Wednesday, June 23, 2021

i'm obviously opposed to voter suppression laws, and i've actually written a lot about that here. but, this is something that leftists may want to be a little bit subtle about.

why are the democrats fighting these bills? is it because they care about the rights of minorities to express themselves in demographically changing areas across the south? or is it because it's in the self-interest of the democratic party to do so? it's obviously the latter, as nothing ever changes for the better for these demographics when the democrats win (just like nothing changes for the better for rural white blue collar workers when the republicans win).

now, let's suppose that the democrats succeed in ramming through their act. while the democrats may win some elections, nothing ultimately changes much besides the right for blacks to affirm the status quo by voting for right-wing democrats.

but, if the democrats fail to ram through their act, and the demographics continue to change, then the ingredients for a more substantive movement are in place, as the system will have denied representation to the region's growing majority. it's when you have that disconnect between popular will and actual governance, and no way to work through the system to change it (however ineffective that is) that you see more substantive movements develop outside of the system, which is what the left needs and wants.

so, i mean, sure - voting suppression is undemocratic. i oppose it. these laws should be passed.

but, it may be in our own self-interest to allow the laws to pass, to try to build a movement that can circumvent the status quo democrats, and try to more effectively radicalize people on the ground.

and, this is the kind of thing i mean when i suggest that the republicans are increasingly the lesser evil - as the democrats just become a party of stasis and status quo elitism that turns people's brains off and sends them back to work, putting republicans in place may actually be more helpful, to generate a reaction.

they have to be traditional republicans, though. the reason a trump fails in that equation is because he's not a conservative, and is going to lead to conservatives joining the opposition - and watering it down. we don't want to join forces with conservatives, we want to demonize them and generate a backlash against them, because the policies we need to organize around need to actually be leftist in character in order to actually be worth pursuing. if your big tent movement ends up about restoring dignity to government or some other conservative bullshit tropes, which is inevitable under a big tent, then you've lost before you start.

but,in a place like arizona or georgia where the sitting governors are not these post-ideological nihilists that generate substantive opposition from the right but good ideologocal conservatives that can rally the base and are just getting outnumbered, it's really more helpful to keep them in place to react against - as the movement won't pull in disgruntled conservatives, because conservatives have no reason to be disgruntled.

it doesn't seem like biden has the votes for this, and the kneejerk against it appears to be ramming itself through. that's an opportunity to take advantage of to rebuild a left outside of the democratic party, and beyond the big tentism that has sacrificed leftism to pragmatism and status quoism.
so, i've got two fixed mixes from the art show demo ep up on the isomorphism ep. these mixes were normalized when burned in 2004, and i'm going to leave them that way. but, these are the original mixes:

1) file actually from 2003 (nulls with art show demo rips, after volume adjustment):

2) this was built yesterday morning from 2003/04 source to null with volume-adjusted cd rips, except for clipping in the initial track (from the normalization):

that will probably be inri084, but i'll be sorting through that over the next few days.
i got some more tests done today, so let's update.

================

my next set of requested tests will be to do with low stomach acid and so far includes:

- aluminum 

i also need to check for bone resorption markers, on top of the bone formation markers:
- hydroxyproline urine, total + free (covered)
- c-terminal telopeptide (not covered)
-  deoxypyridinoline - urine  (dynacare only) (not covered)
+
- oxalate urine (covered), if i'm doing urine

there's apparently a long list of these, neither corporate lab seems to cover many of them and they're all of questionable value. let me just do the one, plus osteocalcin, for now. but ask if he has good ideas about that...

instead of igf-1, which is not covered, i could check for gh first. so,
-growth hormone <----formation marker, pre-cursor to igf-1 and potentially a fix

let's check for lyme disease, and ask about other parasites like giardia.

and, let's check this again (monthly standing):
- vitamin d
- calcium +  albumin
- magnesium
- phosphorus
- alp
- b12
- ferritin +  iron + iron sat + tibc
- estradiol + progesterone + estrone
- cholesterol + cbc +  gastrin + reticulocyte
- pth + tsh + calcitonin + gh + cortisol + insulin

i'll take those out of the list as they become less of a concern.

for the gastro:
i'm still concerned about diverticulitis, but if the likelihood of tumours is minimal due to the cea test, i should ask for a virtual scope instead. that way, we can figure out if i need antibiotics or surgery without risking a tear, or agitating it further. ask about gardia fecal testing. also ask about low stomach acid (gastrin) & salicylates.

for the endo:
i need to do some more research on pth, as well, and what the following combo suggests:

- calcium, 9.6 (highish but normal)
- vitamin d, 35 ng/ml (lowish but normal)
- pth, 55 pmol/l (highish but normal)
- calcitonin, ?
- gh, ?

i can grasp by looking at the numbers that highish pth with lowish vitamin d makes sense, but it's not clear to me if that's clinically relevant, perfectly healthy or even just a random coincidence. and i think i need to wait for calcitonin to draw conclusions.

- i need to do research on how sporadic sleeping schedules might affect cortisol and if it might affect bone density.

- up estrogen intake to estrogen injections and estrace pills, until the testicles are taken out. do another bmd scan and try the formation medication after that?

=====

these tests are pending at lifelabs:
- asca   <---crohn's
- amino acid fractionation <-----this can provide a lot of info
- gastrin (on fast) <----- low stomach acid while fasting?
- osteocalcin <----bone turnover markers
- calcitonin <--------thyroid still

this test is pending from dynacare:
- fit test #2  <----colon cancer

these tests can be done next time i go to dynacare <----not right away
- celiac ($90) <-----maybe. last thing to check....
- igf-1 ($70)  <-----formation marker. wait for other markers, first. mostly of use if i try formation medication or as a metric for fracture risk and as a reaction to gh results.
- b-alp <----- formation marker. take with others.
- glutathione?
- pyruvate?

not yet ordered:
- psa: ($35 at lifelabs ) <---cea result makes this pointless right now.

this test is covered by ohip but is not offered anywhere in the region:
- serum oxalate <----iron blocker
- pyruvate <----manganese

this test is only available in a california lab:
-hepcidin <----hormone that regulates iron absorption

these absorption tests were skipped, for now:
- vitamin e
- vitamin k   <----inr, ptt fine
- selenium
- molybdenum
- manganese
- iodine  <----?
- copper serum <----ceruloplasmin fine

and, here's my list for absorption regarding my diet:

a - absorbing at high levels
b1 - next time
b2 - next time
b3 - next time
b5 - next time
b6 - next time
b7 - next time
b9 - absorbing at high levels
b12 - absorbing, and increasing stores
c - absorbing, at saturated levels
d - absorbing, but a tad low. i should check again soon.
e - pending  (paid)
cholesterol - perfect
k1 - pending (paid)  <----but ptt, inr, fibrinogen normal
fluoride?
aluminum?
sodium - absorbing & regulating
potassium - absorbing & regulating
magnesium - absorbing & regulating
phosphorus - absorbing & regulating
chlorine - absorbing & regulating
calcium - absorbing & regulating
chromium - next time
manganese - pending (paid) <----but,  pyruvate kinase is coming immediately
iron - not absorbing in food, but absorbing in pills
nickel - next time
copper - absorbing & regulating
zinc - absorbing & regulating
selenium - pending (paid) <----- need to find access to glutathione test, not priority right now
molybdenum - not available <---but pancreatic function is normal
iodine - pending (paid) <-----note that tsh is lowish. checking pth. no sign of goiter. dietary sodium is low...
mercury - low
lead - low
if you want a simplistic argument, the fact is that the chinese were actually there first - and the turks moved in after, from the north.
the people indigenous to the tarim basin are called "tokharian" in the western sources (which are recent, exclusively - neither greeks, nor romans, nor venetians had any contact with these people) and "yeuzhi" in the ancient chinese sources. they were white buddhists that spoke a unique branch of indo-european, but utilized sanskrit as a liturgical language. so, they were culturally most similar to the iranian and indian cultures to their south.

