when i was a little kid, back in the mid 90s, i wrote a song called "circus". i remixed, rewrote, reapproached and rerecorded this track a few different ways, but it's the original demo i recorded in my basement studio in 1997 that has the vocal section that has tended to confuse a lot of people.

i've clarified this a few times but feel the need to do so again.

the song is a critique of media, and i don't know how anybody could not realize that this is obvious. it's built on a dropped-d riff-out of the byzantine circus theme, which like much of byzantine culture ended up lost to history everywhere except in russia. you'll know it when you hear it, but you might not know it as byzantine circus music, you might associate it more with dancing bears. the dropped d riff through digital distortion (played on an ibanez with an awful bridge locking mechanism) made sense in 1997.

i am not suggesting that i actually want to be like the menendez brothers or like the unabomber in the sense of wanting to copycat their crimes, i'm mocking the media coverage and it's tendency to turn criminals into media stars. it's a similar message to a movie released in the 90s called "natural born killers", with woody harrelson and juliette lewis, that is also a critique of the media and that a lot of stupid people didn't understand.

you can hear a lot of who i turned into as an adult, as written into this site, on this track that i recorded as a kid. my media critique is a little more sophisticated than it was then, but basically the same.

in 1997, my biggest lyrical influences came from punk rock singers like dexter holland, greg graffin and jello biafra. i was also massively influenced by college rock singers like michael stipe and bono that were punk rock musicians in disguise. as such, i want to insert the disclaimer from the 4th offspring record, as narrated by jello biafra, before i post the song.

please try hard to understand. it's a sarcastic media critique. it's not a sick fantasy.

now, here's the song: