would i actually vote bloc if i was in quebec?

it would really depend on the candidate.

i don't think this debate was likely to change anybody's mind, unless you were a green supporter - while may was plucky and aggressive in the english debate, she came off as whiny and annoying, here. singh came off as a clown in both debates, imo. trudeau does in fact continue to remind me of harper, but what do you do when the opposition is this bad?

that leaves blanchet, and while i'm not sure his performance would have swayed my vote, he didn't do anything to lose it - except that strange comment about supply management that i think should be followed up on.

so, i guess my takeaway is that if the election wasn't between trudeau and blanchet when the night started then it was by the time it ended.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the argument you hear from free marketers is that supply management inflates prices, but it's largely garbage.

abolishing supply management will lead to higher profits for the bourgeois layer, which is why they want to do it, and it will help american farmers, but it won't reduce prices; don't let the free market fundamentalists trick you into thinking it will.

market theory just simply doesn't describe the reality we live in, and you're not going to get much of anywhere trying to apply it to get meaningful results. all that following market theory will do is mislead you into making bad policy decisions.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i get the idea that blanchet is maybe a little bit to the right of the last couple of bloc leaders and this is kind of well understood and being broadly overlooked. they're attracting swaths of ndp voters, many of whom were bloc voters a few cycles ago, but they seem to think it has more to do with legault. i think this is a miscalculation...

regardless, for them to come out against supply management out of nowhere would be a major policy shift, and i'm not sure anybody's had that discussion.

i think blanchet should clarify his position on the matter.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i'm watching the french debate, and that jagmeet singh, it's...

he's facile.

i remember reading those mr and mrs. books when i was a kid, but it's a childish thing to say at a debate. and, how about the pledge to "personally" do everything he can to stop climate change, as though his costume is really just code that he's actually a superhero (apologies to cory booker).

the things he's saying are just ridiculous. i can't, for a second, believe that this is convincing anybody. but, how powerful is the concept of identity in the south asian community?

but, i'm posting more to draw attention to a sideswipe that yves blanchet makes at supply management, which really took me off guard.

is the bloc changing it's position on supply management? what the fuck was that all about?

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

when i agree with the ndp on social policy, it's usually by accident - they generally take a path that involves a lot of moralizing and soul-searching, whereas i just want to look at the evidence.

so, with the gays, for example.

the ndp were awful on queer issues for a long time, because they were a christian party. but, as the christian left has evolved, they've taken on your usual contrived christian-left positions. you love the sinner, but hate the sin. you accept god's creation. all that kind of bullshit.

so, you look at their policies on the surface, and they seem relatively decent, but when you scratch the surface, you realize they're actually awful.

trudeau's father had the famous line - the government has no place in the bedrooms of the nation. and, i'm far more in agreement with this than i am with some mental gymnastics about religious tolerance.

but, my actual position is that the science is pretty clear that we actually exist in nature - that this is just biologically normal.

this is just one example. these subtleties are across the spectrum of issues, and underlie my extreme discomfort in supporting so-called left-religionists - our agreement is actually quite shallow, and any coalition is unlikely to last very long.

i need to be supporting secularism as best as i can, not pretending i agree with these groups, when i don't.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

so, i want a secular party with a science-based policy agenda. let's look at the options.

1) are the conservatives a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? no. they're a conservative values party with a religion-centered policy agenda. next.

2) are the liberals a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? you know, they used to be one, and they still talk that way. it's kind of up in the air. but, they at least have a history of it.

3) are the ndp a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? no. they came out of the prairie gospel, built themselves up on the back of a christian eugenicist and are being led by a fundamentalist sikh. they've historically been the christian left, and they still don't seem to care much about science as an operating policy.

4) are the greens a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? i was hoping they would be. and, maybe they might become one. but, not with their "jesus is my daddy" current leader.

5) are the bloc a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? yes. but, i can't vote for them.

6) is the ppc a secular party with a science-based policy agenda? no. they reject science, outright.

so, while i'm actually an anarcho-communist, i'm a natural liberal, here, in this spectrum. there's no bakuninist-kropotkinist party. as an anarchist, a secularist and an atheist, there are reasons i tend to lean towards the liberals - and not the so-called "christian left".

but, the liberals want to abandon their legacy, and the greens are not yet ready to move into it.

if i could find a way to get a secularist, science-focused green party to hover over trudeau until he's gone, that would be a step forwards. but, i don't want the "left-religionist" ndp hovering over him - that would be a step backwards.

the best i can do is do my part to put the liberals back in and keep shit disturbing.

and, the way they're going to win this is to take seats away from the conservatives and the ndp in ontario. i can make a difference. i should.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i know i'm disenfranchised. i've known that for years.

i'm not looking for a party to identify with; there isn't one i'm going to identify with. they're all terrible.

i'm trying to methodically work through the options and, with very careful attention to evidence and logic, weigh out which option is the least worst.

so, don't misinterpret my vote as an endorsement. it's not one.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the fundamental problem right now is that the liberals are having an identity crisis.

i'm the liberal, here.

trudeau's a fucking conservative.

so, how do we organize a way to let the liberals retake control of the liberal party? a minority government would be step one. but, these options are worse - i'm not cutting off my nose to spite my face.

brian masse is a douchebag and a waste of a seat in the commons. i'll be happy to see him go.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i mean, this isn't a new position. i've known this the whole time.

if what i want is secularism and a science-based society, then my best vehicle is the liberals - even if it means starting a fight internally. i'm not getting that from the conservatives.

my goal here the whole time was to force trudeau to resign, to trigger a leadership battle. i never really jumped ship. this was a tactic from the start. i am hoping that trudeau's replacement will be more committed to secularist values, and more interested in putting science at the centre of policy. trudeau talks the talk here, but it's lip service. i want somebody that takes these things seriously.

i'm not a christian. i'm not into saving the country's heritage (i'm not celebrating thanksgiving, this weekend). i don't want free markets. i don't want a petro-state.

i want full communism - and i actually think the liberals are the best way to get there.

so, i mean, i still want trudeau to resign immediately, even if i have to vote for him.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the conservatives are awful on economics.

it's a non-starter.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

so, why don't i just vote conservative?

because i'm a communist - i don't believe in free markets, i want high taxes for the rich, etc.

this is the fundamental point i'm trying to get across: the pseudo-left is too liberal, meaning not socialist enough. if the ndp and greens are just going to run as pro-market liberal parties, what's the point? just let the liberals govern.

i'm not a values voter. i don't want to "save the country's heritage". i'm an atheist - i want to move forwards into a science-focused reality.

the party with the neo-con christian minister doesn't seem very socialist to me; nor does the party with the straight edge sikh that is so religious that he won't cut his beard.

if there was an actual leftist party here that supported actual left-wing principles, i'd be all over it. but we don't have that - we have three liberal parties, and i'm more comfortable with the real thing than the fakers.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

if you flip through this, you'll see i've made repeated reference to this idea of the ndp becoming an ethnic conservative party - "conservatives for brown people", more or less.

i thought that was a cycle or two away, though.

well, we have a hypothesis, anyways. i guess i can make some sense of it.

let's see where the numbers are on tuesday.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

but, if we are seeing a movement of south asian identity voters from the conservatives to the ndp, who does that help?

well, it would help the liberals, actually.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

and, yes - the conservatives tend to do well with, and sometimes outright win, the south asian vote. so, there's plenty of voters to potentially target based on identity.

the assumption for years amongst everybody was that this happens because they're inclined towards conservative value systems.

so, if that's the crux of the movement, it would have to be gut-driven, because he's not offering them anything they've historically been attracted to. i guess there could have been a mass epiphany in the south asian community, but you'd have to provide me with some evidence.

as mentioned: i'm skeptical. i think this is a blip. but, if it isn't, what is it? that's my guess - south asian identity voters moving from blue to orange.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

but, if you're going to take the data at face value, what's it actually saying?

i would guess that it's saying that there's a movement amongst recent immigrant voters away from the conservatives to the ndp, and it would be driven mostly by identity. how else do you parse that?

so, is it possible that a lot of recent indian immigrants turned on the debate and said "actually, i like the guy that looks like me better"?

i guess.

but, why were they voting conservative, then?

i know better than to get too rational about identity politics - they don't make sense, and you shouldn't pretend they do. it's voting with your gut. you can't work it out.

but, if that's what we're seeing, it's emergent - this is something we've never seen in this country, before.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i expect that they'll come back down to around 15% or so. that's what the mean seems to be.

so, it does seem to be that the firms having them in the lower end - 13 or worse - have been coming in a little out of bounds, and are underestimating them.

at 15%, they're still not likely to do very well, if it's still mostly localized in bc.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i just find the premise of voting for this guy to be too baffling to take seriously.

it seemed clear for a long time that we just weren't going to do that, and i don't see what changed over the last week, besides, perhaps, a lot of conservatives going to the cottage for the weekend.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

and, am i going to keep making fun of his beard into perpetuity?

absolutely.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

yeah. i'm sorry. i'm hungry, and sick, and impatient and jumpy - i should have looked at this a little more closely before i posted.

look at this picture:

it's movement from 13 to 18, if you start at 13. but, it's not movement from 13 to 18 if you start at 15, which is what should actually be done here. i (accidentally) cherry picked the data. a better picture of it indicates that, while 18 is at the top of the range, it's nothing to get excited about, just yet.

it's maybe the very beginning of movement. or it's maybe just a trick in the sample.

so, i'm not conceding a signal, after all; i'm only conceding that there is evidence of a signal developing.

you've gotta give this a few more days. so, let's lay down conditions before hand.

if the next batch of sample comes in and the ndp is higher than 20%, then that's signal. if it flops around at 18-19%, then the signal is fading. and, if it falls down, it's just fluctuation around the mean - and likely explained by the long weekend, rather than the debate or a bradley effect.

what that does, perhaps, is give us a better understanding of where they're actually at.

so, calm down.

we're not under imminent threat of the magic beard veto, just yet.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i mean, consider the premise, here.

i actually have to go out and vote to make sure that a guy that thinks he has a magic beard doesn't have a veto in government.

it's absurd.

we should have never got this far into the process in the first place, where i have to take this possibility seriously.

c'mon, canada. wake up.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i don't want a guy that thinks he has a magic beard holding the balance of power.

i didn't take him seriously enough to meaningfully worry about it, and at this point i'm kind of disappointed in the country for making me have to actually be afraid of that. yikes. but, so be it...

the liberals are supposed to do better than this.

there's something odd in the numbers, though - it seems like the ndp is eating more into the conservatives than the liberals. that's hard to make sense of in any other way besides a bradley effect, or just random fluctuations.

it's also a long weekend in canada.

yeah, i'm backing myself up on that - i'm retracting my statement. these numbers are weird. i want more data before i conclude there's a signal. it could just be that it's harder to reach conservatives this weekend, and easier to reach new democrats - because conservatives are going to care more about thanksgiving, and be more likely to go away and stuff like that.

i wish he'd post the regional breakdowns...

i have to concede that there is movement, and it is substantive. but, it's weird. and i'm not convinced it's real - this might be a bradley effect, and it might be a sample bias over the weekend.

we'll see how it works out.

but, it spooked me into committing to actually getting out to vote against singh, and i'm not backtracking on that.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

we might be dealing with a bradley effect, given the media coverage - the numbers might not pan out, in the end.

but, i'm not taking any chances - i'm voting liberal.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

well, i guess it's just more evidence that the people in this country aren't that bright.

he came off as a complete idiot at the debate...

https://secureservercdn.net/198.71.233.47/823.910.myftpupload.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/2019-1445-CTV-Globe-ELXN-2019-10-11.pdf

but, yeah - there's a signal developing. it's disappointing. and, it looks like i'm going to have to vote liberal to do my part to try to stop it...

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

again - i don't have memories of head trauma. maybe that's the point, though? maybe i wasn't drunk; maybe i hit my head. naw....

there's no bumps. no scrapes. i had a couple of small bruises on my arms and legs that could have been from anything and are mostly healed. there's really no sign of this...

it's gotta be bacteria.

and, my mind keeps coming back to that shit that was floating in my beer.

i'm not even 40 yet, i shouldn't need penicillin, unless i hit it hard. maybe i hit a really crusty, diseased bong on friday at the earthless show. hey, kids. it's not a joke - you need to protect yourself from crusty bongs. crusty dongs, too. but, we're talking about crusty bongs...

bong condoms? well, we all want to reduce the risk, right?

and, dude, if you're reading this: clean your bong. your dong, too. but this is about your bong.

what if i'm allergic to penicillin, though? i'm trying to remember the last time i had some. wisdom teeth, maybe? that was, like, 2000 or something.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

ok.

the headache came back. again.

i'm assuming the bacteria from the strep throat got into my sinuses, and i'm having a hard time getting it out.

i'll get some penicillin on monday, if it's not cleared up, yet.

i guess i'm napping.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i mean, do you think that jagmeet singh is running for prime minister, and was elected leader of the ndp, on the strength of the merits of his legislative accomplishments?

i'll let you look those up.

so, if it's not the merits of his legislative achievements, what is the reason he's representing the ndp?

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

does white privilege exist in canada?

again: this is an american concept, it's not a canadian one, and it's certainly not a universal one; you can't just take an idea that is specifically derived from the legacy of chattel slavery in a very small geographic area and apply it to a country and a culture where that never existed. that would be called "universalizing the specific", and is an error in logic. it's ahistorical. it's wrong...

so, if you want to talk about privilege in canada, you need to separate it from the legacy of slavery in the united states and place it in the context of canada's own race relations. in canada, we had the underground railroad, and we wrote our constitution specifically to restrict "states' rights". where anti-black racism existed, and it did, it was mostly carried out by citizens, and opposed and fought against by the state; our government almost always intervened on the side of the blacks, in an attempt to fight against the white supremacists. the history is almost totally reversed, in that sense.

does something like white privilege exist in canada? kind of. sort of...

in canada, privilege is mostly about our relationships with indigenous groups. we didn't have chattel slavery, but we did and still do have the indian act. the thrust of our colonial state was always directed at the indians, not at the blacks - who we went out of our way to free and help settle here, even though they chose not to stay for very long.

to an extent, privilege is more of a perception than a reality, and if you're convinced that it's real then it becomes real. it's a kind of solipsism, in that sense. so, it's really important to actually go out and talk to people about it...

for example, i had a conversation a few weeks ago with an asian person that was convinced he had asian privilege. there's some debate over this - is it a real thing? well, he was asian (i suppose he's still asian.), and he was convinced it did. that's his perception, i guess.

so, does somebody like jagmeet singh have asian privilege? he's not really black, of course. well, i don't know, i guess you'd have to ask him what his perception of that is. i can tell you what the statistics say about second-generation south asians in canada, and it's a pretty well off group.

and, i can point out that he's a 38 year-old with no meaningful life experience running for prime minister at the head of canada's historical third party - an opportunity that somebody with his background would be unlikely to get in pretty much any other place in the world, and that one wonders if he'd have here if he wasn't asian.

so, i don't exactly want to reject critical race theory. i'm broadly in support of critical legal theories, as ideas. but, we can't just take the american crt and apply it here. canada needs it's own crt, and nobody's really developed it, yet. i don't think...

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

you might not like the fact that canadians don't like religion, and don't want to vote for religious people, or even have religious people hold positions of power.

but, you're going to have to come to terms with it.

it's not going to change - this is the future of the country.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

no. stop.

when you live in a country where a thirty-something nobody - this guy literally has accomplished absolutely nothing in his short life - gets to run a major political party, however disastrously, then you have a lot of fucking nerve suggesting he's about to lose "because racism".

he was given an opportunity to run for an office he has no business running for - and that's a measure of the opportunity that exists here.

he's going to lose - badly - because he's a poor candidate, and because of the content of his character, as determined by proxy via his religiosity, and not because of the colour of his skin.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

listen.

they made me wait months.

i have no empathy for them, if they're going to complain i'm dragging this out.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i guess i'm up.

i have no plans for the rest of the weekend,. and don't know if i'd feel good enough to carry them out, anyways. i'm guessing i missed a good show tonight - and the weather seems to have been pleasant enough - but what do you want me to tell you? i'm sick. it happens...

my sinuses are still a little iffy. if i can avoid aspirin, that would be great, but i think i can feel the headache coming back on. yesterday was sneezing day; if i can avoid that, that's a start. but, i'm still coughing.

it is of course absolutely bizarre that that review took all week, when i was trying to do work on some legal documents, but it did, and it's done. i'm in all weekend, i have nothing in front of me. i should be able to look at finishing it up, and then making plans to file in early november (remember: i have to get to toronto to do this).

so, i'm going to get some fruit and tie up some loose ends and go from there.

even if i blow another week, don't think this isn't coming. it's a matter of 'when', not 'if'. and, there's no statutory deadline on a request for judicial review...