the second people to enter the region were the han chinese, who conquered it during roman times in order to control the trade routes in the region. while the chinese did not always have direct control over the region after the initial invasion (during roman times), the indigenous tokharians almost always accepted the chinese as legitimate overlords, and saw themselves as satellites of chinese civilization. it is actually from this region that buddhism spread to china.

it is not until many centuries later that the turks came in and displaced both the han chinese (who had administrative colonies in the region) and the indigenous tokharians, who continually aligned with the chinese emperors to try to resist turkification.

the region consequently became turkish first and then muslim second through a process of colonial replacement, cultural imperialism and violent coercion.

now, you can argue that that was a long time ago and it doesn't matter anymore, but why is that a different argument when applied in the tarim basin than it is when applied to british columbia?

regardless, my request is just to get the fucking history right - and stop sounding like an ignoramus when you're talking about this. the idea that the uighurs are indigenous to the tarim basin is not just wrong, but offensive in it's absolute ignorance of the history of the region. it's like suggesting that the spanish are indigenous to mexico, or arabs are indigenous to malaysia. stop doing it...
i don't really like either, but i'll side with buddhists over muslims roughly 100% of the time.

sorry.
ok.

can you please stop referring to the uighurs as indigenous people? it's simply a false statement - historically, ethnically, geographically, culturally. it's just wrong.

we went through this with the turks in the caucausus region as well, who are nowhere close to indigenous to the region.

in both cases, we're dealing with invading tribes that entered the region in the middle ages. it's not even ancient history. the displacement is recent.

these are the people that are indigenous to the region, and they no longer exist because the turks killed them all before they moved in:

turkish-speaking people occupy a rather large part of central asia, today. they are indigenous to almost none of it.

Tuesday, June 22, 2021

when justin trudeau claims that "parliament is dysfunctional", what he really means to say is that he doesn't feel like he's accountable to it.

he is our dauphin, after all.

and he thnks he's the king - which is a delusion we're going to have to strip him of fairly soon.
so, what having a rebuilt version of the isomorphism from late 2003 means is that i can salvage a demo version for the single when it comes up. it's the same version as on the art show demo, but it's not normalized (which makes combining the three tracks i cut it into back into a single track very difficult).

mid 2004 was my first re-release phase, so i've now come to the first point in the discography where i started to look backwards and consolidate. while i didn't realize it then, i had made it through the second period of my discography and was starting the third period in earnest. to an extent, i was processing the process that sent me across the country on an absurd trip with no purpose; in that sense, period 3 doesn't really start until june of 2004, but it leaves that year (may of 2003 to may of 2004) as a lost space, where i was both finishing period 2 and starting period 3. the ftaa material that closes in june, 2004 is really period 2; the trivial group material started in late 2002 is really period 3. so, this was a transition period...

the re-releases will appear in the grid as stubs, and i'll try to be as comprehensive as i can be. i'm also going to want to put together some kind of compilation that collects the edits i created in that first moment of looking back, as there are enough for an ep, at least.

further, there were a number of mix cds created at this time that i tried to pass around in novel ways, such as exchanging for cigarettes (i got you to take my cd, didn't i?). i'm shooting darts in the dark with this stuff, and i've known it for years. they could have releases, as well.

but, the next serious release will be the isomorpshism single as inri084ish, so lining this up (which is what i did tonight) will set me up for any potential remixes that are coming.
so, i'm finally lining up the core part of the isomorphism in cubase tonight, from source files initially pasted together in cool edit.

this will release in mid 2004 and is essentially done, i just need to file it first.
so, here's my shortlist on period 3.1, which i'm currently filing for the night:

inri075: re-record list of acoustic demos that is tbd

inri076: audiomulch noise collage

inri077: finish demo version of lost symphony left stranded on tape (not final version)

inri078: all versions of lost symphony, including a new 2021 version to be started imminently

=========================

inti079: no further edits. done.

inri080: no further edits. done.

inri081: no further edits. done.
i really wish i could just stop sleeping.

i'm behind on everything because of it.

Monday, June 21, 2021

so, after months of persistent hydroxyapatite treatment, that one split tooth does seem to finally be reconnecting to itself, although all that shit that the dentist put in there seems to be getting in the way. and, unfortunately, it might recombine right over the coffee stain. we'll have to see if that works itself out, eventually.

and, the one that seemed like it was clearing up is not almost entirely free of stain and apparently rebuilding.

my tentative conclusion is that this does seem to work, but it's overwhelmingly slow and requires great patience.

again: the tactic is to find  source of hydroxyapatite (i'm using crushed cow bones) and use it as a daily topical. i've posted numerous peer reviewed articles that your body will absorb it intact, but it was kind of a hail mary to hope it would actually rebuild a periodontal pocket, which is what i have from some fairly bad recession that was probably worst about 10 years ago and that i'm trying to avoid merely painting back over.

i'm holding off on the gums until i figure out the iron issue, and the bone issue is probably related as a root cause.
mercury was minuscule.

that's good to know.
the early quantum physicists were actually all buddhists, a largely unknown and overlooked fact that really explains how we got to where we are with this. and, that was something that was kind of common amongst educated germans at the time, which tied into the (debunked) aryan master race hypothesis.

colitis antibodies were undetectable.

this is a crude metric and doesn't mean i don't have colitis. however, combined with the cea test, it would indicate that i'm not dealing with any sort of invasive cells or unwanted growths.
and, then, after i win the case, i'll get vaccinated.
you may not understand, but your kids will thank me for it.
the principle that governments do not have the authority to make decisions regarding an individual's bodily autonomy is a legal reality worth standing for, and i'm not about to let it fall to the wayside in a fit of hysteria about catching a cold.
i will not get vaccinated, out of spite, because you're trying to force me to.

i will travel to countries that will allow me to.

i will stand up for my rights through legal challenges when i return home.

and, i will win and have these fascist rules overturned.

do you understand?
to recall.

publishing inri081

this is a big deal - the 7th record is now released.

and, i'm up to mid 2004 in terms of the rebuild structure.

i need to spend the night filing.

