- i was out much of the day on aug 2nd. i did not eat, except the items mentioned.
- i noticed the secondary effects of the drugging become overwhelming on the afternoon of aug 2nd. however, i was exhausted and slept and actually slept well due to doubling up on the blockers, and woke up late at night without a priapism.
- i made some quinoa around midnight when i woke up and ate it and made some more about 7:00 but went back to sleep before finishing it. i received my blood results when i woke up and wrote the previous document while i ate the first bowl of quinoa, early in the morning.
- turn a burner on the stove on to full blast. highest setting. crank it to 11.
- measure a third a cup of quinoa and place it into a fine strainer. i use the basket from a broken coffee machine for this purpose. let it run under water for at least five minutes, moving it around every little while. the reason you rinse the quinoa is to remove the saponins, which may block the digestion of key nutrients.
- while the stove is preheating and the quinoa is rinsing, chop the following items and put it all into a big, serving bowl:
- one red pepper (or around 150 grams)
- one carrot (or around 110 grams)
- one beet
- 50 grams of broccoli florets
- one avocado
- two cloves of garlic
- one orange
- one lime
- when that is done, take the quinoa out of the strainer and put it into a sturdy pot
- add a tad more than 2/3 cups of water
- add a fair amount of frank's hot sauce. if you want to add other items to season, do it, but i just stick with the hot sauce.
- stir.
- put pot on stove and wait until it comes to a boil.
- when it's boiling, cover the pot.
- walk to your microwave and set it to 15 minutes.
- walk back to the stove and reduce the heat. i had a newer stove in my previous apartment, and i would set it to min. on my very old stove (70s) in this apartment, i set it to 3.
- while it is cooking, add the following to the bowl:
- a few strands of fresh dill
- 1 tbsp of paprika
- 1 tbsp of oregano
- 1 tbsp of sunflower seeds
- 1 tbsp of cayenne
- 1 tbsp of cumin
- a bunch of pepper
- 1 tbsp of hemp seeds
- 1 tbsp of nutritional yeast
- 10 slices of medium cheddar cheese
- a lot of ceasar dressing
- a lot of frank's hot sauce
- while you're getting used to your stove, check on the quinoa periodically to make sure it hasn't boiled all the water off. it's done when the water boils off. don't overcook.
- if there is still water after fifteen minutes, you didn't cook it at high enough temperature. that's ok. stir and let sit until water burns off.
- when it's done, remove from burner and let sit, covered, for five minutes.
- dump, hot, into bowl.
i eat the quinoa with a tall glass of fortified, sugar-free soy milk.
- after doubling up on the suppressors and sleeping well on the evening of the 2nd, and after eating one and a half quinoa meals with a lot of franks on the morning of the 3rd, they woke me up at about 9:30 am on aug 3rd with another priapism.
- i spent all day in the shower
- i doubled up the suppressors again and then slept well in the evening. i woke up late on the 3rd.
- i made more pasta early on the 4th and had eaten most of it by 7:00 am. i did not sleep well, but it was because i was having several active bowel movements. as was the case previously, and has been the case for some time, the symptoms would recur and pass with defecating. i tried to sleep it off a little.
- i woke up in the evening and tried to figure this out. i found the article explaining that steroids are reabsorbed in the colon.
- i posted the following to my blog at 1:34 on aug 5th and it does contain some details but these are necessary and relevant:
--
- i finished eating around 20:00. it was the last bit of pasta and a couple of pieces of toasted italian bread. after eating the garlic cheese buns, i ate through the baguette and mostly ate the white bread with pb and jam and plum butter. i still have the loaf of italian bread, a loaf of whole wheat bread and a loaf of flax/quinoa bread i bought myself.
- i took a giant shit a few hours ago that cleared out the most recent pasta (it was after the giant quinoa shit). i just pushed out whatever was left as i was typing this.
- a few hours later, i doubled up on all of my hormones all at once - t-blockers, estrogen and progesterone. this is a lot of everything. my doctor would scream at me, but my liver and kidneys are testing ok, and i had to do this to test. this is intended to just overwhelm my system, and it might make me a little sick, but that's ok.
- i then masturbated, which i almost never do. it'd been about four months. ish. i don't like to masturbate because it's male performative. i won't get into the details, but i masturbate in a way that minimizes the male performative aspect as much as possible. it's actually fairly female performative. i cannot generally get erect at all, let alone maintain an erection, and masturbating is sort of weird for that reason. i have to kind of rub up against a mostly limp appendage. i don't usually ejaculate anything out when it's done and the fact that i did tonight is further proof that i've recently been drugged. anything i might do to negate this aside, the reality is that my anatomy is what it is and it's impossible to get around the male performative component, so i'd rather just avoid it altogether. when my testosterone is properly suppressed, i can and have gone months and months, perhaps years (i didn't keep track) without masturbation, but i have been drugged recently and i had to face the cold reality that, because i've been repeatedly drugged and haven't ejaculated in months, anything clogging up my system would be contributing to the problem, in terms of experiential effects. i did this to clear my system out. it should both make me feel better and help isolate sources, for testing. now that i'm completely cleared out, my body should have a difficult time generating anything further, unless i'm drugged again.
- now, i need to be clear about this. when they removed my testicles, they removed both my sperm cells and my vas deferens, so i'm physically incapable of generating or ejecting any kind of sperm at all. however, i do still have a prostate and i do still have various tubes and ducts like the seminal vesicle that create the non-sperm parts of semen, like the lubricating fluid. what came out would actually be mostly sugar, and a bit of protein. once again, when my testosterone is properly suppressed, my body does not produce this fluid, either. however, i've been repeatedly drugged, and there was some fluid in my ducts for that reason. it's more proof that i've been drugged. i expelled that from my body, and it should make a positive difference.
- if i don't get drugged again, it should take months for this fluid to build back up to any substantive level, if it even does at all. if it builds back up quickly, it's evidence that the source of testosterone i'm being drugged with is in the air or in my food.
- i'm going to avoid eating for a while and see what happens.
i'm essentially clearing myself out as much as i can, radically shocking my system with a massive female hormone bath and then seeing what happens. do symptoms cease, indicating i have successfully detoxed and they'll have to get in here to drug me again? or do they continue, indicating it's in my food, or that i'm breathing it in?
for tonight, i'm going to try to clean up and finally get my hair dyed. the massive flush of estrogen will have other, beneficial side effects, as well.
if i notice continued symptoms of forced drugging, i will get to the lab on tuesday or wednesday. otherwise, i'm going to need to wait until what i just shocked my system with comes down a little.
--
i had the following meals over the next couple of days, the bolded with hot sauce:
- aug 5th: bacon and eggs (no salsa) (for aug 4th)
- aug 6th: pasta with minor subs (15), including the buffalo/chicken mix for salami. two pieces of toasted italian bread. (for aug 5th)
- aug 7th: guac with yellow pepper, homemade hot sauce and canned corn. (for aug 6th)
- after shocking my system late on the 4th, i had bacon and eggs around 7:00 on the 5th and went to sleep in the morning.
- i slept most of the day.
- the stalkers woke me up several times, but did not succeed in generating any kind of unwanted aroused response.
- i did experience some strange effects and took some tums in the afternoon to block it. the calcium has frequently been effective in blocking unwanted effects.
- a bowel movement i had at 16:00 on the 5th seemed to clear out the remaining pasta and push out some of the bacon
- i was feeling stable and normal by the morning of the 6th. on some reflection and thought, i decided to have the pasta (with hot sauce and meat) right away, to test for a response.
- they woke me up at 10:00 am, but it was with a 10 second erection and not a priapism. this suggests dose was a factor. i doubled up on the hormones and went back to sleep and made an attempt to sleep it off by staying in bed until the afternoon. they woke me up again with a ten second erection and i doubled up on the hormones a second time around 14:00.
- i woke up around 16:00, still feeling somewhat agitated. i concluded it was because i hadn't passed the pasta yet, perhaps due to the tums taken the day previously.
- i deduced that this test proved that the drugs are in my food and that there are three possible sources: the hot sauce, the buffalo and the chicken. however, only the hot sauce makes any serious sense, as oral steroids are soluble in vinegar.
- i decided to take all three items out of my diet until i could get a clean blood test and posted the following to my blog at 21:16 on aug 6th:
--
i can put together a plan.
- i need to detox the poisonous testosterone from my system, first. this substance is shit. people that take this voluntarily are retards. i don't want it in my system. i'd remove my kidneys and inject myself with red blood cells instead if i could. it's a complete garbage hormone with complete garbage effects.
- once that's done, i can take a blood test that will demonstrate what my blood chemistry looks like normally, in the absence of this bullshit i'm being drugged with.
- then i can buy a bottle of hot sauce at the store and make meals with it, locking myself inside until it's done.
- i can take another blood test after that
i have to find a way to test the hot sauce. it looks like they went overboard to overpower my blockers, and that means it should be easier to test and catch.
--
- a little before midnight, i made some homemade hot sauce out of some white vinegar, some cayenne pepper and some garlic salt. i'll be eating that for the next few days, until i'm sure i've detoxed out the testosterone.
- after midnight on aug 7th, i had a bowl of guac with added creamed corn and yellow pepper and with the homemade hot sauce as a sub.
- while i was woken up several times on the morning of the 7th in various states of agitation, they did not succeed in arousing me. i concluded this was due to the pasta not passing as a result of the tums, but the dose from a single meal not being high enough to generate substantive effects.
- the pasta did pass in the afternoon, and the agitation passed instantly with it.
i will be eating the following meals over the next few days and expect it not to generate any level of arousal when i'm sleeping. if i am wrong, i will need to recalculate. as stated, i am not a doctor, i am somebody with a high level of education that the system identified as a gifted child and that is trying my best to solve a very hard problem and can only do the best i can.
i am strictly empirically driven. i will not allow theory to skew or distort experimental results. i will follow where ever the evidence leads me, as best and as clearly as i can follow it, to where ever it leads me to.
- aug 7th: monterrey jack tuna melt with homemade hot sauce. (on aug 8th)
- aug 8th: pasta with minor subs (16), homemade hot sauce and no salami sub. (on aug 9th)