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the idea that yelling "you're racist!" is some kind of convincing argument, or some kind of game changer, is retarded.

i don't need polls to tell you that's not going to work.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

https://secureservercdn.net/198.71.233.47/823.910.myftpupload.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/2019-1445-CTV-Globe-ELXN-2019-10-04.pdf

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

again: the tory media is 100% behind the conservatives, and it thinks that the way to win the election is to convince liberal supporters to vote ndp, thereby splitting the vote. it knows it can't convince liberal voters to swing tory.

but, the conservatives are actually running too low right now for that to even work. and, frankly, so are the ndp.

so, you when you see a headline in the toronto sun saying "singh's numbers soar!", or whatever it said, you need to put that into context. these are tory media propaganda outlets, and it's clear as day what they're doing.

sure, i might be wrong - that's tautological. we'll find out in a day or two. but, as of right now, there has not been any significant movement in canada towards the ndp after the debates, and suggestions that there has been are disingenuous, and rooted in bad (on purpose) math.

the only significant polling movement we've been seeing is from the ndp to the bloc in quebec, which was predictable enough at the start of this.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

and, don't think the media doesn't know how to read the polls. i used to think that, too.

the media is not ignorant; the media is dishonest.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

these are the post-debate numbers, for actual scientific pollsters.

Mainstreet Research     October 10, 2019     16.6     ±2 pp     IVR (rolling)
Nanos Research           October 10, 2019     15.3     ±2.8 pp     telephone (rolling)
EKOS                          October 10, 2019     13.1     ±2.2 pp     telephone/IVR
Mainstreet Research       October 9, 2019     15.1     ±2.04 pp     IVR (rolling)
Nanos Research             October 9, 2019     14.1     ±2.8 pp     telephone (rolling)
Forum Research             October 8, 2019     13        ±3 pp     IVR
Mainstreet Research       October 8, 2019     14.3     ±2 pp     IVR (rolling)
Nanos Research             October 8, 2019     13.4     ±2.8 pp     telephone (rolling)    

nanos has a three point margin. so, a movement from 13.4 to 15.3 is within the margin of error. and, if you look at the pre-debate numbers, you'll see that he has them fluctuating around 13-16 the whole time. so, regardless of the headline, nik is not actually picking up a meaningful signal - although he has had them consistently a little higher than some of the other firms.

mainstreet has a 2 point margin, or so they claim. so, a movement from 14.3 to 16.6 is also in the margin. i would expect to see that fall tomorrow or the next day. mainstreet's numbers appear to be converging with nik's, which is a good thing, but it doesn't indicate movement.

forum and ekos have them at 13, which appears to be on the lower end of the scale.

but, the range is 10-19, and that's not a difference compared to the pre-debate numbers.

the ndp will probably lose almost all of their seats east of the rockies.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the ndp do seem to do a little better in "online polling", but that's a function of the technology - and misleading.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

and, what's my end of week polling analysis?

are the ndp up after a strong debate performance by jagmeet singh?

well, i reject the premise - it's what the tory media is trying to push to split the vote (which is a poor understanding of the situation, to begin with - there's not going to be vote splitting in this election, the conservatives are not competitive enough in urban spaces right now for that to happen). but the signal is not there. and, i don't think he looked very good in the debates, either.

the bloc are up.

everything else is flat.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

this was the opposition's election to take.

and, they failed.

that's the simplistic analysis; it's also the right one.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

if you're pissed off about the liberals winning another majority, and i don't exactly want that outcome, you need to look at the opposition.

elizabeth may is a christian neo-con; she's dangerous. i can't vote for her to hold any balance of anything.

and, jagmeet singh is a blank slate. we really don't have a clue what his politics actually are, or what will happen if we give him any power. but, he represents a party that has a history of turning on it's own voting base. and, he won't cut that damned beard...indicating he operates ideologically and idealistically, rather than rationally or logically.

i don't want to return the liberals to power - they don't deserve it.

but, there's not a better option.

just a few more days before i drop my sig, there, but - 

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

and, we don't seem to have much of any choice but to hope they do.

no, eric. it was obvious. or, at least, it was obvious that the liberals wouldn't be the beneficiary of the ndp's collapse (which, in quebec, appears to be total).

the question was whether quebec was going to swing bloc or green. they were never going to vote liberal, and they were never going to vote alberta, i mean conservative. and, it looks like the bloc won that argument.

but, i suspect the liberals are about to do very, very well in ontario.

the tory media, who still hates his father, wants it to be 1972 so they can bring out their old pinatas; i think it's more like 1997, and the dauphin is reaching to fill the shoes of the old court jester, rather than the old king. this is no ancien regime...but it does look like another majority.

https://www.cbc.ca/news/politics/grenier-liberal-bloc-2019-election-1.5317946

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

how am i feeling?

not good - the headache has lifted (no aspirin since midnight), but i'm now sneezing and coughing and stuffed up pretty badly, with a badly running nose. i guess it could be allergies, partly. but, i think it's best to stay in, tonight.

what's the update on the bike?

i can't find any obvious holes, and it seems to hold air for a while, at least. so, it may have been a prank. or, if it was the cops, they may have been looking for drugs in the rim with a knife (idiots) and left a hairline slit that takes a long time to come down. or, somebody that lives or works near where i parked it may have fucked it up by manhandling it to move it (which would have been unnecessary, but you know.). or my initial hypothesis - that somebody tried to take the tire off to steal it, only to realize it was bolted on and not easily disassembled using bike tools - was botched, which led to a minor break in the tire as it ran up against the rim. basically, it's not clear - but it does seem like there is a hole in the tube, and it seems like it's pretty small. i just pumped it up again this afternoon, and it took about an hour to deflate. so, the tube needs to be repaired or replaced. in the end, i might take a closer look at it and decide that i ran over glass somewhere. given that it seems to be small, i may even be able to patch it. i think i have the right kind of glue...

we'll take a look at this in a bit.

right now, i'm sick and tired and should take a nap.

but, we're done this crazy long review at least, finally.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

so, i was out around 17:00, a little earlier maybe, and went straight to my bike. i had a few ounces of vodka left - maybe two shots. but it tasted awful, at that point. i needed mix. so, we put that away for a few minutes...

i didn't notice anything peculiar about my bike at this point; i just unlocked it and started riding north.

i had $17 and change left, out of $120 for the weekend (which is a lot more in cad).

$80 - $15 (sacri moniti) - $15 (beethoven) - $10 (3 beer @ deluxx fluxx) - $2 (1 beer @ pop off) = $38.

$38 + $40 =  $78.

$78 - $18 (smokes + drinks)  - $5 (trumbullplex) - $18 (6 beer @ marble) - $8 (smokes) - $10 (food) - $2 (coffee @ dso) = $17.

nothing was that expensive, it just added up after a long weekend. and, remember: getting to a machine in detroit is hard. i need to deal with what i have.

i didn't budget for that extra pack of smokes, and probably wouldn't have needed it if it wasn't for the fact that i destroyed the previous one. that gets me up to $25, which is more what i was planning for, going into the dso. so, i bought a coffee instead of a beer...

cover at the post-rock show was $10, leaving me $6 + change for mix and beer, and i should say a little bit about the other show that was happening.

the initial plan was not to go to this post-rock show, with bands i was unaware of, with the exception of this local act called torus, which i had missed a few times previously; rather, the initial plan was to see a legendary psych rock act called the legendary pink dots at el club. and, if i had made it through the night with something closer to $40 than $25, i might have done that.

it was really a cost thing, primarily, i'll acknowledge that. the cover at the lpd show was $25 usd, which is about as steep as i'll ever even think about paying. i usually have a hard time, mentally, with $15. i want cover to be less than $10, usually, unless it's something spectacular. then, there's the $8 beer at el club. you'll note the cost of beer elsewhere - it's $2-$3 everywhere else. even considering that the beer at el club is 1.5 beers, you're still looking at over $5, which is like twice as much. with $25 cover, you'd better show up with at least $35 if you want to actually enjoy the night. i just didn't have it on me...

and, might lpd have been spectacular? i'm sure they were in the 80s and 90s and even a good part of the 00s. i'm a little skeptical, nowadays - and i haven't heard anything from them since the last tear garden record. they would be in their late 60s at this point, and no doubt look a lot older; i remember thinking that ka-spel was in his 70s when he was only in his 40s. so, i might have missed an awesome show, but i suspect i was a little too young for it and would have walked out feeling ripped off by a show that was a little slow and prodding for me. that's gen x, for you - always stuck between, in the glut.

i would have loved to see this band in their prime, but i think i missed it and am ok with accepting it.

but, if you do want to check them out, this is as seminal and underground and important a band as you'll ever find: https://legendarypinkdots1.bandcamp.com/album/angel-in-the-detail

they were always mid-tempo, so when i use language like slow and prodding, it's just a question of whether the edge is still there - and maybe i'm wrong, maybe it is.