==========

when it was released in the summer of 2004, this would have been my fifth official recording, after inri, inriched, inridiculous and deny everything. sarah and i moved into a place for the beginning of may; she was working overnight (22:00-6:00) in a diner, so it gave me time to read and record. things seemed like they were starting anew, so i took the time to sort through the discography and reassemble what i actually had. 

a decision was quickly made to unpublish the first three records in favour of a zappa/keneally-style disc of cut-up guitar shorts that i called inricycled, and start seriously at deny everything. the written music that now exists in this space only existed in the form of completed scores, during this period. so, the only other things i had were the rabit is wolf demo, the recently completed reflections ep, some classical guitar stuff and a bunch of these noise demos. this was consequently the extent of the truncated discography, in mid-2004: inricycled (as it was then), deny everything (as it existed then), the rabit is wolf demo, reflections and a 5-track version of this ftaa disc. 

now that i have republished the three inri demos as instrumental recordings, stripped the deny everything lp of samples and converted the rabit is wolf material into two instrumental discs, taking this project to it's final conclusion becomes the process of removing samples from the 2004 demo, and converting it into my 7th completed original lp. 

the ftaa project was supposed to be a combination of political poetry and sample art projects that presented a vaguely "anarchist" political messaging. my concept of anarchism in 2004 was mostly economic, and mostly about presenting an alter-globalization alternative to the rising tide of "free trade" blocs that focused more on local worker control than on the outsourcing of cheap labour to countries with poor labour standards, which is what this term "globalization" actually means, in an economic sense. so, it was supposed to be about syndicalism, and it was supposed to be a *very* noisy and very abstract project. 

but, then 9/11 happened at about the same time as i was starting with this and the entire anti-nafta left just evaporated, as the war took over the popular movements and the more socially conservative aspects of the union movement dissented against the backlash and started looking elsewhere. we seem to forget that the real origins of the shift to the right amongst unionized workers is really cultural, and comes from a disconnect that developed in the anti-war left after 2001; a very large number of workers felt the country had been attacked, and wanted to respond with force. 

i kind of came in somewhere between. i was certainly opposed to the war, and for the right reasons, but i also felt that globalization was a bigger problem and deserved more attention. i think a lot of organizers on the left kind of got tricked by the size of the anti-war protests, into thinking there was more of a path in opposing the war. and people just kind of forgot about the trade issues. and, i also felt that the civil rights breaches that the government was ramming through were bigger issues than either the war or the trade protests. 

so, the record kind of shifted along with the realities around it's construction into something that retained a broadly anarchist ideology but was really more about reacting to the onset of fascism in the united states. so, the initial 5-track release included a track with a poem about the war in afghanistan, a sample collage about the incoherence of using more trade to undo the problems created by trade, a sample collage decrying rights lost in the 9/11 attacks, an instrumental noise collage raided from the then unreleased (and expected to remain unreleased) curious george suite and this sprawling 25-minute exploration of the collapse of liberal democracy into statist authoritarianism and cultural fascism. 

but, as with the other recordings, the samples have been removed to leave an almost entirely instrumental recording. i have retained the poem in the first track because the track is much stronger with it, which is an unusual decision for me. 

however, the initial intent of the record is salvaged on inri067, spoke: 
jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/spoke 

now, if you want to hear the record exactly as it was initially released in 2004, you'll need to take a look at the aleph disc, as you would need to do in order to hear the initial pressings of my other early recordings, as well. this is intentional as i believe the record is stronger in it's current incarnation and want to present it that way as final. 

i have added instrumental versions of atom's and taught to twist the affected so low as bonus tracks to the lp in order to make it comprehensive. that is, the lp now has the strongest versions of all of the ftaa material. 

these tracks were written and recorded from 2000-2004, mostly as throwaway experiments over the course of an afternoon. the counter-example is the seventh symphony, trepanation nation, which was reconstructed repeatedly over the years 2001-2014. this record was initially constructed in this form (minus the last two tracks) in june, 2004. reconstructed and resequenced in theory (but not in fact) at the end of sept, 2019 from parts that were rebuilt over 2014, but not actually reconstructed, resequenced and uploaded until june of 2021. finally re-released on june 20, 2021. audio permanently closed on . finalized as lp025 on . this is my seventh official record; as always, please use headphones. 

released june 1, 2004 

j - electric & acoustic & classical guitars, effects, bass, synthesizers, vocals, electric mandolin, live drums, drum sample manipulation, drum programming, piano programming, noise generators, granular synthesis, ring modulators, sequencers, sampling, sound design, digital wave editing, composition, production 

greg - drum performance sample source on track 5 
sean - ring modulator on track 5

yeah, i must have saved the source file for this as an mp3 and decompressed it.

for this particular track, it's so noisy that the artefacts are almost a positive addition.

Sunday, June 20, 2021

yeah, that creative software acts like spyware. you can't get it off the machine. that wasn't a problem before because the drivers for the older card (which didn't support asio at all) were integrated into xp. so, i'm just reinstalling immediately.

all i need to do is line up the sample in harry to take it out and the 7th lp releases. finally.

and, then i need to finish sorting through the drive.
...and i had two copies of my h2o driver....oops....
i had to take a nap...

i needed to get two phase inversions done this afternoon. one was easy and the second doesn't want to line up, but the creative card wasn't syncing right with cubase. so, let's try again with it removed from the machine.
so, the recording machine has been a bit more stable recently, until i did two things:

1) opened cubase
2) searched the 2 tb drive

i just proved that the audigy does not work properly over asio, so it's of minimal use to me, anyways. it's coming out. immediately.

i suspect that xp may have problems with drives larger than 1 tb, which i'm going to try to deal with by breaking the 2 tb drive up into smaller partitions.
i don't like sleeping...

i wanted this build of my 7th record done last night, but it's just a few more bits.
so, if you want the instrumental version of the renaissance piece that starts like divine amoebas, it is on the single. 

but, unlike everything else in my discography except stress, this is a vocally driven conceptual work and not a piece of pure music and i need to leave it that way.
broadly speaking, i've removed vocals from these records because i'm not comfortable with them. i rebuilt most of the inri-era vocal tracks for a series of singles, but they are broadly hard to listen to, so leaving them on the singles is the right way to do it. deny everything only had one vocal track to remove, and that was the right choice, partly because i had the electric folk version, which appears on the 5th record as the only salvaged vocal piece for the official lps. the 5th and 6th records were both built in 2014 for the first time, without vocals. and, the trivial group 2xlp will have vocals removed because they're mostly cringey, too - but left on the singles. 

unlike the others, i can't argue that that the vocals for like divine amoebas are cringey or hard to listen to. they don't interfere with the music, which was built around it. rather, i'd be separating the sound from it's content in a way that ultimately doesn't make sense.

so, i'll uploaded the 2021 rebuild for it. that's the right answer.

and, i'm going to replace some files on the amoebas single so they flow a little better, then, too.
a part of me is resisting the idea of removing the vocal mix from the ftaa disc.

let me chew on it  a bit, first.

publishing inri080

so, inri080 is done up to finalizing...

====

as mentioned below this, inri080 is now released - and this one's done to start. 

i needed a way to release an updated, corrected version of this tune, as i'll be removing the vocals from the 7th lp, which is set to release imminently. the version on the art show demo is normalized, but i'm leaving it like that. so, this fills a gap that opened up. 

the first part of the track (quantum psychosis) was written on heather's acoustic guitar in sarah's bedroom one night when i was there by myself and recorded directly to four-track tascam at the same time. several electric guitar overdubs were added either right away or very shortly. i digitized this in 2004 and do not know where the tape went; it is presumed lost, in 2021. 

the second part of the track was constructed more or less all at once in january, 2004 for the purposes of creating an art show demo. i had just finished reading a couple of books on afghan history, and had imagined this idea already, so i just implemented it all in one go. i haven't altered the recording substantively, since. 

the demo doesn't appear to have found an audience in it's initial presentation. 

the track itself is fairly esoteric. if you're not following the lyrics, it's a narrative of the history of afghanistan, starting from the achaemenid period and ending in the nato occupation of afghanistan. afghanistan used to be a very wealthy and very buddhist place, but it was utterly destroyed by the mongols in the 13th century and never fully recovered from the devastation. the track then climaxes in an epic 14-minute romp that sonically depicts the transmigration of the soul. afghanistan has historically usually been a buddhist region; it is unfortunately currently being occupied by foreigners that are non-buddhists, but their ancestors would no doubt forgive them for it.

this is a comprehensive collection of the different versions, as of mid-2021 and i don't expect to expand it further. 

written and recorded from 2001-2004. all versions here constructed over early 2004 from sound written in 2001 (the piano part) and/or recorded in late 2003 (the vocal quantum psychosis folk section) or early 2004 (the transmigration section). compiled and uploaded on june 19, 2021. as always, please use headphones. 

released february 1, 2004 

j - electric & acoustic guitars, effects, drum programming, vocals, noise generators, piano programming, noise generators, digital wave editing, composition, production 

special thanks to heather's guitar, which was just sitting in the corner minding it's own business before i picked it up to jam a bit.

if we're going to have identity politics, let's identify as atheists and unite on those terms and force the system to conform to what we want, rather than the other way around.
listen.

atheists are clearly the dominant demographic right now, but we're apathetic by nature and tend not to really care much about religion one way or the other. most of us don't even see at as worth being afraid of - it's too irrelevant to even fear.

i'm not representative of anybody; i'm always twenty years ahead of everybody, and what i'm trying to do is wake atheists up a little and get them to realize the threat that's in front of them - and know they won't unless pushed. and, that's probably the actual truth, that you're going to have to really push people hard to get them to react, and even the pandemic restrictions have only created a muted reaction because they really aren't enough to have people feel as though their rights are being taken from them, yet.

if you just take it on face value, if you eliminate the obvious symbolism that is going right over your average atheist's head, then wearing a mask is a triviality, right? i mean, who cares - it's just a stupid mask. what's the big deal?

it's when you take it to the next step that you're going to get people going "heeyyyyyy. wait a minute. you said i had to wear a mask to protect from diseases, but now you want me to lie on my face and mumble this nonsense facing...which way? why that way? this is lame. and weird. so, fuck off."

the premise of incrementally converting people relies on the assumption that they understand what's going on and will submit to it; if they don't even understand what the fuck is happening, you're just going to get a delayed reaction.

so, every time i go to google news it's something else. now, the who wants to ban alcohol. right. well, that's the kind of thing that'll get people out of their seats.

it could be a good thing in the long run if it wakes us up and convince us to be more politically aware. a cohesive atheist voting bloc might seem like a pipe dream, but it just might save the world if it's coerced into existence by the "liberals" organizing on the religious right.

Saturday, June 19, 2021

while this may classify as a terrorist attack, it's important not to try to utilize it as a means to bring in even more authoritarian laws.

the fact is that you can't predict these kinds of things, and you need to get at root causes - which means finding ways to get rid of religion - if you want these kinds of attacks to stop.

so long as you have religion, you will have violence against queer groups, and queer groups need to grasp that and take the initiative in protecting themselves.

and, no, i don't want to see greater integration between british and muslim legal traditions - i want to see the populations in the middle east rise up, overthrow their governments and throw muslim jurisprudence in the dungheap of history.

this is a parasitic system of law without any redeeming value at all, and which must be resisted from corrupting the system we have in place.

like i needed another reason to not vote for them, right?

i miss dalton mcguinty.
so, keep your religion to yourself - i won't be governed by it.
so, i mean, as long as he exists strictly within canadian-british jurisprudence, i don't give a fuck what he looks like.

but, we've got a constitutional crisis - and potentially more than that - on our hands if he ever decides to cite his religious scripture to get around the common law. 

i'll state this up front: that would be unacceptable, and would necessitate his immediate resignation.
the british system of law is superior, and your irrelevant muslim laws can fuck off.

stare decisis or bust.

so, you can cite your stupid book all you want, but i will pay you no heed, at all.
there is no place for islamic law in canada - and trying to enforce it is the exact point that i revolt.
this isn't surprising - trudeau appears to be a closet muslim, and this appears to be the sect he's in.

i'll be keeping an eye on the possibility that he may start to cite the koran in place of common law - which would be unacceptable, and which would undermine the legitimacy of the court.

it's a substantive threat to the rule of law to put muslim scholars on the supreme court, but we know this government doesn't care about that.

so, that means inri079 is now properly filed on my archive drive and i need to build inri80 after...breakfast. 
so, i can't create a comparable instrumental version of "like divine amoebas" because the track would lose it's purpose. it's two tracks pasted together - an acoustic guitar tape experiment & a weird piano + drum machine freakout that's meant to represent two souls dividing from each other as one dies (like amoebas).

if i just phase reverse the vocals out, there'll be this awkward gap in the track - which was really constructed around the vocals. rather, i'd have to fade the tape experiment down or something, but then why not just put  the whole thing in there? the dramatic "amoebas" loses itself...

and, then, if i'm going to do that, i need the amoebas single after all with the following:

- the full vocal mix in the best way possible (the version on the art show demo is a little bit corrupted)
- the instrumental mix for the ftaa (with the full tape experiment)
- the version on the art show demo, which was normalized in the burn (and left that way in the upload)

i'm also going to include a base mix that i have, which is unfinished but interesting, and a cut version of the symphony of psilocybin induced madness, which utilizes the same piano part.

so, that's inri080, which i'm going to date to feb 1, 2014; the ftaa demo is next, and will be dated to inri081. i need to stop to eat...
"you're not really my friend, america. go away." - justin trudeau
what it's really about is trudeau's bruised ego.

he was the only idiot in the whole world that took globalization and free trade seriously (his father may have put nafta in motion, but he saw the disaster coming once mulroney took control of it). he seems to have honestly believed in the idea that "free trade" would make everybody stronger. and, then the pandemic hits and canada has no vaccine capabilities, and nobody willing to sell it to him...

he's taking what was a predictable systemic failure point that every analyst saw coming decades ago as a personal insult, and turning inwards.

he's pouting.

so, now we have to hate americans because trudeau's feelings are hurt because nobody wanted to sell him vaccines.

and, we're not even taking steps to increase the domestic production capabilities.

we need to get this child out of power. but, until then, i'd join the chorus calling for the americans to open unilaterally.
see, this is the stupid narrative they want - that tough-guy trudeau is standing up to the bully americans and their oppressive open-border, free-movement policies. fuck them and their human rights.

it's absurd.

but, these are absurd people. and, this seems to be what they want - canadian nationalism, blatant xenophobia and rampant anti-americanism. in their mind, casting the yankees out as enemies makes them stronger, electorally.

it's trumpism, through a canadian filter. this is what trudeau has become...

i have to also point out that my lowish vitamin d was taken in march in canada, in the middle of a pandemic.

i hadn't been getting a lot of sun for several months at the time - let's check it in july.
i've updated this enough that i'm reposting it.

my next set of requested tests will be to do with low stomach acid and so far includes:

