my understanding is that he's actually right.

mrna vaccine technology should be used to attack viruses that are more stable than the flu or covid, which will mutate at a high rate on a regular schedule. the problem is that it's too specific, so it loses efficacy faster than the oldest method, which i understand is still the best, which is just injecting dead virus.

if you use the whole virus, the vaccine may still stimulate antibodies based on other parts of the virus, even after it's mutated several times. if you use just the spike protein, it will stop working when the spike protein changes.

mrna vaccines may cause viruses to mutate in the specific way to evade the vaccines. that is less random than not using mrna vaccines. i wouldn't expect this is a big deal, though.

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c74dzdddvmjo

he did not have sexual relations with that underage woman.

has he said that yet? 

he's going to.

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c79l38vl3lwo