so, i found this post-rock show for $10 up in hamtramck instead, and it just made more sense, in context. with the $17 i had left after the symphony, there wasn't actually a choice involved, unless i wanted to spend $10 taking out another $20 (which is closer to $30 cdn), and i didn't.

i stopped at the gas station up woodward, first, to get some mix, and was able to find a tall bottle of faygo mt dew clone for $1.20. it said it had caffeine in it; how much, wasn't clear. it did the trick. so, i'm down to $16 + change.

still no issue with the bike, heading up woodward, up grand, up oakland, over clay, past the russell and into hamtramck via the back way, which took me out to the new dodge from the south. i drove by it the first time...

cycling around a few times, i was able to find a wood post to park at, behind the store next door. i didn't check to see what the store was, and didn't think it was important. bike seemed fine when i left it there with my bag, a little before 18:00....

the kids in torus - and these are kids. really. - were out back early, hanging out in their van. they took the tool comparison as a compliment, and claimed their new material sounded like hum, which seemed like shit-talking (and turned out to be). cost of beer at new dodge: $2 on tap. so, i've got three beers left and five bands to see, and i'm hoping this works out...

the first band up was called "rags and riches" and appears to have lost their guitarist somewhere between here and kentucky, instead coming up with two percussionists and a very poppy (like, new kids on the block or backstreet boys style poppy), hip-hop oriented lead singer. there were points were they had three drummers going; the intent was clearly to make the percussion the centre of the act. i'm not sure how compelling it was, but i'd never seen anything quite like it.

i've looked for sound samples, but i can't find anything without the guitarist so you'll need to seek this out on your own.

the second act up was man mountain, and they did a type of slower moving post-rock that's become kind of standard in the genre, since some midwest kids first heard mogwai. it's that very specifically american post-rock sound that my canadian ears thinks is a little too precious and sappy. it's worth checking out as an opening band, but it's exceedingly generic, too, so you shouldn't expect to be surprised or blow away by it.

https://manmountain.bandcamp.com/

au revoir continued on, and were a little heavier, leaning more towards a pelican or caspian sound. the kids outside were talking about caspian. the effects work is maybe leaning a little towards god is an astronaut, with the spacey sweeps, but i didn't catch a synth player.

again: i enjoyed watching this perched from a bar stool after a super long night, but i like the genre, and it is generic. it's good at what it does, but don't expect any surprises out of this.

shy, low then took it up another notch, while essentially carrying on with the same basic idea. again: you pretty much know exactly what you're getting out of this before it starts.

and, torus came on at the end, and played their one 35 minute song, start to finish:

https://torusdetroit.bandcamp.com/releases

so, the sets on this night were...they were what i expected, and both a pleasant and kind of chill way to end a crazy adventure and a reminder of why i tend to avoid seeing this style of music, live. it'd been a while, it was a nice reprieve. it'll probably be a while before the next time.

i first started feeling ill on this night at around 22:00 or so, between my second and third beers at this venue.

it was early when it was done - 23:30. so, i just had to take a nice slow bike ride back to the tunnel, for 00:30. or, so i thought..

i get around the corner to my bike and realize instantly that the tire has been mangled, but i'm not entirely certain, and am still not, what was going on with it. my sweater is still in my bag, as are my empty prescription bottles, my lipstick and a few other pieces of random trash. it seemed clear that the bag had been handled, but there was no apparent effort to take anything out of it. so, what is this, then? is this vandalism? are the cops bothering me (i think they have before.)?

i tried to ride the thing down the block, and couldn't - there wasn't enough air in the tube to keep the tire on the rim. what else can i do but walk home? without rummaging through my pockets, i'm thinking that i have something like $0.50 cents on me, tops. so, i'm expecting a long walk back to the tunnel, and a long night waiting for the bus. but, there's a gas station just past the russell, on clay, maybe i can talk them into letting me try to fill it up...

i finally rummage through my pockets when i get there. the cost of air is $0.75, and i do actually have it on me. score. and, the tube seemed to take it, so i'm hoping it's enough to get home on.

i get around the corner, past grand, and ask somebody for the time: it's not yet midnight. so, as long as the tires hold, i should make it.

it got a little scary moving up woodward past the fountains at the dia, because i could feel it starting to give. but, once i got to campius martius, i knew i'd catch the bus back. and, my stomach was starting to turn on me, too - i really wanted to get home.

customs was easy, although they seem to have been expecting me. i wonder sometimes just how closely the cops are paying attention to me, as they seem to grin at me in weird ways - not unlike my dad used to, when i came home at 4:15, shitfaced, from a friend's house.

did you have a good night?

you can only weakly nod. but, i was actually pretty sober at this point, what i was noticing more was that my stomach was starting to turn. 

i decide to walk my bike home. from here for the night, to ensure i'm avoiding further damage until i can get a look at it, and there's paramedics waiting around the corner. hrmmn. i'm ok, though - i just keep walking. the cops appear to follow me most of the way home, from this point. i actually think they followed me home on friday, too.

i guess they're checking to make sure i don't have any meetings with secret russian spies on the way, there. but, listen - they'd be screwed even if they caught us. we'd use the cone of silence. they wouldn't be able to hear a thing.

i dunno. whatever.

i stopped to get some nachos on the way home, but actually had to wait for my stomach to come down a bit before i could actually eat them. and, by monday night, i was convinced i'd caught strep throat and must have been dealing with the onset of it.

so, what kind of crazy weekend is this? psychedelic rock, kraut rock and noise punk on friday, followed by a grindcore show on saturday that led into a drum 'n' bass party, beethoven's 5th at the detroit symphony orchestra and a post-rock night to close it off. it's a festival weekend every weekend in detroit, if you know where to find it.

at this stage, this appears certain to be the last long weekend of the summer. so, i'm glad i made the best of it.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i will remind you that i also have a piece for two pianos.

https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/the-symphony-of-psilocybin-induced-madness

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

listening to the conductor - who is not mark zuckerberg, but could easily be mistaken for him - introduce beethoven's fifth was a nice introduction, given the importance of the piece. we got a nice little historical overview, about the reign of terror; i perhaps didn't need it, but it was a nice perspective, nonetheless, combined with a little bit of information about the musical structure of the piece.

the dso has the talk up at their youtube site, so i'm going to post it here.

are they going to post the actual program? it seems like they're posting to youtube, which is something i'd like to maybe go back and check out. maybe i should wait a few days to see if they do.

the program was:

1) WEBER Overture to Oberon  

2) MOZART Concerto for Two Pianos and Orchestra in E-flat major, K. 316a [365]

smoke break

3) BACH Concerto No. 2 for Three Harpsichords and Orchestra in C major, BWV 1064

4) BEETHOVEN Symphony No. 5 in C minor, Op. 67

reviewing classical music is always kind of weird, 'cause, like, you're reading it off the sheets. i know, i know, there's the passion in the playing, i know, trust me, but the listener has to know the piece to get into that, and i'm only going to be to do that for the 5th.

broadly speaking, i like pretty much everything in the western art music tradition - medieval music, renaissance music, baroque music, romantic music, impressionism and minimalism - with the exception of classical and neo-classical music. in fact, that's one of the things i like about beethoven, the revolutionary overturn of the mathematical perfection of the classical period. so, when we start talking about weber (not webern, who i much prefer) and mozart and even bach, we're entering into what i actually think is the low point of the western art music tradition. yeah, i know. i'm sorry...

i can tolerate some early bach; i'm a guitarist, i kind of have to. so, he's in a different category than mozart and weber, to me, because he still has that foot in the renaissance. but, i found these particular opening pieces, none of which i was familiar with, to be kind of harmonically bland, which is my general reaction to music of that period. mozart's compositions are like doing engineering homework; beethoven's compositions are like proving new theorems from first principles.

hearing all the pianos smash against each other was kind of cool, but i otherwise found these works to be fairly forgettable.

what do you say about the actual 5th, though?

it was good.

right.

i mean, how many times have i heard this on cd? 200? 300? i've never seen it live before, though. they did it right. what else can i say?

i spent the symphony largely with my eyes closed, just zoning out into it, which isn't something i'm going to do for every piece, but is probably the right way to listen to this one.

somebody offered me a mint on my way out, which i probably needed. and, i was off to hamtramck to see the post-rock show....

we'll get back to this later.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i left the club at around 9:30 or so, drove by the sound guys (who were setting up at the art of armageddon, apparently), bought some smokes at the gas station, took another swig of that vodka (you don't think i drank all of it, do you? i can't drink 20 ounces of straight vodka, i'll pass out. there was about 5 ounces left.), parked behind the orchestra and stumbled down to the diner to get some eggs. as mentioned, i was there a little after 10:00 - i remember it being 10:14, exactly.

for reference, the symphony started at 15:00. so, i was going to hang out until 13:30-14:00 or something, then go down early, get a coffee and wait for the thing to start.

and, yes, i nodded off, i think for obvious reasons, now that you know the story. but, let's look at the facts here:

1) i intended to be in the diner for around 3-4 hours, on a sunday morning for brunch, from about 10:00-14:00, at the latest. 3-4 hours for brunch on sunday (from 10:00-14:00) might be the most normal thing in the history of normality - if there's something more normal than that, you'll have to be explicit about it, 'cause i can't imagine it.

2) so, i bought eggs and coffee a little after 10:00. let's say it was 10:30. so, let's say it got there about 10:45, which is about right for this place. i bought an extra side of french fries when i was done, probably around 11:30-ish. so, they would have got there about 11:45-ish. i got sleepy when i was eating my fries. i had not yet finished my coffee.

3) so, i must have dozed off - with my fries and coffee in front of me - from around 12:00-13:00.

4) i am in this establishment frequently, and have always bought things when i'm in it. i have, however, experienced some transphobia from the staff that i've largely shrugged off....

so, you can imagine that i was rather baffled when they sent the cook out - pilate-like. he's the messenger. he didn't care. - to tell me i "wasn't wanted here" and would have to leave before they "call the cops".

i'm not sure exactly what they would tell the officers, should they have come in, while i was finishing my fries and drinking my coffee. i'm not homeless. i wasn't asking people for food or money - and i hadn't finished my meal yet. they would essentially have to admit that they were throwing me out because of my gender expression, and i might point out that they're lucky i'm not an american citizen, because that's a lawsuit they'd have lost, if i was. i would have had to leave if it had come to that, surely, but i'd certainly want to get that report and publish it, as well as hand it off to the detroit business association, to let them deal with it.

it woke me up, at least. i ignored the cook, finished my fries, used the bathroom and came back to the front desk.

"can i talk to your manager?"

"what?"

"the cook just came out and told me you were going to call the police. i want to talk to the manager."

"you've been hear since 10:00."

"it's sunday brunch. i. demand. to. speak. to. your. manager."

"ok..."

a few minutes later, this 20-something arab guy comes out. you can put this together, right? he's not the owner here; i know the owner here. so, we've got some transphobic muslim day manager throwing the gays out of a restaurant he doesn't even own. not acceptable, at all. i rightfully gave him shit for overstepping his bounds...

"is that how you treat your customers?"

and i laced into him for a good ten minutes. i had food in front of me. and, yeah, i'm tired, but so what? when you come in and buy something in a restaurant, you get the booth until you're done. i'm not hanging out without buying anything. i'm not staying for a long time after i've finished, either. i'm literally in the middle of finishing a meal, and waiting for the symphony across the street to start.

and, i demanded a fucking apology.

he did give me one. see, and this is the point you actually want to see in this circumstance - you want this person to understand that they're in the wrong, even if it doesn't click immediately, and i think he clearly did realize that, i could see it in his facial expressions. he looked like he was worried he'd lose his job. he didn't lose his arrogance about it, and his apology was clearly coerced and bullshit, but he knew what he did was wrong.

you might expect me to call for a boycott of the detroit coney one on woodward avenue, after that. you might also expect me to stop going in there. i actually think that's the wrong approach, in context - i will continue coming here (and if they call the cops on me for being queer, we can take it the community and let them adjudicate such a thing - they won't win that debate), and i would even like to put out a call for queers throughout detroit to frequent the coney one more often. let's have big, queer parties there every weekend!

there's laws in place that say you can't do what he did, but that's secondary to the general point - you can't let religious groups move in and put down rules and restrictions like this. if the message i got was "i'm a muslim, and i don't like you, and i want you to leave" then my response is "i'm a queer atheist, and i'll go where i please, and if you don't like it then you can leave, yourself.".

so, let's get all the queers to the coney one, let's take this place over; let's make it ours.

when i was done berating him, i went to the symphony a little early, got a coffee and headed in to hear the pre-show program, by the conductor. we're going to split this off, tactically....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

the weather for the night is really iffy. there's some chance, still, that this could be a nice night, and there's no indication at all that we'll get another one for months.

but, navigating the evening is going to mean getting out of the show in ferndale close to midnight - and maybe in the rain - and trying to get back to the tunnel for 1:15. should i take the bus? how much change do i have?

actually, that might be the best...yeah.

ok.

so, if i go tonight, i'll take the bus. i should get out in plenty of time. and, i want to get home, i don't want to be there overnight. easy enough.

yeah.

fuck.

let me right this review, first.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

to clarify a point: this might or might not be "gonzo journalism", but all it's intending to be is a journal.

i rigorously avoid naming people, and i'm purposefully fuzzy with places, when i need to be. i want you to be anonymous. you can out yourself, if you want.

but, i'm not telling stories - these are honest recollections, as best as i can present them.

so, a hunter s. thompson fan would certainly see a broad similarity in the things i write about, and may even in the way i write about them, but the philosophy here is really very different; he wrote flat-out fiction, broadly speaking, whereas i'm just leaving out names and contexts.

this shit really happened....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i didn't ever do the write-up after the human eye show when the bosnian muslim took me home and gave me those hunter s. thomspon glasses, did i?

she made a kind of a point about it.

was she reading this, too?

i don't know what kind of circulation this really has. but, i get hints. and, i suspect i'd be baffled if i really knew....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i was up late enough in the afternoon on saturday to get my tickets printed before the library closed, but i spent some time writing, and i got something to eat, so i wasn't out of the house until well after 21:00. i was sure i'd miss the show, which was supposed to be over at 23:00. thankfully, it was only the second act playing when i got there....

so, i got to see prissy whip, which is what i was there to see, and who came on somewhere around 23:30, i think. sort of. they were supposed to have a female singer, who was a no-show. i don't think anybody really knew the details except the band, but the rumour floating around was that it had something to do with a possessive boyfriend. she apparently made it the st. louis show on thursday, according to the footage, so something appears to have happened in that 48 hour space. hey, i don't know; i was just at the show, and she wasn't.

so, we got an instrumental set, instead, and it was actually fairly compelling, as it was. they're operating in a pretty syncopated style of noise rock, so removing the vocals just brought out the percussive aspects of the guitars, which you may or may not recall are technically percussion instruments, in a technical and eurocentric sense (i guess the arabs and indians would have a different take on the whole thing, but they're not me, so  they can figure that out on their own). so, they basically banged out this three part drums-guitar-bass percussion set for a few minutes and then abruptly stopped and that was that.

so, i'm hesitant to post something because it wouldn't really be an accurate representation of what i actually saw. but, you can check them out by googling them. they come recommended heavily by deerhoof, and there's reasons for it, even if it's maybe a little closer to melt banana, overall.

i did check out part of the next set, which was by a band called "pig's blood", but it was just screaming and yelling and breaking things and i don't listen to that kind of shit, so i was just back outside within seconds...

i actually spent a lot of time talking to the people outside that night, who were all 30+, and all felt like they were too old to be there, but in fact were exactly the right age. there actually weren't any kids there, and i'm the only one that seems to have actually got their head around this a long time ago: there haven't been any kids at any spaces like this in a long time, now. these kinds of shows are often 40+, let alone 30+. i'm ok with that; i don't want to hang out with kids in their 20s, anyways. but, it seemed to be the first time it clicked for some of these guys.

i also want to make a general point about my social skills when i'm drinking. yes - i'm friendly (in a good way) when i'm drunk. i talk to girls, and i talk to boys, and i talk to people in between, and i don't tend to really think much of it. i didn't used to be this friendly or this confident, though; i didn't used to have the nerve to just stumble into a group of random people of whatever gender and start talking to them, no matter how drunk i was. rather, i used to be a quiet, distant drunk that would sit in the corner and avoid eye contact and only speak meekly when spoken to. so, my confidence is a function of the transition; it wasn't there before, and it won't be there anymore if you take it away. that is, in fact, one of the medical cases for doing it - it gives people better social skills, because they feel more comfortable in their outward presentations. that's one of the things about this that people tend to have a hard time with, because i guess i just come off as having a bit of a swagger sometimes (which is a misinterpretation of the reality).

the actual truth is that i'm actually completely asexual and completely disinterested in romance, and while i do understand that this maybe isn't always as clear as i assume it should be, that doesn't change the truth of it, and shouldn't affect how i'm behaving.

so, i'm talking to what i presume to be a cisfemale about alcohol/caffeine mixtures, mountain dew and rockstar vodka, and she gets bored and walks off when i point out that i don't watch tv, 'cause i guess that had something to do with her perspective on mountain dew. i have heard something about a boycott, but i actually haven't looked into it, and i don't know what it's really about. i don't think i've ever seen a mountain dew commercial, ever. i legitimately didn't ask for her name and don't know it, and don't even actually even care, but am happy to wish her a goodnight, regardless - i'm just about to get up and leave, myself; this is just stage one of a long weekend, for me. this kind of random conversation is something that happens at least a few times for me, every weekend, in detroit - it's nothing special, nothing unusual. but, i look up and there's a dude grinning ear-to-ear on the bench.

"i didn't want to interrupt the conversation, but...."

the implication is clear enough, but it's completely wrong, and as mentioned, i've been through it before. but, i grasp that it's a hard thing to get your head around - you don't see somebody that feels confident in a female identity and is just having a girl-to-girl conversation about beverages, you see a confident guy with an array of pick-up lines that seems to be working, and are impressed by it and feel the need to comment on it. and, maybe you're tickled by the irony of it, given that you might have it in the back of your mind that you'd like to fuck me. but, you're wrong, dammit. every time...

i'm always just looking to hang out, and i'm sorry if i come off as friendly, but you gotta adjust, 'cause i'm not going to tone it down.

anyways..

after i realized the nature of the last band, i decided that i'd finish my spiked lemonade and go ahead on to the club when it was down to a few sips, or mostly done. and, as it was, i was in the process of leaving relatively soon, when somebody handed me a 40 of vodka, and i think you want to imagine a morricone-esque voiceover here, dry and somewhat chapped, just because.

"i don't want it, man. take what you want. i'm done."

we weren't actually in the desert, and the sun wasn't actually beating down (although the weather was pleasant), and he didn't actually spit after he told me to take what i want, and he didn't actually stumble off into the distance, but that is all secondary to the 40 of vodka i've been handed and instructed to do as i will with.

my bottle of mountain dew - 710 ml, or 24 oz - was down to the last fifth or so, at that point. i didn't fill it up, exactly, but i did take a fair amount.

so, i ended up at the club a little bit later and a little bit drunker than i intended to. i am often accused of being drunk when i'm actually not; on saturday, such accusations would have had merit, although i don't actually recall hearing them, which perhaps merely stresses the point.

i remember asking somebody what time it was when i got in. it was 1:15. early enough..

and, i remember quickly buying several drinks. i broke a five, broke a ten, broke the five i got back from the ten and then handed over three crumpled 1's - i remember all of this. did the drum and bass set play late? it seemed that way...

then it's a little blurry. until....

"you can't sleep at the club".

so, i jumped up, checked my pockets. i didn't immediately remember opening my second pack of smokes, and i thought i had an extra three dollars. i felt ok, though. so, i bought another beer and went back to dancing. we're clear, memory-wise, from here until i got to the diner...

what happened? well, you tell me, right. but, i can deduce a few things.

i found my cigarette pack a little later in my other back pocket and was initially confused about it. it had been ripped open the wrong way (from the bottom of the pack) and was half missing, almost as though it got cut up for filter. i was initially kind of baffled by that, but i now actually remember lighting a few cigarettes backwards, taking a few tries to figure it out, and then making an adjustment around it. so, i very specifically recall taking smokes out of my back pocket and flipping them around before i lit them - five or ten times, at least. that's what would happen if you rip your pack open from the bottom. i guess i gave a bunch away, but i do recall smoking out of the pack, on second thought.

in fact, i remember the smell of burning filter, and remember stomping them out, as though they were defective, and the next one would be better, just to have the same thing happen. there must have been a stash of five-ten wasted cigarettes out there, lit from the filter, and otherwise unsmoked.

i actually have a habit of smoking cigarettes backwards when i'm drunk, and only do it when i'm drunk. that's an idiosyncratic giveaway. if you ever see me do this, you know i'm drunk...

i know i was out in the back area when i was pulling the smokes out of my pocket. i wasn't asking around, but that takes me pretty late in the morning.

so, i must have sat down around 5:00-5:30 and nodded off for a few minutes, before somebody woke me up.

as it is, i know i enjoyed dancing to the drum and bass set through the night and through the course of at least the first four beers. i remember thinking "the set is going to end soon", and then it not ending, and kind of putting off having that smoke until it did. the music was good, and the dancing was good, so i kept with it, and avoided going off for that smoke a little longer than i normally would have - a sign i was having fun. and, maybe, the more i think about it, the more i remember buying that fifth beer. maybe? i'm sure i did, anyways...

as mentioned, the sixth beer happened after the nod, and i was able to spend the last hours of the set dancing, as the sun came up - which is the actual point of this sordid exercise. whatever experience i had with that vodka and those cigarettes earlier, i do remember dancing at sunrise. so, i'd argue it was worth it.

of course, it's my fault. i poured it. i drank it. but, i can promise you i'll do the same thing next time, if you give me a 40 of vodka and tell me to have at it, and i don't feel any particular shame about it, either. hey, i don't pretend i'm responsible; i have no responsibility to be responsible. rather, the operative question is this: how often do you get handed a 40 by a stranger and told to go to town with it? so, shouldn't you take advantage of the situation, because it's rare? if it happens again, i'll do the same thing, but what are the chances, right?

the set was done a little early, and the weather was warmer than expected, so i'm outside at roughly 9:00 with some people i think i've partied with before, and they want to roll a joint, but need to get into a car, because they're tired, themselves. so, before i know it, i'm in the car with them. and they're driving....

the driver claims he knows an after hours spot. dude, it's 9:00. you were at the after hours spot. but, we're nonetheless off for a spin, to find an empty spot (of course), before heading back to the bar. but, the puff was well received, just right then.

the audio guys are finishing up, and i had to ask them for a smoke, because i was actually out (or had otherwise destroyed my own pack). so, i'm having a smoke outside the bar when it starts raining, and it passes fairly quick.

"you don't think you're coming back in?", he says. and, this is the only suggestion i received that i may have been a little wilder than i recall...

but, i didn't want to come back in.

"you were on edibles last weekend, you said?"

it was the week before, actually. but, did i tell him that? or did he read it?

well, maybe he can read this, too.

i got to the diner around 10:00, and we'll start a new review for sunday.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

ugh.

why does the headache come back when i wake up?

are there two different things going on?

the sore throat has mostly converted into a cough, meaning i'm probably mostly over it. so, what's with my head, then?

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

if it was just sandra pupatello v brian masse, void of any context, i would vote for sandra pupatello. she's a better candidate, hands down.

and, that might be the most responsible choice, at the end of the day.

i don't want to do it. but, the greens are simply not presenting an acceptable alternative, and i don't want jagmeet singh making decisions. at this point, it seems like i'm voting to keep the religious fundamentalist out of power.

local polling suggests that she could steal this riding.

i ruled this out. but, shit happens. i might have to.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

"i bet you said the same thing about obama."

that's right, i did.

and, look what happened - he was awful.

are you a slow learner, or what?

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

jagmeet singh is a 37 year-old religious extremist that's never passed a bill and never had a real job.

he should not have any meaningful say in parliament. at all.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

actually, if i have to choose between giving the ndp the balance of power and giving the liberals another majority, i'll give the liberals another majority.

the ndp are not going to do anything to stop these pipelines, and most of the things they're running on are actually provincial issues that are outside of their jurisdiction. the only positive outcome of a liberal minority is the hope that we can get back to the polls sooner than four years.

and, every time i soften up on the greens, elizabeth may opens up her mouth and says something awful. no, liz, i'm not going to support a neo-con foreign policy that looks like it was written by michael ignatieff. sorry. the responsibility to protect is just a bullshit excuse to advance an imperialist agenda. we need to get out of the middle east altogether, yesterday. i can't vote for somebody that talks like this...

so, it initially seemed like the best outcome of this was to knock the liberals down, but the left is so bad right now, so not left, that it doesn't seem worthwhile. the more pressing issue is to overturn and replenish the left....otherwise, we're not getting anywhere.

the best thing that ndp supporters can do right now is to push the ndp's numbers down as low as possible in order to force singh out and replace him with an atheist. and, the best thing we can do if we're environmentalists is wait out elizabeth may - this has to be her last election.

i'm not going to vote for the liberals, but i can't vote for these other parties, either.

next time, i hope they're more left-wing - and they should interpret my abstention as a vote for them to shift left.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i care about facts.

i want people to know the truth.

this is impossible, to the power elite; if i don't uphold their lies, i must be a foreign agent.

that's the post-modern, nihilist world that our government agencies live in - honesty and the search for truth is considered too quaint to be actually possible.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

all hail putin!

i mean, umm, uh, nice night, huh?

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

so, i think i'm at about 70% maximum health, right now.

i think i can smell, and am going to get pissed if it smells bad tonight. right now, i think it's ok. we'll see.

head seems ok.

throat is jut a tad raw...

my computer is very slow because the cia is spying on me through facebook (mostly), and there's not really an answer but to shut down executables and restart them, which i can't do mid-review. so it took all day, yesterday, to do something that should have taken a few minutes. did the cops like the band?

they're very, very stupid people, these law enforcement officers.

for now, i have to finish the saturday review.

hopefully, i'm feeling well enough to do some work after that.

right now, i don't think it would be a good idea to go to see a show tomorrow night, i'm still too sick. we'll see how that evolves.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

it should surprise nobody that i didn't get out of the house until after 16:20 and missed the 16:30 bus by minutes, realizing the inevitability of it only once i got to the bank machine. so, i uncharacteristically bought smokes and headed down to the bus station to drink an untouched, non-alcoholic mountain dew (i decided i should save the little bit of vodka in my bottle until saturday, and that i'd just get an extra beer or two in or near the venue once i got there, early - intending to get there early).

the box office closed at 17:00, you'll recall, so catching the 17:00 bus over would have meant relying on the hope that there was somebody there between 17:00 and 19:00. otherwise, i was going to have to wait for the symphony to start and i was going to miss the prog show...

worse, i found myself in dire need of a bowel movement a few minutes before 17:00. maybe you've been in this situation, where you have to choose between squirming around on the bus and missing it altogether; i reasoned that it might even make sense to miss it at this point (because my chances of catching somebody at the box office were dependent on them being open for the friday night show), so i ran to the tim's, and did in fact miss the bus when i got out. at this point, i was no longer going to catch an early beer, so i ran around the corner to get a couple of shots of jager instead...

when i finally got on to the bus at 17:30, it was uncharacteristically packed, or at least had more people than i'm used to seeing, which meant a lengthy wait through customs that was even further complicated by a distressed transport trailer that didn't want to listen to the border cops in getting around the corner. so, i didn't get on my way until 18:00...

i got to the dso something close to 18:30, and did in fact get my beethoven tickets for sunday at 15:00. fait accompli. so, i'm off to this downtown bar i haven't been to before to see the psych show...

it's in a basement, it turns out, which i wasn't expecting. the floors are fluorescent and appear to glow in the dark; there's an arcade off to one side. beer is on tap and in plastic cups, which i don't like, but cheap, which i do like. the venue is broadly similar in layout to the shelter down the street. i looked around, but there was nobody outside to start, so i caught sacri monti without the aid of cannabis.

i can't be sure exactly, i'm new to the band, but i think they played their new record pretty much from start to finish in the roughly 40 minutes that they were allotted, which is roughly the length of the record. this is a five piece, with a moog/keyboard player and two guitarists in addition to the rhythm section. i mentioned that there's a dramatic mick ronson influence, but this is just the first thing that jumped out at me - it's, overall, a fairly good survey through early 70s british glam and prog, with multiple references to other seminal acts like hawkwind, pink floyd, king crimson and some genesis, too. this kind of thing seems to continue to go over well in california for some reason; there are contemporary california acts like mammatus and eye (well, ok. eye broke up.) that operate well in this space, while acts from pretty much any other place in the world seem to fall flat on it. maybe it's the angle of the sunlight hitting the ocean. i dunno.

this is probably an acquired taste, but if it is then i acquired it in the womb; i'm native to this, it just makes sense to me. i asked around and people were lukewarm about it, which is technically wrong, but not particularly surprising. every single person at the show should have been blown away by this set. if you get a chance to see this, don't miss it.

the next band up was called maggot heart, and i didn't spend a lot of time with them before i came in; i checked their bandcamp site long enough to conclude it was a lot poppier than the other two acts, and kind of left it at that. structure wise, they were essentially a corporate-style pop-punk band, and not particularly exciting, but, whether it was due to the bill or as a consequence of some other thing, they decided to extend the tracks a little bit, at least on this night. the result was a corporate-style pop-punk band with a jam band feel, which one could argue is sort of what the smashing pumpkins were, although the song structures were far more compressed than anything the pumpkins ever did. but, it ended up being some kind of alt. rock in that space, whether on purpose or not.

the songs were really not exciting, but the jamming saved the set. the drummer was especially useful in saving it...

the thing is that i don't know if what i saw was characteristic of them or not. i suspect it wasn't; i suspect that on most nights, you're going to see a more generic corporate pop-punk kind of set, something like nirvana, maybe. if they do the same kind of set they did on this night, though, they're at least worth not skipping. but, it didn't really speak to me, much - it's not a style of music i spend much time with anymore, at my age.

earthless headlined the show relatively early, and while i think the band is overrated, i was stoned enough to enjoy the set. i mean, listen - on some level you can't go wrong with this. you've got a drummer. you've got a bassist. you've got distortion on the guitar. you've got loud amps. so long as you don't try and sing, you can't fuck it up, right? well, if the audience is inebriated enough, anyways...

my technical nitpicking of the sound as less complicated than others might assume, and consequently sort of pretentious, is valid and everything, but it's secondary to the experience of actually listening to loud, instrumental music while baked.

and, yes, they made me laugh a few times with a series of absurd cliches. they just needed their little stonehenge, and it would have been spinal tap. but, that's fine, if you have fun...

i'm not going to see a band like earthless every night, but it's fun once in a while, if the bill has something more substantive on it. so, that's fine.

and, i had fun. i said that, right? maybe you'll have fun seeing them, too...

just don't actually take them seriously. they can do that enough for everyone else.

i was out of the show not much later than 10:00 - this was an early night - so i hoped to get down to another place i'd never been to before, namely the pop off world arcade over top of the checkers, right around the corner from the tunnel, in order to catch a local synthesizer player do a free set. hey, it seemed worth a beer. he said he'd either start at 21:00 or 22:00; i guess he started closer to 21:00, because i only heard 5-10 minutes before he stopped, and it was just kind of generic vintage synth music. i hope this venue does more things along these lines, because a synth bar is kind of unheard of, but perhaps overdue. i just had the one beer, and i guess i was out of there by 22:30-23:00.

i made it back to phog fairly early, with the intent to catch the late show there, which i largely did....

the first band was called 'of the pack', which is a local band that i've seen on a lot of bills around town but haven't actually seen play. and, i could've sworn that they were a bro-ish hardcore act, but it turns out they weren't; they had a kind of reggae-ish feel, on top of a pop-punk crux. i asked, and they claimed they were never hardcore. what can i say? i was more caught off guard than anything else. they did a cover of 1979 that missed the slur, which is a good way to describe them; it wasn't terrible, but they wouldn't bring me back for more, either.

i wanted to see bike thiefs, which were actually a bit more hardcore than i expected. based on the sound samples, i was expecting something roughly sonic youth-ish, but it actually came off more like very, very early thermals, with the kind of ranted vocals over the noise punk song structures. i found myself nodding off a little near the end of the set, and it's less because i was drunk (i wasn't.) and more because the sound was kind of hypnotic; it's more that they got me in a bit of a trance. so, i don't want to say i was disappointed. that's not quite right. but, it wasn't quite what i expected, either. if i were to see them again, i'd get coffee instead of beer....

i spent the rest of the night at phog, right until last call, got trolled by the friday night bartender about the use value of alcohol vs the use value of soda, and we'll talk about that through tomorrow's review, and stumbled out with a smoke at the very last minute. where's the party? nothing at villain's, which i learned earlier in the night was having a dungeons and dragons night (no joke.), but there's a whole lot of people at the strip club across the way....

i think i've mentioned previously that i've never been in a strip club. i certainly am not very interested about going into one at this point; you'd probably have to pay me to sit through it. i'd probably start crying if somebody tried to give me a lap dance. the whole thing's just insane, to me - i can't understand how these things still exist, in this day and age. but, they're around and there's people at them....

i'm actually hoping to bum a smoke from somebody, actually, maybe chat a little. yeah, it's like 3:30 or something - that's not late, for me. so, there's this guy that's like arab or something, and he's talking about how he's a law student. there seems to be an undertone to the conversation that the way we talk about immigrants in this country is backwards - they're largely upper class, in canada, because we screen them to be. it's the white trash that's poor. he's kind of sick of the racist narrative, is what he's trying to get across, and i actually agree with the point. his father's a doctor, his mother's a nurse, and they didn't raise him to be religious. well, he's out at 3:30 smoking at a strip club, i guess not, right? but, he is rich, though - they raised him to be that.

and, i'm finishing my smoke and about to leave, when these angry guys come stumbling out, and they're giving this guy a hard time because of where he's from. they're not drunk - i'm drunk; they're coked out. and, i've seen this before, actually. they blame bar fights on alcohol, but it's often not alcohol that causes these fights. i've seen enough of them. these fights have two primary causes - girls and cocaine. i think we've probably got both, here.

listen - i'm not going to stand up for some bigoted muslim that wants to nail me to a fucking tree because of my clothing decisions if he gets into a fight with an equally bigoted white supremacist. let them slaughter each other - we're better off if they're both dead. but, i'm not going to let these white trash frat boys rip this atheists' balls off just because of his ethnicity, either. i know what side i'm on, and what side i'm willing to fight for, and it's the side of non-believers and atheists and secularists. and i don't fucking care where you're from, or where your parents are from. at all.

so, they're getting up in his face....

"if you really want to get with the red and white.."

really? i don't know exactly what that means, but it was pretty clearly confrontational. so, i stepped in between them and asked:

"hey hey hey. is that really necessary."

see, in a situation like that, i'm white. i'm not always white, and i'm not particularly white, but, in context, i'm white. and, so that worried them, and you could see it in their eyes.

but, they look away, and they keep running their mouths off.

"i said, is that necessary?"

it was enough of a break that the arab guy was able to slip away, and i followed not long after him.

so, i got home after 4:00, made some pasta and crashed at something like 7:00. day two coming up....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

we started last week on friday night, and the primary intent was actually to go down early to get some beethoven tickets. everything else kind of developed out of this.

when i first looked at the weekend, i was mostly just turned off by the weather. sub ten degrees on friday night, and rain on saturday night? well, it's october - i might at least get out for a double matinee on sunday, though, with the 5th followed by the lpd. it also looked like i could maybe catch a late show at phog on friday night, if i could stand the weather.

i had a loose plan, though. there was a late party at marble on saturday, and a punk show at trumbullplex on the way there, so maybe i could essentially come down early and dance before the beethoven show, if i could convince myself that the punk show was worthwhile. it ended up working the other way around, when i realized the show at marble was a drum 'n' bass dj, which is rare in detroit; this then became the focus of the weekend.

so, i bought some tickets for the marble show on friday morning, only to initially find myself stonewalled by the dso. sold out? well, it's the fifth, i guess. after changing browsers (and operating systems), i did realize that there were still tickets, but i'd need a credit card to buy them online. i didn't want to wait until sunday morning, or even saturday night. could i get there on friday, then?

i had in fact been looking at a show on friday at a bar i hadn't been to before called delux fluxx, which is right downtown. for all the time i spend in detroit, i only ever really transit through the core. what was the last show i saw in the downtown core? not corktown, not midtown, not the eastern market, but right downtown? it might have been as far back as early 2017...crywolf at the shelter. i think. the only show i've seen at st. andrew's is swans, and the only other show i saw at the shelter is son lux. you might catch me dancing at a few after hours spots right in the core once in a while, but i otherwise am only downtown for as long as it takes to get out of it. there's just not much there for me, generally.

i had initially ruled the show out, because the headliner (earthless) didn't really grab me, on inspection. i'm generally looking for a level of abstraction that just wasn't really present in the sound, which was more of a cliched kind of throwback. neither the drumming nor the guitar playing seemed that impressive, and rumour had it they were starting to sing, too. ack. so, i had scratched that off, only to notice that the opening band was on teepee - and if somebody from teepee comes to your town, you should always at least check to see if they're any good or not. it turns out we've got a prog band here with a big early bowie or spiders/ronson feel to it. score.

still, i wasn't sure i was going to go until the ticket issue came up, at which point i decided i should go down early and do a few things in midtown. for example, maybe i could drop off some recycling at the depot, finally. it's piling up. but, oddly, the depot was closed on fridays, so i resolved to just go down early to get the tickets. according to google, the box closes at 17:00; if i catch the 15:00 bus, i should get there before 17:00 for sure....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

when you find yourself on the same side as lindsey graham and marco rubio, giant red flags should go off as to what you're supporting and saying and doing.

those are people you should never, ever, ever agree with. ever.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

woah woah woah.

will pushing the kurds out of the north of syria open up a space for isis?

no.

because it wasn't actually the kurds that won the war, it was the russians.

it is true that the kurds faced heavy casualties in the process of defending themselves, but the core of isis territory was always south of the euphrates (and adjacent to saudi arabia, which is where isis mostly came from), rather than north of it, where the kurds are. iraq owes a great deal of gratitude to the kurds; syria less so.

should isis think that it can mount some kind of comeback, the russians should be able to deal with it relatively easily.

...because it's the russians. they're good at this shit.

and, so, what is the pentagon's argument really about? it's mostly about trying to maintain the division in the country, and preventing the russians from reorganizing it. but, this is futile. the saudis can't beat the russians, and they know it. all the americans can do is sit around and waste everybody's time.

some people are going to die, and that's always very sad, but the kurds are occupying land that does not belong to them and that's what happens when you do that, because eventually the rightful owners are going to organize and fight to take it back if you don't get out. i would advise the kurds to withdraw immediately if they want to avoid casualties, in order to make way for returning syrian refugees. the syrians have a right to return, here; the kurds need to make way.

only the russians can reunite the country and end this endless war.

trump is actually completely right to pull out. he's doing the right thing, and the democrats look awful aligning with the military-industrial complex in opposing it.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

if i were to go to a mosque for some reason, i'd make to sure to dress very slutty.

....and walk through the front door, whether they fucking like it or not.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i don't think i've ever been in a mosque or synagogue.

when was the last time i was in a church?

i don't think i've been in one in windsor, and i don't think i've been in one in detroit, either. i'm just trying to think if i've seen a concert in one, and i don't think i have. i apologize if i'm skipping something.

i saw a silver mt zion in a church on elgin in ottawa in early 2012. that's firm. that's the last time, for sure.

i think the last church service i was at would have been around 2002, when sarah brought me home, one weekend. i only lasted a few minutes before i went out for a smoke.

i've seen a few shows in churches, and i guess i'm probably not going to get too pissy about it, but i would broadly prefer to avoid entering into them. and, they're not the right places for political anything....

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

see, if it was up to me, i would have boycotted the debate because it's in an inappropriate venue. you couldn't drag me into a mosque, church or synagogue...

there should not be all-candidate debates in religious venues. at all.

as it is, there's not much that the candidate can really do. a lawsuit would be pointless.

https://lfpress.com/news/local-news/mosque-shuts-out-ppc-from-debate-over-partys-stance-on-religion-hate-crimes

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

i've feeling better. the asprin is working, indicating i probably have a fever, and it's really gotta be strep.

we're going to finish this review, regardless.

friday may be a short night, and the only night this weekend, but it's firming up.

if i'm smelling what i think i'm smelling in here, i'm going to be fucking pissed in 24-48 hours when my nose is working again. if i didn't know better, i'd think he's chain smoking (cigarettes) right on top of me. that's the kind of thing that takes weeks to clear out.

i'm not a smoker. i should be able to smell it. but i'm sick.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

ok, it doesn't look like i'm doing anything constructive for right now, so why don't i get these reviews done. maybe i'll feel better in a few hours. or maybe i'll fall asleep.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this

listen, my lungs are fine. i'm not even coughing. no congestion. it doesn't hurt to breathe. my breathing is not restricted.

no chest pain. no muscle pain. no neck pain.

the sore throat is at the very top of the throat, almost in the back of the mouth. there is some film on my tongue, but nothing on my tonsils. they don't even look inflamed.

i can deal with a little sore throat; it's not that bad.

rather, it's the headache that's awful.

i have no memory of head trauma on saturday, and no reason to suspect it. i was dancing from around 6:00-8:30, got into a car with somebody for a bit, went back to the bar, had a smoke out front, talked to the sound guys and made it the diner for after 10:00. i did nap there, and we'll get to that. i was not experiencing any sickness or headache at the time.

i'm pretty careful with my health. there's a hospital down the street, and i have a magic swipe card that'll get me anything i want. so, if i need to get there, i'll get there.

i've been there....if you follow this, you know that.

right now, i'm ok. it's just a little strep, and i probably picked it up from sharing a joint or bowl or vape.

the liberals are supposed to do better than this