- aluminum 

i also need to check for bone resorption markers, on top of the bone formation markers:
- hydroxyproline urine, total + free (covered)
- c-terminal telopeptide (not covered)
-  deoxypyridinoline - urine  (dynacare only) (not covered)
+
- oxalate urine (covered), if i'm doing urine

there's apparently a long list of these, neither corporate lab seems to cover many of them and they're all of questionable value. let me just do the one, plus osteocalcin, for now. but ask if he has good ideas about that...

instead of igf-1, which is not covered, i could check for gh first. so,
-growth hormone <----formation marker, pre-cursor to igf-1 and potentially a fix

let's check for lyme disease, and ask about other parasites like giardia.

and, let's check this again (monthly standing):
- vitamin d
- calcium +  albumin
- magnesium
- phosphorus
- alp
- b12
- ferritin +  iron + iron sat + tibc
- estradiol + progesterone + estrone
- cholesterol + cbc +  gastrin + reticulocyte
- pth + tsh + calcitonin + gh + cortisol + insulin

i'll take those out of the list as they become less of a concern.

for the gastro:
i'm still concerned about diverticulitis, but if the likelihood of tumours is minimal due to the cea test, i should ask for a virtual scope instead. that way, we can figure out if i need antibiotics or surgery without risking a tear, or agitating it further. ask about gardia fecal testing. also ask about low stomach acid (gastrin) & salicylates.

for the endo:
i need to do some more research on pth, as well, and what the following combo suggests:

- calcium, 9.6 (highish but normal)
- vitamin d, 35 ng/ml (lowish but normal)
- pth, 55 pmol/l (highish but normal)
- calcitonin, ?
- gh, ?

i can grasp by looking at the numbers that highish pth with lowish vitamin d makes sense, but it's not clear to me if that's clinically relevant, perfectly healthy or even just a random coincidence. and i think i need to wait for calcitonin to draw conclusions.

- i need to do research on how sporadic sleeping schedules might affect cortisol and if it might affect bone density.

- up estrogen intake to estrogen injections and estrace pills, until the testicles are taken out. do another bmd scan and try the formation medication after that?

=====

these tests are pending at lifelabs:
- asca   <---crohn's
- mercury <---iron blocker
- p-anca/c-anca  <----colitis

this test is pending from dynacare:
- fit test #2  <----colon cancer

this test requires a 12 hour fast:
- amino acid fractionation   <-----total nitrogen
- gastrin (redo)  <---low stomach acid

these tests can be done next time i go to lifelabs:
- calcitonin <----my tsh levels were lowish, so hyperthyroidism is a distinct possibility.
- osteocalcin  ($65 at lifelabs)   <--- bone turnover, so it also measures resorption. key.
+ 12-hour fasting tests

these tests can be done next time i go to dynacare <----not right away
- celiac ($90) <-----maybe. last thing to check....
- igf-1 ($70)  <-----formation marker. wait for other markers, first. mostly of use if i try formation medication or as a metric for fracture risk and as a reaction to gh results.
- b-alp <----- formation marker. take with others.
- glutathione?
- pyruvate?

not yet ordered:
- psa: ($35 at lifelabs ) <---cea result makes this pointless right now.

this test is covered by ohip but is not offered anywhere in the region:
- serum oxalate <----iron blocker
- pyruvate <----manganese

this test is only available in a california lab:
-hepcidin <----hormone that regulates iron absorption

these absorption tests were skipped, for now:
- vitamin e
- vitamin k   <----inr, ptt fine
- selenium
- molybdenum
- manganese
- iodine  <----?
- copper serum <----ceruloplasmin fine

and, here's my list for absorption regarding my diet:

a - absorbing at high levels
b1 - next time
b2 - next time
b3 - next time
b5 - next time
b6 - next time
b7 - next time
b9 - absorbing at high levels
b12 - absorbing, and increasing stores
c - absorbing, at saturated levels
d - absorbing, but a tad low. i should check again soon.
e - pending  (paid)
cholesterol - perfect
k1 - pending (paid)  <----but ptt, inr, fibrinogen normal
fluoride?
aluminum?
sodium - absorbing & regulating
potassium - absorbing & regulating
magnesium - absorbing & regulating
phosphorus - absorbing & regulating
chlorine - absorbing & regulating
calcium - absorbing & regulating
chromium - next time
manganese - pending (paid) <----but,  pyruvate kinase is coming immediately
iron - not absorbing in food, but absorbing in pills
nickel - next time
copper - absorbing & regulating
zinc - absorbing & regulating
selenium - pending (paid) <----- need to find access to glutathione test, not priority right now
molybdenum - not available <---but pancreatic function is normal
iodine - pending (paid) <-----note that tsh is lowish. checking pth. no sign of goiter. dietary sodium is low...
mercury - pending
lead - low
this is apparently highly controversial, to the point that prescribing growth hormone is potentially illegal in the united states (?).

let's measure growth hormone levels and go from there...
i did get some sleep last night and need to spend the weekend catching up and finishing filing for good.
yeah, i don't sleep much and i don't want to...and that seems to be very bad for your bones....

i would be willing to take hormones to stimulate the effect of sleeping on my cells while i'm awake, and i actually think it would be a great breakthrough in science to replace sleeping with a stimulant pill instead - instead of sleeping however many hours a day, we could just pop a pill once a day, instead.
but, what's the point if i'm still able to spread it after getting vaccinated?

...but i'm confident at this point that my markers for bone formation seem to be fine, and that if an ongoing problem still exists then it isn't with the ability to replace bone, so much as it may be with too much resorption.

we'll see what the markers say.
updating this...

my next set of requested tests will be to do with low stomach acid and so far includes:

- aluminum 

i also need to check for bone resorption markers, on top of the bone formation markers:
- hydroxyproline urine, total + free (covered)
- c-terminal telopeptide (not covered)
-  deoxypyridinoline - urine  (dynacare only) (not covered)
+
- oxalate urine (covered), if i'm doing urine

there's apparently a long list of these, neither corporate lab seems to cover many of them and they're all of questionable value. let me just do the one, plus osteocalcin, for now. but ask if he has good ideas about that...

instead of igf-1, which is not covered, i could check for gh first. so,
-growth hormone <----formation marker

let's check for lyme disease, and ask about other parasites like giardia.

and, let's check this again (monthly standing):
- vitamin d
- calcium +  albumin
- magnesium
- phosphorus
- alp
- b12
- ferritin +  iron + iron sat + tibc
- estradiol + progesterone + estrone
- cholesterol + cbc +  gastrin + reticulocyte
- pth + tsh + calcitonin + gh + cortisol + insulin

i'll take those out of the list as they become less of a concern.

for the gastro:
i'm still concerned about diverticulitis, but if the likelihood of tumours is minimal due to the cea test, i should ask for a virtual scope instead. that way, we can figure out if i need antibiotics or surgery without risking a tear, or agitating it further. ask about gardia fecal testing. also ask about low stomach acid (gastrin) & salicylates.

for the endo:
i need to do some more research on pth, as well, and what the following combo suggests:

- calcium, 9.6 (highish but normal)
- vitamin d, 35 ng/ml (lowish but normal)
- pth, 55 pmol/l (highish but normal)
- calcitonin, ?
- gh, ?

i can grasp by looking at the numbers that highish pth with lowish vitamin d makes sense, but it's not clear to me if that's clinically relevant, perfectly healthy or even just a random coincidence. and i think i need to wait for calcitonin to draw conclusions.

- i need to do research on how sporadic sleeping schedules might affect cortisol and if it might affect bone density.

- up estrogen intake to estrogen injections and estrace pills, until the testicles are taken out. do another bmd scan and try the formation medication after that?

=====

these tests are pending at lifelabs:
- asca   <---crohn's
- mercury <---iron blocker
- p-anca/c-anca  <----colitis

this test is pending from dynacare:
- fit test #2  <----colon cancer

this test requires a 12 hour fast:
- amino acid fractionation   <-----total nitrogen
- gastrin (redo)  <---low stomach acid

these tests can be done next time i go to lifelabs:
- calcitonin <----my tsh levels were lowish, so hyperthyroidism is a distinct possibility.
- osteocalcin  ($65 at lifelabs)   <--- bone turnover, so it also measures resorption. key.
+ 12-hour fasting tests

these tests can be done next time i go to dynacare <----not right away
- celiac ($90) <-----maybe. last thing to check....
- igf-1 ($70)  <-----formation marker. wait for other markers, first. mostly of use if i try formation medication or as a metric for fracture risk and as a reaction to gh results.
- b-alp <----- formation marker. take with others.
- glutathione?
- pyruvate?

not yet ordered:
- psa: ($35 at lifelabs ) <---cea result makes this pointless right now.

this test is covered by ohip but is not offered anywhere in the region:
- serum oxalate <----iron blocker
- pyruvate <----manganese

this test is only available in a california lab:
-hepcidin <----hormone that regulates iron absorption

these absorption tests were skipped, for now:
- vitamin e
- vitamin k   <----inr, ptt fine
- selenium
- molybdenum
- manganese
- iodine  <----?
- copper serum <----ceruloplasmin fine

and, here's my list for absorption regarding my diet:

a - absorbing at high levels
b1 - next time
b2 - next time
b3 - next time
b5 - next time
b6 - next time
b7 - next time
b9 - absorbing at high levels
b12 - absorbing, and increasing stores
c - absorbing, at saturated levels
d - absorbing, but a tad low. i should check again soon.
e - pending  (paid)
cholesterol - perfect
k1 - pending (paid)  <----but ptt, inr, fibrinogen normal
fluoride?
aluminum?
sodium - absorbing & regulating
potassium - absorbing & regulating
magnesium - absorbing & regulating
phosphorus - absorbing & regulating
chlorine - absorbing & regulating
calcium - absorbing & regulating
chromium - next time
manganese - pending (paid) <----but,  pyruvate kinase is coming immediately
iron - not absorbing in food, but absorbing in pills
nickel - next time
copper - absorbing & regulating
zinc - absorbing & regulating
selenium - pending (paid) <----- need to find access to glutathione test, not priority right now
molybdenum - not available <---but pancreatic function is normal
iodine - pending (paid) <-----note that tsh is lowish. checking pth. no sign of goiter. dietary sodium is low...
mercury - pending
lead - low

Friday, June 18, 2021

the last release that i left off at, dated to may 2003, was inri074, the leaving ottawa recording that i put together right before i took off.

so, that's 75 releases from 1996-2003.

and, it's time to get to inri075, now.

=====

around october, 2002 i met a friend. i was sort of in need of a friend, and i mean that in the friend sense. but, the mental condition i was in was the explanation of why i needed a friend, if you see what i mean; i was completely unstable in this period and did all kinds of absurd things, which isolated me - and i wasn't getting any better. 

i dropped out of school under the realization that i was walking down a path that wasn't getting me anywhere close to what i wanted out of life. i ended up working three jobs to raise money for gender reassignment, and it crossed me paths with somebody that was also trying to think of ways to get out of the box in terms of ways to exist. 

she was trying to save up money to go to british columbia. it was some kind of warped take on the grapes of wrath, where everything works out perfectly. but, the rent was eating into her savings, which was making the goal seem impossible. well, unless we stopped having fun. 

so, i suggested she should just stay at my parents place. part of it was a hope that she would move her drum kit in, although that didn't happen. and, i might add that this was done with all of the reckless abandon that could be contemplated - we were moving stuff in without even asking, it was really remarkable. 

and, it seemed to me that we were getting pretty close over that period. 

so, when the time came that she had all that money put aside to go to bc, it was kind of a downer to let her go. and, she initially wanted to go with a friend who dropped out. so, i ended up going across the country with her. 

now, i need to be clear: we weren't planning on coming back. we were going to pick fruit or something - we didn't know, exactly, we'd figure it out when we got there. 

so, this was meant as a sort of farewell to certain people i hadn't talked to in months and didn't care if i was leaving, anyways. i think it let me work some things out on weird subconscious levels, but the truth is that these songs really aren't about anybody except me, and there's no use in pretending they are - i just liked the idea of a farewell disc. 

this disc was initially passed around with a cut up version of the pretentious untitled mix at the end, but this was almost immediately ejected from future burns and is not present on this ep due to the poor quality of the mix. the remaining five tracks became combined into what i now call my eighth symphony. 

written and recorded in late 2002 and early 2003. this was initially uploaded unmodified from a cd-r rip on may 3, 2015, but this was replaced with a version from source on nov 29, 2017 due to clipping due to an unrealized normalization on the burn. disc finalized as symph008 on nov 29, 2017. as always, please use headphones. 

the hidden track is the final version and also appears on my ninth record, {e} (inri08x): jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/e 

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (2003, 2015, 2017). 

released may 3, 2003 

j - guitar, effects, bass, synth, voice, piano, drum programming, generative programming (sounder), granular synthesis, sound design, soundscaping, loops, bowls, claps, tables, ebow, orchestral sequencing, digital wave editing, sampling, production, composition 

the various rendered electronic orchestras include piano, synth pad, choir and string section.

yeah...

...i'd suspect that any medication that increases bone formation is going to be carcinogenic, in the long run. what i really want is a way to shut resorption down to almost nothing.

and, you do that with the kind of estrogen injections i've tried to avoid.

if i'm sure i'm getting the testicles removed now, these injections could potentially be temporary, and just intended as a bone density therapy, more than anything else. and, i could potentially keep up with the pills for the estrone, too.

let me focus more on resorption markers, first.
Recent study has also shown that the activity of serum total ALP >129 U/L is used as an indicator for osteoporosis in men [16]. Moreover, the decrease of total ALP has been demonstrated with the treatment with alendronate from 79.7 U/L to 64.8 U/L [17]. The results indicate that total ALP can be used as an indicator to reflect the efficiency of drug treatment for osteoporosis.

so, if i'm in the 61-63 range then i've already been through treatment...

this would indicate that my osteoblasts are working correctly, and i'm able to reform bone that's been resorbed. but, what i really want is resorption markers that measure osteoclasts and i don't think any of the markers i asked for actually do that.

the alp came in at about the same as before - 63 iu/l. it was 61 last time. so, if i'm losing bone density right now, it's not bad enough to boost the alp up into elevated ranges.

what i really need to check for is b-alp, but that lab doesn't do it (and misunderstood the lab sheet). that's fine - this is helpful. i mean, it's the delta that's valuable, and it's within any reasonable margin of error.

that is probably enough to conclude i'm not actively leeching density but rather have a historical problem. there's really no way for me to know if the malnutrition was when i was 15 or 25, but i need to know if i need to change something now or if i've already changed it. but, i want as much information as i can get before i move forwards with the orchidectomy, asap.
this actually strikes me as a promotion for ms. fullerton and a substantive demotion for mr. phillips.

https://www.thestar.com/politics/provincial/2021/06/18/doug-ford-dumps-five-minister-in-cabinet-shuffle.html
there are a trickle of issues coming through - heart issues, blood clot issues. if i was a 75 year old diabetic, i'd be willing to take that risk. but, why would i take a risk like that when i'm young and healthy? 

it's not in my self-interest.

sorry.
i want longer term studies - like, ten years - before i risk injecting something into me that will almost certainly provide me with no measurable benefit, whatsoever.

there's no upside to me getting vaccinated - it's an entirely pointless, stupid risk.

and, by the time the studies are done, i'll be in a more appropriate demographic for it.
if you're going to give me the opportunity to stop traffic like this to stand up for my rights, you can be sure that i'll gleefully do it.
i don't think it's appropriate for the government to attempt to coerce healthy, young people into getting vaccinated for a mild virus in some kind of quixotic quest to win on twitter.

i currently have no plans to get vaccinated, and if that slows everything down then the government should change it's policies - or risk an election in an unnecessary lockdown due to it's own foolishness.


i got my fit test dropped off tonight...

i didn't catch up on eating last night before i passed out and have decided i had to skip a day. listen, if i can get 5 days a week in on this schedule, i'm eating a 1000x times better than i ever have. but, i'm a skinny person and i can only eat so much...

but, the way i'm going to do this is to make the art show demo the divine amoebas single. i mean, that;s what it actually is - half-finished demos from the isomorphism, and the completed divine amoebas. that's what a single parked there would be, too. it also doubles as the "material completed in my mom's apartment" release, along with the cassette demos (sarah's) and all you need (dad's basement). so, that period splits cleanly along "where i lived" lines, and then i just need to finish the lost symphony and insert it as inri078.

i intend to get that finished tonight, but we'll see what actually happens.
if fully vaccinated people are spreading the virus, then unvaccinated people are no more of a threat than vaccinated ones are and the logical conclusion is to open the border immediately...

but, we're not dealing with rational actors or reasonable people in the pmo, nowadays - we're dealing with a clique of amateurs that are reading the polls like tea leaves, basing policy on mass ignorance and then trying to trick you into thinking it's science.

it's beyond frustrating, but i saw this coming months ago and don't expect the border to open in any substantive way until after the next election, whenever it is.
At the same time, we also know we have to hit our targets of 75 per cent vaccinated with the first dose, at least 20 per cent vaccinated with the second dose before we can start loosening things up because even a fully vaccinated individual can pass on COVID-19 to someone who is not vaccinated

this is a characteristically incoherent statement from justin trudeau - he does this every other day, and has been for years.

if fully vaccinated people are spreading the virus (which is dubious, to be kind), then what's the point of getting vaccinated? we could get to 100% vaccination and not succeed in stopping the spread of the virus.

so, there's two ways to parse something absurd like this from your acting, fuctional head of state:

1) you can be naive and decide that they're idiots and don't understand what they're saying and have no business writing policy - which all evidence suggests is true. or
2) the government is (not so) subtly broadcasting that this never really ends. and i'm increasingly worried about this...

there's no necessary mutual exclusion, either.

tumours are ubiquitous.

everybody has tumours.

you have tumours.

the question is if these are big, aggressive tumours or small, benign ones. and, what that cea result says is that my tumors are at least small, if not benign. and, that's all the test can say. you need other tests to determine if your small tumors are benign or not...

i'm a smarty-pants, i know how to read these results and don't need a government to protect me from my own stupidity in misinterpreting them.
testing my cortisol is difficult because my schedule is all over the place.

but, it came in at 325, which is highish for pm but normal for am. it's not absolutely high.
cea is 1.4 - very low.

along with the negative fit test, chances of cancer - including chances of bone cancer - just plummeted to almost zero. but, i'll be talking to a gastroenterologist in the next few days and an endocrinologist in august. my doctor is going to strangle me because i keep proving him wrong and he is getting pissed off about it, but, i mean...

ok.

that was the scary thing.

but i still don't know what the fuck the problem actually is...

i'm actually probably going to ask the doctor to take all of these results and sit down with a bunch of other doctors. we've tested for almost everything and found nothing, except lowish gastrin and highish salicylates - both of which are vanishingly obscure.

markers for crohn's and colitis are still coming, but cea should actually be elevated for both of those, too. so, if there's anything in there, it's pretty small...

my pth was normal, so the bone issue isn't due to hyperparathyroidism. and, the other markers are still coming.
this made me chuckle:


i tried to search for some actual case law that cites microaggressions, and i found articles accusing law of being a microaggression, itself.

tell it to the judge, right?

it's a bunch of bullshit...
a few loose ends so they're written down...

i thought about releasing an alternate lp that included the following 2003 components, which are basically comprehensive, in sequence:

1. reflections
2. all you need
3. into oblivion
4. like divine amoebas
5. interplanetary isomorphism

...in some combination of vocal and instrumental tracks but everything's worked out already.

- if you want the full pieces with vocals, listen to inri074, inri076 & inri079 in order.
- what about without vocals? well, like divine amoebas only exists instrumentally on inri077 right now and all you need doesn't exist instrumentally at all. so, i made a decision to put an instrumental version of all you need (along with the pending noise intro) as a segue between reflections and isomorphism on the first side of the upcoming trivial group 2xlp. in that space, into oblivion is remixed and segues directly into isomorphism; in fact, they're combined into a single, epic song. further, isomorphism then runs directly into xenophanes. so, there's nowhere to put amoebas, except right after all you need, and that's not sitting with me well, not for the least reason being that the track is released on ftaa. so, should the version on ftaa be stripped of vocals, then, to place the instrumental version on a record? then, i'd have to move the vocal version to a single. of the major records (inri, inriched, inridiculous, deny everything, jjjjjjjjj, jjjjjjjjj^2, ftaa), the only vocal track is stress - everything else is discarded as singles. so, this would only be the second retained vocal track. do i really want that, or do i want a vocals-only single for amoebas like the others? is that too much overlap? 
- so, i was looking at a divine amoebas single, which is another way to do it. if i do this, i'll need to date it to right before the art show demo, and push the ftaa up inri081.
-  i'm going to explore the idea of splicing the end of all you need with the end of a transfer for the record, though.
- that said, there will be a vocals-only compilation released at the end of period 3 with all of the vocal tracks from periods 2 &3 (post-inrimoved).
the update for june 17th is coming soon, and it needs to be the completed version of ftaa record - my 7th lp, finally.

we'll see if i stop there or keep going.
so, the period 3.1 post for june 16th was the art show demo, inri079, which i uploaded as is some time ago and dated to early january, 2004. there will be a number of historical demos released over period 3 that contain half-finished music because i circulated them that way; it's really a relic of the period when cd burning was easily accessible and everybody listened to music that way.

what it is is an unfinished mix of the interplanetary isomorphism symphony, with the track "like divine amoebas" inserted into the middle. "all you need" had already been dropped by then, but the symphony is simply not yet complete.

so, i mean, it's a historical relic, but it's also interesting for what it is - as an alternate lp.

the bulk of this will appear on the trivial group lp in completed instrumental form, whereas "like divine amoebas" appears largely as is on the ftaa ep. 


updating this...

my next set of requested tests will be to do with low stomach acid and so far includes:

1) gastrin (fast)
2) amino acid fractionation (fast)
3) aluminum 

=====

these tests are pending at lifelabs:
- asca   <---crohn's
- mercury
- pth
- cortisol
- cea
- p-anc/c-anca
- alp (again)

this test is pending from dynacare:
- fit test #2

this test requires a 12 hour fast:
- amino acid fractionation   <-----total nitrogen
- gastrin (redo)

these tests can be done next time i go to lifelabs:
- calcitonin
- osteocalcin  ($65 at lifelabs)   
+ 12-hour fasting tests

these tests can be done next time i go to dynacare:
- celiac ($90) <-----maybe.
- igf-1 ($70)  <------wait for other markers, first
- b-alp
- glutathione?
- pyruvate?

not yet ordered:
- psa: ($35 at lifelabs )

this test is covered by ohip but is not offered anywhere in the region:
- serum oxalate
- pyruvate <----manganese

this test is only available in a california lab:
-hepcidin

these tests were skipped, for now:
- vitamin e
- vitamin k
- selenium
- molybdenum
- manganese
- iodine
- copper serum

and, here's my list for absorption regarding my diet:

a - absorbing at high levels
b1 - next time
b2 - next time
b3 - next time
b5 - next time
b6 - next time
b7 - next time
b9 - absorbing at high levels
b12 - absorbing, and increasing stores
c - absorbing, at saturated levels
d - absorbing, but a tad low. i should check again soon.
e - pending  (paid)
cholesterol - perfect
k1 - pending (paid)  <----but ptt, inr, fibrinogen normal
fluoride?
aluminum?
sodium - absorbing & regulating
potassium - absorbing & regulating
magnesium - absorbing & regulating
phosphorus - absorbing & regulating
chlorine - absorbing & regulating
calcium - absorbing & regulating
chromium - next time
manganese - pending (paid) <----but,  pyruvate kinase is coming immediately
iron - not absorbing in food, but absorbing in pills
nickel - next time
copper - absorbing & regulating
zinc - absorbing & regulating
selenium - pending (paid) <----- need to find access to glutathione test, not priority right now
molybdenum - not available <---but pancreatic function is normal
iodine - pending (paid) <-----note that tsh is lowish. checking pth. no sign of goiter. dietary sodium is low...
mercury - pending
lead - low

Thursday, June 17, 2021

today;s post is inri073.

=======

it was in may of 2015 that i first contemplated the idea of a chamber works. i was creating compilations to end my second period, when i realized that a couple of the tracks that did not fit well into the orchestral works might work better as chamber pieces. so, the chamber works was intended as a kind of companion disc to the orchestral works, both to offer a different flavour and to collect the remaining tracks into a compilation of serious music, so they are not left out. 

so, i went back and did a systematic evaluation of the period 2 material to see which tracks could or could not be converted into chamber pieces. the last three mixes were created at this time, while the first was removed of clicks. 

then, i stopped. i decided that an electronic chamber works was an idea of questionable worth, and i should put the idea aside for a bit and take a look at the idea again upon reconstruction of the period 1 tapes. 

what the issue really comes down to is how good the electronic strings sound. does this actually sound like chamber music, or does it sound like a computer creating chamber music? and, if it sounds like a computer, is the issue resolvable somehow? 

when i came back to completing period 2 in the fall of 2017, i decided in favour of the release, as the sound fonts are convincing enough, even if one needs to ignore a few relics here and there. tracks two and three were subsequently added to the compilation. 

i decided at the end that this format has some future to it, whether it is fully realistic or not. string music will probably never go away. but, composers are going to find themselves less and less interested in actual physical reproduction, as time moves forward. the question of realism in the tracks is consequently somewhat misplaced, as the chamber music of the future is likely to be performed by computers, and sound like it just a little bit. 

initially written and recorded between 2001-2003 and remixed and recorded further over 2014-2015. an idea for this compilation was developed over the last week of may, 2015, but it was not finished or released at that time. corrected and expanded from october, 2017 to january, 2018. finally released & finalized as lp022 on jan 14, 2018. as always, please use headphones. 

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (2014, 2015, 2017, 2018). 

released may 2, 2003 

j - controller input, programming, effects processing, mixing, digital wave editing, composition. 

the various rendered electronic orchestras include piano, orchestral drum kit, violin, guitar, viola, cello, contrabass, various string sections and choir.

so, i got pth, cortisol, alp (again), p-anca & cea done today and i'm in for the night.

last night was a cleaning night, and i'm at least done in the studio space. so, tonight needs to be about catching up a little on what i was doing.

i'll have a more detailed write-up when i'm in for a longer period.
the left really isn't supposed to be about everybody being the same, even if it's supposed to be about treating everybody equally under the law. in mathematics, we have a separation between identity and equality - and this is useful in computer science, as well. we can decide that the values of two variables are the same, or that the two variables are the same thing, and these are entirely different concepts.

the idea that everybody is the same is actually fascism, not socialism. the idea that everybody deserves equal treatment in order to uphold their individuality is what socialism and liberalism are supposed to be getting at.

so, marx' statement was from each according to their ability, to each according to their needs -  and that presupposes that differences of ability do in fact exist, as well as differences in need. the way to grapple with that in education is to teach to people's strengths and encourage them to maximize their potential, not to argue that we're all just equal worker drones; the latter idea isn't marx, it's mussolini (perhaps via lenin).

and, this is consistent. people label these utterly fascistic ideas that originated on the far-right as "socialism", and then decide that their fascism is left-wing. 

the era of orwell, people.

i keep stressing this. and, nobody's going to listen - they're just going to take me away.
canada is fast-tracking itself to mediocrity and stagnation.

if we're not already there...
the reason i was moved into the honours stream from the advanced stream is that a perceptive teacher realized that i was being picked on by some idiot jocks, and it was the best way to protect me from being harmed by them.

the idea that you should just put everybody in the same room together and expect them to get along and work at the same pace is entirely backwards type thinking, and precisely what's wrong with the society.

that said, i realized when i got to the honours stream that they didn't put me in the smart class but rather put me in the rich class, and the ideas underlying the implementation were shoddy, at best. and, i wasn't rich - or at least wasn't culturally rich (my stepmother had some money, and by this time i was living fairly comfortably, even if i grew up in a ghetto).

if the program was implemented accurately - and was actually about smarts rather than class - then it could have been a way out, for me. instead, i got bored, skipped a lot of classes and ended up tuning out.

so, i would call on the system to drop this stupidity about education "creating inequities" and instead refocus on what the honours stream is supposed to be about, which is allowing the brightest kids to escape the collectivism of public education. we're going to end up stagnant and backwards if we take our brightest and force them into the same stream as the dumbest...

or, maybe you just want to purge them, instead?

this sounds like it's more about tracking your phone than it is about reducing the spread of the disease.

yeah, right in time for the change of rules.

asshole...

there is no imaginable reason why any legal entity ought to be allowed to do something as absurdly antisocial as own 400 houses in this country.

the government needs to step in and stop this from happening - it's ridiculous.
is property freedom or theft?

well, its impossible - because it's both.

but, the best we're going to do in a bourgeois state is bring in reasonable limits, and there is actually no constitutional right to property in canada - we can write these laws, here.
there should be a limit on how many homes a corporation or person can buy, set to around 10 or so.